Entries in the 'Love' Category

“Where Is Our Survival Instinct?” (Linkedin)

My new article on Linkedin “Where Is Our Survival Instinct?

Which is stronger, the survival instinct or the hunting instinct? In the animal kingdom, this question is simple: The survival instinct overshadows all other instincts and fully dominates the behavior of animals. When there is a forest fire, natural enemies flee side by side and do not touch each other. Their survival instinct suppresses their hunting instincts and everyone understands that now is the time to run. The time for hunting will come only once the immediate danger is gone.

With humans, things get a little trickier. We want to survive, but we also want to dominate, to rule. In many cases, we want it more than life itself. Think of the risks people take for fame, how they risk themselves and (mainly) others in the battlefield, and you will see that for humans, life comes second when fame or power are concerned. We use any opportunity to trample them on our way to the top of the heap. When a common danger threatens people, there will always be those who take advantage of the fact that people are busy fleeing from the danger and are unaware of the danger lurking for them from other people.

It does not have to be a physical danger. People may take advantage of natural disasters to make a fortune out of other people’s misery. Even in the midst of this pandemic, countries and corporations are taking advantage of their technological and economic powers to profiteer at the expense of others. It is obvious that this attitude will turn against them, since any place where the virus can spread will eventually become a source of a new strain, but governments cannot see beyond their immediate profit, and all of us suffer as a result.

This callous exploitation is human nature, and the sooner we acknowledge it, the sooner we can begin to change it. If we don’t, the future blows, the outcomes of our misconduct toward each other, will still teach us how to be considerate, but the lessons will be far more painful and costly both economically, and in human lives.

Either way, we will eventually learn that in a connected reality, where everyone depends on everyone else, nothing can be more senseless than to act selfishly. Our sages, who realized that we are interdependent thousands of years ago, wrote about it in the Jerusalem Talmud. In Masechet Nedarim (9:4) they write, “[Suppose] one is cutting meat, and the knife descends into his hand; would he consider avenging his hand and cutting his other hand for cutting the first? So is this matter … the rule is that one does not take revenge against one’s neighbor, for it is as though he is taking revenge against his own body.”
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The 15th Of Av —A Step From Hatred To Love

935There comes Tu B’Av (the 15th of Av)—the day of love. It is known that the 9th of Av is a day of sorrow, destruction, catastrophe, a day in which all evil is revealed. And six days later comes Tu B’Av, a completely opposite day when we celebrate the day of joy, the day of love.

All this joy is built on the sorrow of the 9th of Av. Those people who discovered and felt the 9th of Av as destruction will now be able to reveal the day of the 15th of Av as a day of joy and love, connection.

We want to build good, kind relations between us, but we are not able to do this, and two times our hopes are crushed (the destruction of two Temples). First, the hope of living in friendship collapses, which is called a Temple at the level of Mochin de Neshama, and then we even make an attempt to come to love, which also collapses, a Temple at the level of Mochin de Haya.

We fail twice; we build a connection and it collapses, and we build again—and again destruction. But each new construction takes place on the ruins of the previous destruction, and therefore, after these two ruins, for the third time, we manage to build a Temple of love, unity, solidarity, and connection.

We go through the stages of construction and destruction, revealing all the shattering of the 9th of Av and against it, by making efforts, we will be able to reveal the connection and love, the revelation of the upper force between us of the 15th of Av.

It seems, how can one come from destruction to construction and love? But the fact is that both of these states come from one root. We are not talking about a building, but about building inside the heart. At the moment when we feel a shattering in our heart, hatred and rejection, breakage on breakage, and really do not want to be in this state anymore, the turnover from hatred to love happens very quickly.

To do this, you just need to understand that all the destruction is happening between us, we are destroying the Temple by not wanting to get closer to each other. And then comes the realization of evil, that our egoism is the cause of everything and it is necessary to break it in order to rise above it from hatred to love. This is called a “return to the answer,” and it can happen instantly. That is why the day of sorrow is so quickly replaced by the day of love.

First of all, we need to feel that we are really in destruction, in hatred, which causes all the troubles in our life, all the misfortunes. And so we come to the need to achieve love.

The 9th of Av symbolizes the destruction of the First and Second Temples, and the 15th of Av (Tu B’Av) represents the Third Temple and is therefore called the day of love. Love, the strongest connection, is the result of all our corrections. And we need to understand that it is not about the building, we don’t need to build it out of stone. This is a Temple that must be built in our heart.
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From KabTV’s “The Peace” 7/20/21

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“Heaven And Hell – Where Are They?” (Linkedin)

My new article on Linkedin “Heaven and Hell – Where Are They?

“Imagine there’s no Heaven,” sang John Lennon. “No Hell below us, above us only sky,” he went on. In a way, he was right. The wisdom of Kabbalah teaches that Heaven and Hell are not places, but states in our relationships with one another. Hell is when we cannot stand each other, a bit like today except that we are more aware of our hatred, and Heaven is when we love each other as we love ourselves, pure and simple.

There are no people, animals, plants, or minerals in the wisdom of Kabbalah, no places, times, or movements. When Kabbalah books discuss relationships between people, or describe journeys from one place to another, they are actually using them as symbols to describe people’s relationships with one another, and how much love there is between them.

That quality of love, by the way, is what we refer to as the “Creator.” He, too, is not some entity or a deity in the sense that religions think about Him. He (or rather It) is the quality of love, the nature of love.

When a person acquires the nature of love, it is regarded as attainment of the Creator, and then that person is considered to be in Heaven. When we discover how hateful we are toward each other, that our relationships are based on exploitation, manipulation, and abuse, then we are clearly in Hell. But if we already know that we are in Hell, then we are probably on our way out of it, since now we can begin to change ourselves, to correct our nature from absolute self-absorption to caring and benevolence.

It turns out that according to Kabbalah, we determine whether we are in Heaven or in Hell, and we determine it according to our relation toward others. So, simply put, Hell is total hatred, Heaven is pure love. Doesn’t it make perfect sense?

“A Granddad’s Heart” (Linkedin)

My new article on Linkedin “A Granddad’s Heart

When I first became a granddad and saw my grandson for the first time, my heart filled with love. I held him in my arms; I wanted to play with him, to do something for him to make him feel good. I had never experienced such an emotion before that time.

Love is the reason we are here in this world; it is the reason why the world was created. Yet, unlike natural love, such as the instinctive love of a grandfather to a grandchild, among strangers, there is natural resistance, alienation, and enmity, rather than love.

However, life is formed precisely by overcoming these emotions. Every living being evolves by overcoming resistance and hardships. These “obstacles” create the need for growth and development. Had it not been for hardships and resistance, there would be no evolution and humans would never have come to be.

Feelings of separation from others, alienation, and enmity are therefore not negative emotions; they are levers for growth. We see them as negative when we don’t want to rise above them and grow. If, instead of rejecting them and fearing them, we would see them as opportunities to grow and develop ourselves, we would welcome them and benefit from them tremendously. Moreover, by rising above them, we would create a greater and tighter bond than the one we had before the appearance of those “hindrances.”

For example, think of the complexity of a unicellular creature compared to the complexity of the human body. They are incomparable. The reason for the creation of such a complex system as the human body is precisely the obstacles that all the levels of complexity encountered before they came to make a human organism. In a sense, therefore, we “owe” our lives, our existence, to the hatred and separation that appeared on the levels preceding ours.

This should teach us that we cannot eschew our duty to face the hatred that is being revealed among us today. Hatred appears for no other reason other than to promote evolution and greater union. If we avoid facing our resistance and uniting above the new and tougher level of hatred, we will hamper the evolution of our own species and pay heavily for it.

Our attitude toward the social crises plaguing our planet should therefore not be as natural as among family, but rather conscious and intentional. We should acknowledge that we do not feel like family, use family relations as an example to strive for, and try, together, to establish such relationships among us.

The key word here is “together.” Overcoming mutual alienation must be a mutual effort in which all parts of the population participate. Otherwise, one part will exploit the other and the whole feat will tumble like a deck of cards. We must install the awareness of how paramount it is that we form union above our separation until we truly feel as one family. Today, our lives, and the lives of our loved ones, depend on it.

“What Is Love In One Sentence?” (Quora)

Dr. Michael LaitmanMichael Laitman, On Quora: What is love in one sentence?

To love means to fulfill the other, to live according to the desires of the other.

Based on the talk “Communication Skills: Love Is a Law of Life” with Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman and Michael Sanilevich on October 23, 2020.

Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.

How To Find A Spark Of Love In Yourself

610.2A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born.
(Antoine de Saint-Exupéry)

We are hidden from ourselves in such a way that we do not know who we are.

In fact, we are parts of God. Everyone! Pieces of God.

Question: So there is a divine spark in everyone?

Answer: Yes. How to reveal it, how to connect all these parts, this is what has been given to us. But people are not aspiring toward it yet.

Question: If a person would observe from this particle that is in him the particle of another, from this particle, the divine spark, and he sees the divine spark in the other, what would happen then?

Answer: Then they would join together, gradually unite all the others, and create out of themselves, out of all these particles, the receptacle for the Creator.

Question: One way or another, we must come to this? See this spark in yourself and in the other?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Can you call it a spark of love?

Answer: We must unite our sparks of love from the existing sparks of hatred in us and then the Creator will clothe Himself in these sparks of love as love itself, as feeling itself.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 12/10/20

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“What Does True Love Really Look Like?” (Quora)

Dr. Michael LaitmanMichael Laitman, On Quora: What does true love really look like?

In the lives we currently know, true love is nonexistent. If we start rising to our next degree of development, above our current life, where we all come from, then we start discovering true love.

Today, there is a need to re-educate ourselves about love, even though life itself is doing most of the work for us. We need to realize that the instances of what we call love are but tiny sparks within an omnipresent higher love that gradually draws us to its discovery. And the discovery of this higher love is synonymous with discovering the meaning of life. It is a completely different feeling—an attraction, connection and fulfillment that is whole, perfect and eternal.

The ideas about love that propagate through novels, TV shows and films only confuse us. From a biological standpoint, we should by all means find suitable mates, raise families and our next generation. But more importantly, if we direct our aspirations spiritually, toward love for all humanity, then everything will fall into place.

Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.

Let’s Talk About First Love

284.05Comment: Let’s talk about first love. You know, the first feeling is that you froze, something happened to you! Something skipped a beat, and you are ready to give everything and all your life, just not to break away. Just for her. This object is everything!

I remember the girl Tanya. I remember my first feeling when I looked at her like that! I wanted her to pay attention to me. And all the time I was looking for a place to be closer to her. All the time, just for her to pay attention! She didn’t.

My Response: This is natural. It’s the same for everyone.

Comment: This feeling is given to us.  It is unforgettable. Not in 20 years, 40 years, or even in 80 years does a person not forget it.

Answer: No, until the end.

Question: Do you remember your first love?

Answer: I also met her here in Israel when I was about 60 and she was the same age. She became very ill and died. Her husband called me and told me that Luda had died.

Question: Was it your unanswered love? In childhood?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Why is the first love not realized? Why? Such a feeling!

Answer: So that you can always dream about it. About the very feeling of love, about this feeling. And if you were to connect, you would ruin that feeling. In this way, the Creator places it among people, and it is in this spiritual form that you strive for, but it is unattainable.

Question: So it’s like the Creator says, “Remember this all the time”?

Answer: Yes. It’s sitting somewhere in you.

Question: That is, this feeling when you are ready to give everything, you forget yourself, you dissolve in the other?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Is this what gets into a person’s heart? Like a splinter. And is it there all the time?

Answer: Yes. And everyone has it.

Question: Whom do I love? I love her at this moment of the first love?

Answer: No, you don’t even see her as a matter of fact. You are looking at her not with the right eyes. You were just shown that there is some spark in her that attracts you, and that’s all. And you want to see that spark all the time.

Question: Is it in order for me to always look for that kind of love?

Answer: You don’t even have to look for it, you are just tied to it.

Question: So this is all happening for me to know that such love exists?

Answer: Yes. So that you know what striving means.

Question: And so you would strive for this?

Answer: Yes. But, as a rule, no one gets marrieds to their first love.

Question: Is there an upper force behind this, the Creator?

Answer: Of course, this all goes according to the upper program! This is very well thought through, we are brought up in this way.

Question: Can we say that this means that the next sentence will be: “The Creator is love,” “God is love”? Is that what He wants to tell us?

Answer: It’s at the end. This is after you have lived one and maybe more than one life, and have accumulated a few more such impressions from your first loves. Then you will feel what it really is—true love.

Question: Will I then feel that I did not relate to her, but it was all to the Creator?

Answer: No, of course, not to her.

You haven’t even seen her. There was a spark placed in her for you, for which you were striving all the time. Otherwise, there is nothing.

Therefore, it is very, very rare that people meet for the first time (at school or somewhere else), fall in love, get married, have children, create a family, and live the rest of their lives together. I’ve seen a few cases like this, but… I’ve always been very interested in looking at them.

As a rule, they have many children. Interesting. And they somehow understand each other very, very clearly.

Comment: These are happy couples.

My Response: Yes. This is very rare.

The first love is given, so that we realize that we need to seek eternal, upper, true love. Not a person to a person, and not a person to a party, and not a person to the motherland. Only to the Creator. Through other people—love for the Creator.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 4/1/21

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The Torah Is The Instruction On How To Achieve Love

527.05The Book of Zohar, vol.7, Behaalotcha, Item 58: Woe unto one who says that the Torah comes to tell literal tales and the uneducated words of such as Esau and Laban. If this is so, even today we can turn the words of an uneducated person into a law, and even nicer than theirs. And if the Torah indicates to mundane matters, even the rulers of the world have among them better things, so let us follow them and turn them into a law in the same way. However, all the words of the Torah have the uppermost meaning.

The problem is that people do not understand the Torah, they do not understand that it describes the laws of nature that we must comply with in order to exist in a correct relationship, in a correct unity with nature.

Its most important law is “Love your neighbor.” So it is written: “We should interpret that it is known that it is impossible to achieve love of the Creator before a person is rewarded with love of people through “love your neighbor as yourself,” which Rabbi Akiva said is a great rule in the Torah.

For a person striving to fulfill it, this law includes all the other laws of the Torah.

Comment: This is very strange because the Torah mainly writes about murders but nothing at all about love.

My Response: It writes about how difficult it is to love your neighbor as yourself. The entire Torah is written about this.

Question: So the Torah is the instruction on how to achieve love for your neighbor?

Answer: Only that!

Question: And what are the Ten Commandments?

Answer: In order to fulfill the law of “Love your neighbor,” there are 613 (Taryag) of all kinds of sub-laws. They are included in the Ten Commandments, which are included in one basic law.

Question: If we take at least one commandment, suppose, “Do not steal,” what are we talking about?

Answer: “Do not steal” is natural. Is it possible to implement the law of “Love your neighbor” and steal? In this law, there are more internal, higher, although seemingly irrational rules. But in principle, it starts with purely human relationships.
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From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 6/3/19

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“How Can I Win The Hearts And Love Of Other People?” (Quora)

Dr. Michael LaitmanMichael Laitman, On Quora: How can I win the hearts and love of other people?

You can win the hearts and love of other people by loving them, which means feeling their desires and doing everything possible in order to fulfill them. You will then act toward them in a way that they like and enjoy.

Based on KabTV’s “Kabbalah Express” on April 12, 2021. Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.