Entries in the 'Children' Category

Self Love

565.01Question: The quotation attributed to Buddha, “If you truly love yourself, you would never harm another,” seems to be a simple wisdom. What can you say about it?

Answer: If you really love yourself and understand what kind of world you live in, the integral world, how much it is all interconnected, then you will not harm others because in this way you indirectly harm yourself.

Question: Why did you just connect “love yourself” with “the integral world”? After all, to love oneself is an egoistic desire.

Answer: But if the world is integral and you influence the world negatively, then it comes back to you.

Question: That is, I feel that it comes back to me? So if I love myself, then I will not do evil to another person because it will return to me?

Answer: Yes. If the world is integral, then harming oneself or others are one and the same thing.

Question: And in loving myself I still do evil to another person?

Answer: I also harm myself this way.

Question: Does this mean that everything comes back? Does the boomerang effect exist?

Answer: Because the world is closed. It is round.

Question:  What do you have to say about another quotation attributed to Buddha: “Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.”

Answer: In principle, this is also true.

Question: So I should be grateful no matter what I have. Even if I am in the worst condition, I should still rise to the level of gratitude?

Answer: Gratitude is a prerequisite for receiving the feeling of happiness, the feeling of the light.

Question: How can I be grateful if I feel so bad? It is just impossible!

Answer: It depends on your perception of the world. Why is it so bad? Try to raise yourself anyway.

Question: Even in this state, I am obliged to reach gratitude?

Answer: Gratitude must be present in any state. Even a second before death.

Question: Do all prayers begin with gratitude?

Answer: Of course. And if there is no such attitude, then to whom do you pray?

Question: The state is high, of course! So whatever my condition is, I first give thanks?

Answer: Yes. But this is because you divide yourself into two parts: dark and light, suffering and thanksgiving.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 6/15/20

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What Will Bridge The Generation Gap?

598Question: What can close the gap between generations?

Answer: I hope that the past generation will be wiser and kinder to the new generation and the new generation realizes that it faces a very serious task to decide what the meaning of life is. They need to decide on their own, because the past generation will not be able to show them the way, but will support them.

We are at a stage when a new generation must acquire a new methodology, a new ideology, a new attitude to the world and to life. I wish them that.
From KabTV’s “The Post-Coronavirus Era” 5/21/20

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Blitz Of Kabbalah Tips About The Family – 5/21/20

560Question: Can a married couple of the same sex provide the right education for children?

Answer: No. A child must have two different people, opposite in their natural attributes.

Question: Is a family with a robot an option? Is there such an option in the near future of humanity?

Answer: I do not think so. That would not be a good family.

Question: Can we say that there are conflicts at the basis of a strong family?

Answer: Sometimes.

Question: Does online connection strengthen the family?

Answer: Not based on today’s Internet, no. I hope it will be the case in the future.

Question: Is there a future for the virtual family?

Answer: A virtual family cannot be the future. A family is not beyond the boundaries of the home.

Question: There is a whole section in family life called “expectation.” What should we expect in a spouse?

Answer: Mutual understanding, mutuality!

Question: Do we need to choose a partner according to the equivalence of attributes, or quite the opposite, the more different people are in their character, the stronger the unity between them is?

Answer: A couple needs to be opposite from each other and they need to understand their oppositeness, that each of them has a mind and the desire to complement each other.

Question: Is it a good idea to build a family today in the first place?

Answer: It is impossible without a family. A family needs to exist for our sake, for the sake of the education of children. A person without a family is not a human being, but half a body.
From KabTV’s “The Post-Coronavirus Era” 5/21/20

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View From The “Second Floor”

608.01Question: Is there a punishment for the sins of a generation? Is there a concept that children should pay for the sins of their fathers?

Answer: In general, yes. After all, we do not exist by ourselves, as we think. Usually, people believe that they can do whatever they want without realizing that they are within the framework of nature, which has its own laws.

We gradually reveal these laws at the inanimate, vegetative, and animate levels. But at the human level, we cannot reveal them. We can only assume that they exist.

The fact is that we look at inanimate, vegetative, and animate nature from the top-down, and therefore, we can understand it and somehow manage it. And we can only look at other people at our level. We do not have a “second floor” from which we can look at them. Therefore, on a human level, we constantly make mistakes. We have nothing to compare with, we do not have a second floor  to look from above to below.

According to the wisdom of Kabbalah, we must rise to the next level, called faith above reason, from which we will correctly see our earthly level and understand who we are and how we should behave.

Question: Where did the term “descent,” “decline,” or “coarsening” of generations come from?

Answer: We see that each generation develops in its own egoism, which is becoming more sophisticated, multileveled, and complex. Therefore, it pulls us down. We must necessarily balance it by striving upward.

We do not understand this yet. But in our time, we have already come to a state that allows us to understand how we can balance egoism and more or less influence our existence.

Question: Can we say that it is precisely the different level of egoism that is the cause of conflicts between generations?

Answer: Naturally. We are all selfish, but each one in one’s own way.
From the TV program “The Post-Coronavirus Era” 5/21/2020

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Turn Life Into A Game

275Question: Our entire life is based on a game. Russian sociologist Vladimir Ilyin wrote, “The game is a different life, acting as a man-made oasis inside the chaos of real life.”

If the game is our entire life, how can a person distinguish what is real life and what is a game?

Answer: There is no need to distinguish, you need to turn life into a game. This will be good.

Question: How can you not remain a small child?

Answer: Let me be a little child. I should feel like a little kid. What does it mean that I am big? What am I so big in? Nowhere and in nothing.

On the contrary, let me feel that I am small in comparison with the entire universe, with all the huge cosmos, and there are things for me to comprehend, to receive, and to be filled with to live with my eyes and my mouth open.

Question: The first function of the game is to compensate for the unused energy in the struggle for survival. A person accumulates energy, often negative, which he must somehow throw away, realize.

How can a person realize this negative energy today, so that it does not lead to fatal outcomes? How can a person use the negative energy that accumulates in him or her for constructive causes?

Answer: You must show a person the meaning, that this meaning is directly connected to him, and what can be the reward for realizing this meaning.

Question: The game ensures the preservation of the qualities given by nature, but are not required in the real life of an individual. How can a person reveal and recognize the hidden qualities, the hidden opportunities, that nature has implanted in him?

Answer: Only in a group. In a particular group of people when all of them are engaged in discovering their internal, unused, potential opportunities in order to rise above themselves. Above themselves is only in the society.

Thus, we need to gather together into a group where everyone wants to rise above themselves to reach such a connection between them when they will rise together into something common. Let us say ten people come together and become one. This “one” will consist of all of them, but together they will feel that this qualitative change in themselves that everyone became ten times smarter, ten times stronger, ten times more perspicacious, and so on.

Question: In an imperfect world with a hectic life, the game creates temporary, limited perfection. This is always some kind of a short cycle. Can the game be turned into an infinite game so that it does not end?

Answer: Yes, this is what a game is. A real game is one that can be turned into an endless game, an endless activity. However, only if there are many of us.

You cannot play the game alone. When there are many of us, we create completely different combinations through the game, as in a kaleidoscope. Have you ever looked through a kaleidoscope? When you turn it the pieces of broken glass inside it move into some kind of structure. So, do we.

When we make a kaleidoscope out of ourselves in this way, we get such pictures! We begin to discover ourselves as joint, compatible in such a form that in the end we receive one single whole, we become Adam (Man), that is, a combined element.

Question: What is a real game that is a win-win for everyone?

Answer: This is when a person reveals the true universe and begins playing it for real. In earnest!

Question: What does it mean to play in earnest?

Answer: It is when one plays above life and death, not for life and not for death, but above them for connection with others and builds perfection together with them. Only perfection can fill a person with meaning.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/12/20

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What Will Make People Kinder?

546.01Question: Some social networks help people become kinder. In this tense time, when the pandemic is raging, politicians fight for votes, and protesters demand racial justice, human communication is becoming more important.

Researchers at Carnegie Mellon University have developed an automated method to make communication more polite. Scientists are sure that politeness and kind communication will do good for us. Now they have developed an automated method to make communication kind.

Can such algorithms really teach a person a different way of communication and a different line of thought?

Answer: In principle, they can, to a very small extent. It depends on how seriously we will relate to such a communication model, how much we would be able to follow all these rules: sorry, please, thank you—and all the time instill positive emotions in each other, and so on.

This can soften society in some way. But to a very insignificant extent because by this we deviate from the purpose of creation.

The purpose of creation is to bring a person to the awareness of his nature as evil. Therefore, we need to understand that no matter how good, white, and fluffy we are externally, outside of ourselves, inside we will still remain nasty, black, dark, and evil. So, it will not change us from the inside, but it will help us quickly understand who we really are inside. Just like when you turn on the light in a room, you can better see how dirty it is.

Question: Is it that all kind messages, all kindness, and politeness only help to reveal the negativity that lurks inside?

Answer: Of course.

Question: What happens to a person further?

Answer: We begin to feel who we are within ourselves.

Question: Is it necessary to have both internal negativity and external kindness, external politeness, a positive attitude toward each other? Or should there be only kindness, grace, positivity, and harmonious communication?

Answer: We must constantly struggle with our greedy egoistic nature, and not just manifest all this on the outside in a beautiful form in relation to each other, like all the methods—both those you are talking about and others.

We must understand that everything lies not in beautiful outer packaging, wrappings, bonbonnieres, but in changing ourselves, our nature. Only then can we really achieve a state when humanity will become different. It will become different from within itself—giving, loving, and sympathetic.

Question: What help does this evil in man bring? Why is it given to us at all?

Answer: This evil is necessary in order to reveal our nature to us. This is our nature, this is us, not something artificial, external, extraneous. This is how our nature is revealed.

It is not easy to reveal to a person how evil he is. Talk to people and you will see how they react when you tell them who they are. They will hate you; they will beat you. They will not agree with you. How can you accuse them of what is allegedly wrong?!

A person does not like it when it is pointed out to him. We need to reveal it—to reveal it each to himself and to others, and to help everyone together come to the conclusion that we are terrible beasts and have no other choice but to correct ourselves as soon as possible; otherwise, we will eat each other alive.

Remark: You had an interesting tweet that said it is hatred that gives knowledge of how to fill the desire of another person. Therefore, the basis of life is self-love and egoism and the rest is its spice.

My Comment: Yes. So, it is written: “I created the evil inclination, and I made the Torah as its spice.”

Question: Why does hatred help fulfill the desire of another person?

Answer: Because it turns into hatred of its nature, and thus inversely in the opposite direction, toward love for another person. It turns out that by turning my hatred inside out, I can hate it in myself and love another person.

Question: Can we say that this hatred, this evil that is in a person, should be treated as a sparring partner that helps us become better?

Answer: Yes. This is called help against Him.

Question: What would you say to all people who really expect kind attitudes, warmth, and harmony in communication from others?

Answer: Do not wait. Do not expect anything good from anyone. Just understand that everything depends on each of you. Change yourself—and the world will change.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/1/20

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Live By The Laws Of Nature

959Comment: On one hand, you say that you need to live by the laws of nature, and on the other, you welcome that everyone has finally stopped producing unnecessary things and they can stay at home with their family.

My Response: This is a temporary phenomenon. I don’t think people can spend all their time at home. In principle, this is not necessary because it is an unjustified waste of time and life. It is necessary to do what is useful for society, for nature, for maintaining homeostasis.

Question: How do you think household responsibilities should be distributed among family members?

Answer: In a natural way. A man should help a woman, and a woman should maintain the home.
From KabTV’s “The Post-Coronavirus Era” 5/21/20

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Why Is There No Instinctive Love Between Us?

294.4Question: Can we assume that the instinctive love for children that nature instills in us can be used as an example of our relationship to other people?

Answer: It would, of course, be wonderful. This is what the science of Kabbalah calls for: a person should treat everyone as his family because the whole world is one family. But we are still far from that.

Question: Do you think that the family unit was created by nature in order for a person to receive at least some example of the instinctive love that is inherent in us and then he or she could go through life with this example?

Answer: In principle, in the beginning, the family was a unit in which several generations lived together in close connection with each other. This was how nature intended if man, with his or her egoism, which is constantly developing in him or her, did not break this connection and did not build something from the original good family unit that turned into mutual enmity and hatred.

We see that such examples are already embedded in us. Cain and Abel, although brothers, had enmity toward each other. In this example humanity shows how deep and kind family ties can produce a completely opposite result.

Question: Why is there no instinctive love between spouses? Then the family would be stronger and the upbringing would be better.

Answer: Because people feel a huge gap between themselves. They have a desire for each other based only on the sexual instinct. Therefore, one should not associate the reproductive instinct with the instinct of attraction. These are completely different levels of relationships.

Question: But why didn’t nature create such an instinctive love between partners as the love of parents for a child?

Answer: In order for us to create it ourselves. We must constantly learn this.

And our instinctive love for children is very weak. We also need to develop it and talk about it all the time. There should be normal examples around us. Unfortunately, this is not in man. Everything is suppressed by our personal egoism.
From KabTV’s “The Post-Coronavirus Era” 5/21/20

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Should We Open The Kindergartens And The Schools?

592.04Question: Currently there are preparations to reopen the schools and the kindergartens. Parents are afraid that their children will get infected and bring it home. Teachers are afraid that children will infect teachers and they will bring it home. Do you think that perhaps it is really possible not to open the schools, not to open the kindergartens?

Answer: I would not open anything now; I would just transfer all classes to the Internet. Children take it very easily. They browse all sorts of virtual pages all the time anyway.

Give them assignments and teach them via the Internet. There are great materials, whatever you want. Give them assignments, and at the same time prepare these assignments together with them. Have tests every day and so on. In short, everything depends only on us.

Question: What about the physical communication of children with each other?

Answer: Physical communication of children can be exactly like that, in order for children to meet and communicate physically with each other. They do not need this for the classes. Each one studies on his own with a notebook, with a blackboard, and with a teacher. All this they have on their computer.

Question: What should we do with kindergartens and nursery schools? After all, mothers do go to work.

Answer: It should be done very simply: teach children to exercise via TV or computer, to do some kind of homework, to communicate with virtual animals, people, and so on. That is, cultivate skills of virtual communication in them.

Question: Would you also put the children of kindergarten age in front of the screen?

Answer: Of course. Imagine a boy who you put inside an airplane! He sits in front of these switches, and the pilot sits next to him and teaches him how to operate them. What prospects opens up for him! Do you have any idea what you are doing for a child?

We can do the same with a ship, with submarines. This is not a movie that you show them about other people, but he, himself, interactively participates in it. He can even become a surgeon if he wants: he listens to the heartbeat and how it all happens.

Make it all interactive, make it so that it becomes his life! Then when he becomes an adult, he understands what this is all about.

Imagine yourself as a boy, how it would capture you!

It is up to you to choose what profession you want. You can go with them through all the professions this way. Show them everything there is! Make it interactive, as if they are in the forest running after a wolf or catching something, communicating with someone.

Question: Would you replace all these games of killing and capturing with the positive and educational ones?

Answer: Of course! You develop a person! He goes through all this and learns from this.

Question: Would you cancel all these wars that fill the Internet?

Answer: Absolutely! Absolutely everything that existed before today.

Question: Do you think that their effect is terrible?

Answer: There is nothing good about them! We need to make only interactive programs for children so that they would feel that they are entering life. These programs would have to be correct.

Then you would raise people the way you want them to be. I would show the girls how to take care of a baby, with diapers, and so on. How to take children for a walk. Here she goes for a walk with a baby, and she looks at herself from the side. Or even not from the side—she looks as if from within herself and sees all this. This is life!

Question: Then let us touch on the third factor, nursery school. Up to what age  should a mother stay with a child? Should she be paid for it, not to go to work, not to be sent anywhere? We usually send a child to a nursery school from the age of six months, if not earlier.

Answer: To the age of 12 to 13 years.

Question: Should we pay the mother to be at home with the child until he turns 12 or 13?!

Answer: Yes.

Question: To be with a child who is already an adult?

Answer: Yes. If it is a girl, she will be with her mother, will be helping her, and will know how everything is done. Then, when she becomes a young lady, a bride, a woman, she will be fine, she will know what needs to be done and how it is done, and she will not be calling her mother, “Mom, how do I make porridge?”

Question: Is it the same for a boy? Should he also stay with his mother until a certain age?

Answer: There will be a little bigger problem with a boy because he has to learn a profession.

Question: But it can be done interactively?

Answer: Interactively, yes. However, he should devote most of his time to this.

Question: Still would you also keep a mother with the child up to 10 to 12 years old for both boys and girls.

Answer: Yes. But they would still have, say, three days or even half-days allocated for walks. It should be when a person comes along and picks up the boys and takes them for walks, to a museum, or a sports field, etc.

Question: Should it be a coach, an instructor, or a teacher who picks up boys from an area and takes them to show the real, corporeal world? Does he also teach them how to communicate with each other?

Answer: Yes. Once a day, a walk for two to three hours, and another two to three hours of some games at the sports ground, and so on.

Remark: You have just painted a beautiful world.

My Comment: Why can’t we do that? What is there?! We do not need to build anything for this. We just need to reorganize ourselves and that is it. It is easy!

Remark: What you have just painted is so beautiful! But I do not think it is easy.

My Comment: It is not easy because of our character, because of our egoism, but it is in our hands.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 5/25/20

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How To Stop Suicide Among Young People

283.01Question: Currently, suicides among young people are becoming more frequent. Against the backdrop of mass layoffs, income decline, and social isolation, young people suffer greatly. They feel very strongly the growing pressures on the family. Scientists say that after the pandemic ends, there will be an increase in suicides.

What is the reason for such a rather desperate step—ending one’s own life at a young age—for a generation that is just entering life?

Answer: We live to feel pleasure. The moment we do not feel pleasure, that very second seems as dead to us, worthless. If these moments continue one after another, we simply do not know what we exist for.

If we stop receiving pleasure, we do not know what we are living for.

Therefore, it is quite easy for us to understand people whose connection with good times, with a profession, with pleasure from some actions, people who could create, build, be in the circle of friends, loved ones, and ones who love them, and so on, is broken. Then indeed, if all this is lost, what is there to live for? After all, the very essence of our nature is yearning for fulfillment, for pleasure.

It turns out that there are very few pleasures in our life today. There are no fulfillments. That is why so many young people are just trying to end this life. Why should they suffer?

Question: How can they compensate for previous pleasures when social contacts, connections, and communication were one of the main tools for releasing energy?

Answer: And today there is none of that. Do not make a comparison with the youth from 20 to 30 years ago. They were much more primitive than the youth of today that has a huge number of connections around the earth. Modern young people understand how everything works and see not only on themselves, but on the young people around the world such examples in life because of which they do not want to live. What is the point?

Our egoism goes through the roof, it asks for some new, special fulfillments, but we cannot give them it, and thus emptiness appears. But you have everything! Take an interesting book and read it! He does not even want to open it: “What book?” Who has read a book lately? He would check some things on his computer a bit, nothing interesting either. And so on.

In other words, people are overfilled with opportunities, but these opportunities are not the ones that can fulfill them.

Question: Youth is the age when nature pushes a person to constantly develop. That is, the driving force from within pushes a person to develop. Why does this movement stop abruptly now both from within and without?

Answer: We are in a transition period between two very serious paradigms, phenomena, periods of human development. Until our time, all of humanity developed by the growing egoism. This growing egoism pushed everyone forward. It was interesting to grow, there was something to grow for. My innate egoism accompanied me all my life and pushed me further and further. Therefore, there were very few suicide attempts.

Today, our egoism stopped pushing us forward. It does not show us a bright future in its development. Therefore, I do not see what I should live for.

Question: Then what is man born for?

Answer: This is the question! Have you ever thought about it?

Question: Could it be that the lives of young people are interrupted exactly at the moment when they ask themselves this question and do not find the answer?

Answer: And do not find the answer. This is absolutely right.

Remark: Extreme games are actively developing among young people today.

Answer: This is because they do not feel satisfaction in ordinary life and they still need to feel themselves. A person has a feeling of himself when he is on the brink of something. When he reaches the edge.

Question: How can you not bring this borderline you are talking about to a critical outcome?

Answer: But they want it.

Question: Isn’t the aspiration for the extreme, for reaching beyond the boundaries of ordinary life, an aspiration to find something more?

Answer: I do not think that it is just because of that. They just need a feeling that they are alive. Living! And it does not exist in ordinary life.

Our life is over; our world has reached its limit for us. A person comes to a state called “reaching the edge”; he has reached the boundary. What is beyond it? Nothing!

If he does not end up with us where we will teach him how to get to the next level of the universe and not through death or some games, if he does not come to us, then there is nowhere to go. Then they resort to suicide.

Remark: I still want to find the rails on which a person, despite the fact that he is now in quarantine during the pandemic, when everything is collapsing and he feels that his life is also collapsing, would see these rails, stand on them, and go forward like a train.

Answer: No, For this he must come to us to study. You cannot just ride a train. There is a train, but you need to board it, hang on to it, and ride forward together with the others.

Question: How can people pass this tipping point?

Answer: They will not pass it until they discover the meaning of life, which is not in this egoistic life. Otherwise, there is no need to exist. They will kill themselves more and more.

Question: And where is this meaning if not in this life?

Answer: It is above it. You do not have to die for this, but you must rise above this life from our egoistic life into the altruistic one.

Question: Doesn’t that also mean death, in a way?

Answer: No, we do not kill anything. On the contrary, we are developing. Therefore, we need to talk about it a lot, explain a lot, gradually enter this area with our feelings and minds. However, in general, it is what gives us the answer to the question of the meaning of life and how to continue this meaning from our small egoistic world to a huge, open altruistic space.

Question: British social services say that in April, about half a million calls were received from teenagers and young people who were on the verge of committing suicide.

What would you say to young people who are just starting to live now? What do they need to do? Where to turn in order not to hit a dead-end, a limited path that ends after a certain amount of time, but to walk an eternal, endless road?

Answer: We need to convey to them as quickly as possible the method of revealing the upper integral world. Then they will understand what is worth living for. That is all we can do for them. They do not need anything else.

Question: What will they receive in this integral world?

Answer: Eternal meaning. Eternal existence in eternal attainment, in eternal fulfillment in unlimited form.

Question: Will they not feel stressed or lonely then?

Answer: Not at all! On the contrary, all this stress, loneliness, everything they have experienced, everything that has formed in them, this vacuum, this emptiness will be filled with the real meaning of life.
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/12/20

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