Entries in the 'New Life' Category

Filling The Place of Lack—An Exercise In Mutual Relations

600.01Question: A woman feels that she gives a lot at home and to the family. All that giving makes her feel that she gives and gives, but has nothing, that she has no air to breathe and that she does not receive anything. How can this be explained?

Answer: There must be mutuality. The family members need to learn what they are doing in order to receive from her so that she feels that they receive from her and thus fill her as she fills them. This is something that we need to learn since we lack the common feeling.

This is what usually happens in relations between a husband and wife; each one thinks that he or she gives to the other, but does not receive anything, or does not understand what he or she receives.

Question: Is there perhaps an exercise that each of us can do in order to advance?

Answer: We need to learn every day, constantly, since it is about a person’s attitude to life. During our life, from the moment we were born, we receive tips only as to how to develop our ego, that is, a one-way system. What we need is to constantly see the mutuality in our relations, how we connect between us. And actually, in the middle, between us, we need to reach such relations in which we do not need anything from each other.

We need to develop give and take relations so that, besides the ability to give to you, I receive from you only in order to show you how I feel, since I need you.

Question: What do we actually give to each other?

Answer: Only a desire; each one gives others a desire, and thus we develop good and right connections between us. In fact, none of us needs anything except the right attitude.

Suppose everyone has everything, but one needs someone to give to, someone to care about, and from whom to receive mental fulfillment. I need to look at the other and try to give him the feeling of participation on my part in order to fill their desire. My participation is not in a material sense, this is not important, but rather, it is mental fulfillment. By doing that, we will feel that there is not only a connection between us, but also a relationship in which we cannot live without each other.

Today we already feel mutual dependence between us, and we are going to reach a state in our evolution in which each one really feels that he needs all the people in the world in order to give to them, to open their hearts, and to give them his care. And what will the person himself be filled by? By the fact that others are ready to receive from him and vice versa. Then we will reach the state in which we will all truly provide each other with unlimited fulfillment.
From Kab TV’s “New Life” 10/31/21

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The Woman’s Correction
It All Starts With A Woman

New Life 1328 – Rank Discrepancy In Organizations

New Life 1328 – Rank Discrepancy In Organizations
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Yael Leshed-Harel

How can organizations ensure that employees at every level feel important and appreciated? While hierarchy is necessary, it can lead to comparison, competition, and separation between higher, middle, and lower workers. These obstacles can be overcome if everyone is included in working together toward a common goal.

Management should hold regular talks to emphasize that mutual benefit can be achieved only through the efforts and participation of every worker and all will prosper through working together. All are equal participants toward accomplishing the goal, and even simple work is essential. We are all mutually dependent, each one does their part for the good of the whole, and recognizes the value of each one’s unique contribution. Everyone is responsible for creating an environment where everyone is valued, where each one is greeted as a friend by all the others.

Upon entering the gate of the workplace, each one should peel off all their shells and enter with a warm heart and uplifted spirits for having been granted the opportunity to work together in common purpose.
This summary was written and edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1328 – Rank Discrepancy In Organizations,” 12/19/21

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Building Trust In A Relationship

962.5Question: You say that it is an art to build trust and good relations in couples. It can come after many years of crises and mistakes. What is the key principle in the art of building trust?

Answer: There are two things. The first is to understand that we are egoists and have been through different crises in life. The second is that from now on we want to build correct and good relations and to enjoy life.

Question: How do you define the concept of trust in a couple?

Answer: It is about setting an example, relating to your partner with an open heart, and receiving whatever comes from him or her as something that is basically good.

Comment: I see that you have great trust in people.

My Response: Not at all, but there is no choice. We need to know how to feed our egoistic beast so that it will agree to connect with our partner so we will live a life of joy.
From KabTV’s “New Life 1327 – Building Trust In A Relationship” 12/12/21

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New Life 1327 – Building Trust In A Relationship

New Life 1327 – Building Trust In A Relationship
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz

Without trust, life is impossible. It takes artistry to build trust between spouses. We must care for the other’s needs, knowing that when things are good for my spouse, they are good for me as well. If I make concessions and do good deeds for my spouse, I oblige them to do the same for me. When transgressions arise, we must talk with an open heart about our love for our spouse and focus on our common intention to build a good life together, starting anew from a clean slate.

We need to reach a state where we don’t lie to each other whatsoever. If we were hurt by our partner, we can tell him or her that we were hurt and learn together how to improve. I should give an example of relating with an open heart and see what comes from the other as something good. Although we may have passed through difficulties, we want to build good and proper relations and have a good life together.
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This summary was written and edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman
From KabTV’s “New Life 1327 – Building Trust In A Relationship,” 12/12/21

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New Life 1326 – Trust Between Parents And Children

New Life 1326 – Trust Between Parents And Children
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Yael Leshed-Harel

Building children’s trust in their parents provides them with a firm foundation for confidence later in life. Trust must be taught by example through telling the truth, keeping one’s word, and cultivating love and respect within the family.

Sometimes a parent is faced with a dilemma and must choose between keeping their word and doing what is right. In such a case, it is necessary that the child understand and feel the dilemma they faced and the parents’ pain from breaking the trust between them and that the parents love for her or him was greater than their word. We are connected as if in a single body in which we can approach life together.
This summary is written and edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1326 – Trust Between Parents And Children,” 12/5/21

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Every Man For Himself

962.1Question: What is the greatest danger that you see as a result of the fact that trust between the individual and society is breaking down?

Answer: A person who loses touch with his nation, his state, and the land itself, does not care whether he lives here or any other place. If he does not feel that the government represents him, it is not important for him to fight for the government either. There is no connection to nationality here, and that is the problem.

The education that we have received is that a person should care about himself, and that if you are happy here—fine. And if not, you can look for another place on the globe. If you succeed, it is fine. But what is important is not to be a sucker.
From Kab TV’s “New Life #1325” 11/28/21

Related Material:
New Life 1325 – Building Public Trust
New Life 1204 – Trust
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New Life 1325 – Building Public Trust

New Life 1325 – Building Public Trust
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz

There is a lack of trust all over the world between citizens and governments who care only about themselves. How can leaders restore trust again?

On the scale of the city, a mayor must demonstrate that the needs and common desires of the public are more important than his or her personal ambitions, that the mayor has listened to all the diverse needs and viewpoints and he or she has a vision and a plan that benefits everyone.

The mayor must work against egoism that causes each person and sector to act solely for their own benefit. The mayor should lead an educational-cultural movement that will establish consideration of others in every person and group. The mayor’s goal should be to promote the understanding that the city is like a family and awaken the feeling that we are all in this together and everyone’s needs must be included.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1325 – Building Public Trust,” 11/28/21

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Educating Children To Sense The Filling

508.1Question: Children at school see that everyone gets new things and they also want to buy new things. How can we educate children and raise them from the level of the world of consumerism?

Answer: It all depends on how important we see things. We need to educate children in advance and work with them so that they will know that the important thing in life is—their internal property. After all, I get no pleasure from buying a new washing machine since I internalize it and swallow the pleasure from buying it. So I can receive pleasure from things that I don’t need to pay for like books that I read or things that I see.

Question: How do you define an internal property, what does it include?

Answer: Games in general, sports, and friendships, anything that not related to purchasing with money. All these things fill a person much more than shopping.

Question: Will one’s internal property fill the internal need to buy or to receive something new?

Answer: We live from impressions, from the sense of the filling. If I am in a mutual relationship with someone and we fill each other through conversation, we acquire knowledge, a mind. We are filled by watching a movie together, by listening to music. I don’t have to pay for an object in order to enjoy.
From Kab TV’s “New Life” 11/14/21

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New Life 1324 – About Consumerism And Internal Property

New Life 1324 – About Consumerism And Internal Property
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Yael Leshed-Harel

The experience of shopping brings us pleasure, excitement, success, and status. In addition, Internet purchases create the anticipation of delivery, and the excitement of opening the box.

The nature of the will to receive is to always desire to acquire something new. The more we receive, the more we enjoy. It’s not that we swallow the object itself, but rather we swallow the pleasure we receive from acquiring it.

We need to ask ourselves what is needed for life, and plan ahead to buy only that, not what the advertisers persuade us will bring pleasure. Otherwise we find ourselves surrounded by objects that just gather dust, while the emptiness of our will to receive remains.

We should educate children by example and teach them to seek inner fulfillments that don’t cost money—books, music, games, sports, relationships, and conversation. Healthy consumerism is buying only what we truly need and raising our importance for attaining inner assets.

This summary was written and edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1324 – About Consumerism and Internal Property,” 11/14/21

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New Life 1323 – Feeling Equal To Others

New Life 1323 – Feeling Equal To Others
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Yael Leshed-Harel

Being equal to others is generally not enough for us; rather, we want to stand out, to be unique and different in some way. If not, if we compare ourselves to others and measure our worth as “less than” or “not enough,” we feel great suffering. We measure ourselves through the eyes of others.

We need to look for how we can give our unique gifts to others. If we help and love those around us, no one will stand in our way. There is room for everyone. Even a small contribution is important since it joins with others’ contributions to create success for the whole.

The most successful people are those who properly arrange their mutual connection with others. If we pay attention to where our gifts can match others’ lacks, there is no doubt that our lives will be lifted by the appreciation of others for the positive effect we have on our environment. By recognizing each one’s specific offering, we become equal partners in attaining the goal, and by our mutual help we will reach the top.
This summary is written and edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1323 – Feeling Equal To Others,” 11/7/21

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