My Thoughts On Twitter 12/27/19

Dr Michael Laitman Twitter

If the group has taken on any condition for its advancement, then I may agree with them or not, but until I come to share in the group’s opinion, I will not fulfill the law of mutual guarantee, and that means I will not be aimed at spirituality, at the goal of creation, the goal of life, the Creator, who is in the center of the group.

Mutual guarantee is the iron law of the spiritual system. At every moment it returns us to bestowal, to faith above reason, to being directed at the goal, compelling us to be included in the group and to bow down before the ten. All of this is part of the law of mutual guarantee in order to become human in the system of Adam HaRishon.

I must constantly check how much I agree with the group, with the teacher, with what Kabbalists write, and in this way, direct myself toward correction with ever-greater precision. This is what correction is, in essence.

As a result of correction, the friend and Creator merge together for me into one image. I do not differentiate them from each other because my egoism is completely corrected and cannot see differences in them. All the differences that I see around me now are depicted inside of my uncorrected egoism.

To the extent I feel a lack of mutual guarantee inside me and make efforts to attain it, extend a prayer, and include myself in the group, to this extent I advance and elevate myself from the path of suffering to the path of light.

The Creator can be revealed only on the condition that a person will change and become equal to Him. Change a part of your egoism to bestowal, and in this reverse part you will feel the Creator’s actions.

With the help of the light that reforms, I constantly add a force to the corrected part at the expense of the corrupted part. All of this happens only on the condition of connection with the right environment, allowing me to advance.

The law of mutual guarantee operates in all of creation. We are inside the corrected system even now, but we do not see it because we judge from our own flaws, and we therefore see a corrupted system. We must see an increasingly corrected system, becoming more and more included in mutual guarantee. This is our whole work.

The law of mutual guarantee, my attitude to unity, determines all of my advancement, to what extent my path will be correct and straight, without loops and descents. Descent then becomes as a devil’s pinch—1 second, and we awaken and take a step forward.
I fall and awaken with great speed.

Our disagreements with the friend must be preserved—each one keeps his opinion. The most important thing for us is to attain unity, and we are glad that the Creator gave us the opportunity to be together. Between the two of us, we search for the quality of the Creator who includes both of us within: two opposites within one whole.

Mutual guarantee is the law of the whole of creation and the particular law of every person. If we correspond to this law, then we do not err and we advance along the shortest straight line toward the goal of creation. If I cease checking myself for mutual guarantee, then I will immediately stumble, fall, lose my way.

We do not replace one goal with another; they pull each other along: from love for the creatures, love for the Creator is born, and love for the Creator necessitates love for the creatures. They alternate at every degree until we no longer differentiate where the creatures are and where the Creator is. Everything becomes one whole.

Bestowal to man is more important than bestowal to the Creator. Love for the Creator emerges to the extent that we realize love for the neighbor—it comes from the upper light, which fills the corrected Kelim. All of our work lies in fulfilling the creatures.

We preserve the hatred and build a cover of love over it. We need both of them: “Love will cover all crimes”—it “covers” rather than destroys hatred or turns it into something else. The difference between love and hate must remain and then it will support darkness and light.
From Twitter, 12/27/19

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“Why Divorce Negatively Affects Men More Than Women” (KabNet)

KabNet published my new article: “Why Divorce Negatively Affects Men More Than Women

Divorce and parental separation has been associated with a range of negative outcomes affecting all those involved in the process. But why is it particularly difficult for men, as multiple studies indicate it to be?

How could men and women create a support system that will not only help the couple overcome challenges related to the split, but also help children cope with their parent’s separation?

Marriage has been directly associated with men’s health. 66% of men rely on their wives for their primary social support. Thus, divorce greatly increases a man’s sense of isolation. Also, socially isolated men have an 82% higher risk of dying from heart disease.

“66% of men rely on their wives for their primary social support. Thus, divorce greatly increases a man’s sense of isolation. Also, socially isolated men have an 82% higher risk of dying from heart disease.”

Why Is it Harder for Men to Endure Divorce?

Comparing the impact of divorce by gender, we discover that one of the reasons men find it more difficult to deal with a separation is their inability to open up and share their failures, worries, and pain from divorce with others. In comparison to women, since men are less prone to reach out for support when their family gets shattered, their chances of suffering from helplessness, stress and depression increase. In some cases, severe mental health problems arise in men that even lead to suicide. As confirmed by an investigation of the University of California, divorced men are nine times more likely than women to die by suicide. How can this be explained?

In general, factors that impair the mental and physical health of the divorced are loss of control over life, impairment of family and social sense, financial anxiety, loneliness and emptiness. All these feelings are intensified in divorced men. In addition, we can add to this difficult situation the potential for false accusations that often become part of the lawyers’ disputes over the custody of children.

There is a common misconception that it is easier for a man to live the single life after a separation, a life free of worry and commitment, while single mothers are left overwhelmed with the task of raising children alone, often dealing with most of the economic burden single-handedly. However, in practice, this picture often turns out to be unfounded. Instead of celebrating their supposed freedom, men often feel like abandoned children alone in the world, unable to pick up the pieces of their broken lives and carry on. Their confidence and self-esteem is undermined by divorce.

While in many cases women receive almost full custody of the children, fathers find themselves “divorced” from their children as well. Relentless quarrels with the ex-spouse often complicate the relationship with the children who sometimes hold a grudge against the father for leaving home, feeling distanced regardless of the compensation he might try to give them to maintain his position in their lives.

Understanding the Other Side Better

What Western society misses is that a man, despite the “macho” image he might portray to cover up his own insecurities, is almost totally dependent on the emotional support of the woman next to him and his family for a sense of well-being, much more so than most of us imagine. The wisdom of Kabbalah explains that a man by nature is fragile and vulnerable and needs a feminine influence resembling a mother figure to accompany him from childhood and throughout his life. Just as a fetus receives nourishment from its mother through the umbilical cord, a man remains in need of a woman’s nourishment in the form of support and care to continue to remain fulfilled.

Women in return should receive from men security, confidence, and total recognition for the pivotal role and contribution they play. A man needs to constantly emphasize his love and appreciation for his wife and should pamper and embrace her as much as possible to avoid losing her.

The problem is that both men and women, from an early age, receive no education on how to understand this interactive mutual support mechanism and how to use it positively for the sake of family integrity. Each partner is locked in the ego, in individual self-concern, and often misinterprets the other until the partnership is unable to endure the resulting emotional crunch and the decision is made to tear the family unit apart.

The Key to Successful Relationships

In fact, the success of a marriage does not depend on physical attraction or even on personality, as our consumerist culture would have us believe. Marital success depends on the attitude and warmth that partners provide to each other, a necessary condition for a balanced relationship.

We need to stop assuming that we know what the other loves or needs. How can we expect that two different people from two different families, with two different upbringings, would know what each other want? It is unwise to sit back and wait until one would suddenly do something positive to the other. Instead, they must proactively and openly discuss their needs and desires, and then they will realize how positive such communication is to their relationship.

If, after making all possible efforts to preserve the family unit, divorce seems to be inevitable, it is indispensable for ex-spouses to transcend their own nature and differences to build a life as friends. In such a scenario, all family members — men, women and children — will benefit from the encouraging communication and cordial relations. Everything must begin with an education that aims to develop close and positive relations.

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Faith Above Reason: Preferring Bestowal To Reception

laitman_275Faith above reason is a spiritual concept, which means that a person prefers to be in bestowal instead of reception, that is, to bestow to the Creator instead of serving one’s own egoism. This is a calculation for the benefit of the Creator and not for one’s own benefit. The entire wisdom of Kabbalah is built on the principle of faith above reason, the principle of bestowal. Bestowal is built above reception and that is why it is called faith above reason.1

Faith above reason grows through my choice to prefer bestowal over reception. The greatness of reception is imprinted in me, it is my nature. I know and feel how important it is to receive for myself—this is my entire “I.” Yet, I must find a way to cut off, to detach, my “I” from myself and attach it to the Creator in order to think about Him instead of myself and to receive pleasure from these thoughts.

I feel good when I think about the Creator because I feel that I am moving in the right direction. However, is the goal to do good to myself or is bestowal to the Creator most important? Through such exercises, I advance, gradually distancing from my I and shifting all my thoughts to the Creator.

It even becomes unimportant to me whether I feel good or bad; I do not want to think about it. After all, if I run away to the Creator to hide from evil, then it is my egoism. But to strive for Him and to ignore the good is also incorrect. I want to restrict myself and no matter whether I feel empty or fulfilled in any state, I want to adhere to the Creator so that all my thoughts and desires would be only about Him and all my actions would be directed at Him. This will be genuine bestowal to the Creator above reason, above impressions in my mind and heart; it means I have acquired faith above reason.2

If we really feel the need to turn to the Creator, we will start working on our connection. The Creator is the goal that obligates us to unite. Otherwise, why do we need to connect? Egoism, on the contrary, pushes us away from each other and says that it is better to keep our distance. We will agree to connect only out of hopelessness when we are compelled to turn to the Creator. It is as if the entire ten is locked in a tight cage and we are forced to search for the means to cry to the Creator.

This is how we need to see our state in this life without waiting for the Creator to push us into it by suffering. Let us imagine this state, discuss it between us: what are we lacking in order to turn to the Creator together, to raise a prayer, MAN? How can we connect with each other in order to feel this connection as a single point common for all of us? What should we feel in this point, what desire, what ache for the Creator is called a prayer? How can we reach such a request? Let us decide and compile such a program.3
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/3/19, The Work in Faith Above Reason

1 Minute 1:05
2 minute 4:40
3 Minute 32:20

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The Method Of Correction, Part 2

laitman_570Kabbalah—The Key to the Laws of Nature

Question: Why did nature create us as egoists and opposite to it? What is the purpose?

Answer: So that precisely because of our egoism, we become aware of how terrible we are as creatures.

The question arises: if we see that our egoism is the only obstacle toward achieving an eternal, perfect life, how can we correct it? How, with the help of the ego, can we change ourselves, society, the environment, everything?

At this point, a need emerges to actually change ourselves. There are many different methods, theories, and ideas on this topic, including religious and non-religious, mystical, Eastern, etc.

One of these methods is Kabbalah. It stands quite apart from everything else because it emerged long before their inception, 6,000 years ago. According to Kabbalah, there was a man named Adam. He was the first to comprehend the whole matrix, the whole system of nature, and he unraveled its plan, its beginning, its course, and the end.

Adam laid the foundation for the science of Kabbalah. His students were Sim, Ham, Yaphet, and others who were allegorically described in the Torah. They continued to develop this science up until Abraham in ancient Babylon.

Kabbalah speaks of how to unite above oneself, over one’s egoism. In this case, we will begin to feel the general power of nature, its overall picture. It will become clear to us that nature is eternal, perfect, infinite, and most importantly, integral and whole.

If we treat it like that, then we begin to unravel its true laws, its true form. After all, today we do not feel it. We do not really know it, and we do not really see it.
From KabTV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah,” 2/7/19

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Daily Kabbalah Lesson – 12/27/19

Questions from World Kli

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