Question: Some researchers say that the two opposites, love and hatred, are united by the  importance of feelings for an object. When I love or hate someone, that person is equally important to me. Importance gives rise to dependency and fear. A person constantly thinks about the object of their love or hatred. Do you agree with this statement?

Answer: In principle, yes. But it is difficult for me to talk about this because Kabbalah does not use such definitions. Everything is very dry and scientific in it and explicitly defined in relation to egoism.

Remark: Scientists seem to want to say that love and hatred are very similar and one easily turns into the other.

My Comment: Yes, they are very close. A person falls from one state to another and rises again.

Question: There are such concepts as unfounded love and unfounded hatred. If you have done something bad to me, it is clear that I hate you. What is unfounded hatred?

Answer: Unfounded hatred is a state when a person cannot determine the reason for their hatred. In fact, there is a reason. Either it is inherent in nature itself instinctively, like a cat with a mouse, or it is somehow acquired. But it does exist.

The reason comes from nature itself. A person cannot explain why they hate another person, but they do. It is the same with love.

There is always a reason why you love someone. For example, you like the color of a person’s eyes or something else. You may not know why you like him or her, it is just that these tastes are embedded in you.

This does not depend on any physical actions: yours in relation to him or her and his or hers in relation to you. You simply see a person and you are attracted to them.
[275249]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/23/20

Related Material:
“Why Do We Hate?”
What Is Hatred?
Hatred Is The Beginning Of Love

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: There are no pure-blooded peoples in the world anymore. Since Babylon, for 4,000 years, everyone has practically mixed up. Yet, we have been unable to prevent nationalism and racism. What is the reason for this phenomenon? No matter how hard we try, nothing helps, not even mixed marriages.

Answer: No, nothing helps because we should not just mix but should rise above our differences to the next level where these differences do not exist and we also do not exist in a material form at all.

That is, we must completely change our personal egoism that separates us from each other into altruism, bestowal, and love. We need to rise above ourselves. Then, it will happen.

Question: Is racial rejection a genetically determined phenomenon or is it just a consequence of one’s upbringing?

Answer: No, this is not just a consequence of one’s upbringing. Education is also a consequence. In our root, we are divided into four parts and therefore cannot be at peace with each other without correcting ourselves.

Question: There are several reasons for racism: the stratification of society into rich and poor, the artificial mixing of different races without prior preparation, the detachment of people, the forced isolation of people during the pandemic, as well as conflicts in different countries.

You write that racism arises from the desire to enjoy when it is bad for others. Is this the reason for it?

Answer: Of course. In this way, we raise ourselves above others. It is always in the enjoyment of feeling superior to others that we experience our highest egoistic destiny. Therefore, racism is the highest form of egoism.

Question: As our desires grow, the hatred between people constantly increases. We see that the more developed the society, the more hatred there is between people. Can you explain what could cause some more or less adequate feelings between nations and who could make this happen?

Answer: I believe it can only be a science about creation and predetermination because it would raise everyone to the same root. Only by moving toward it, can we achieve unity between ourselves.
[275145]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/14/20

Related Material:
Overcome Prejudice
Xenophobia: The Desire For Self-Preservation
Rise Above Disagreements

Filed under: Crisis, Education, Globalization - No Comments →

Question: For people who are used to the rapid flow of life on the Internet, reality seems too boring. Do you agree with this statement?

Answer: It depends on where everything flows. Is it to inundate us with tons of new, diverse, and unnecessary data? Is it to, every day, build huge repositories of all kinds of information on the Internet that no one needs?! For what?

You could erase absolutely everything that humanity has had until now. In order to behave correctly and come to the goal of creation, we do not need any of this.

However, these are not wasted years because on their basis we have come to the conclusion that we must change ourselves.

Nevertheless, all positive changes will only arise through our true desire for the right life and the appearance of the forces that can form it from above, from within nature.
[275057]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 7/10/20

Related Material:
Everything Stems From Egoism
Replacement For Physical Contact
The Way To Ultimate Communication

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: Moral norms are constantly changing. For example, chauvinism and Nazism have been replaced by tolerance; a tolerant attitude toward sexual and national minorities. Or, if earlier on, divorce had been considered something shameful, today it can even be honorable since it is believed that one may gain independence and so on.

Are there any principles that should remain constant regardless of the culture of society and the passing of time?

Answer: Yes. These are principles of correct interaction between people, when they form a single community in which everyone feels like an integral part of the overall interaction. They discover their perfect, eternal state within it. They must live in this feeling. This is the goal of their development.

Question: Could you list a few principles that should not be changed regardless of human development, culture, and the passing of time?

Answer: There is only one such principle: “love your neighbor as yourself.” Nothing else. In practice, only this principle leads us to the creation and maintenance of the system of our interconnection within which we reveal eternal and perfect life.

This is why we must realize this principle among us by getting together in tens and in small groups. This is already the practice of practical Kabbalah, how to draw the special energy called the upper light that can bring us closer to each other, explain why we are opposite to each other, and help us learn how to rise above this opposition.

Initially, we all are disconnected because we have gone through the so-called split. Now, we must achieve rapprochement with each other. In the difference between connection and disconnection, we will begin to feel ourselves as existing in the eternal flow of life.

Comment: It turns out to be a paradox. If you were to go out now and ask people if they follow the principle “love your neighbor,” almost everyone would say that they do.

My Response: So, it is necessary to explain to people what we mean by the words, “love your neighbor as yourself” and why this principle is given to us in the Torah, as well as why everyone flaunts that he can fulfill it, but in fact no one observes it, etc.

Question: Do you think that all other moral principles are based upon this principle?

Answer: All of them are just a particular case of love your neighbor.

Question: Does it turn out that if I follow this principle, I will offer my seat to others on public transportation and will help people out for free?

Answer: Proceeding from this, you will always be kind toward others and will never be able to do any harm to your neighbor. After all, if you love a person, how can you harm him?
[274795]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/9/20

Related Material:
Moral Conventions And Laws of Nature
Reflections On Ethics
The Greater Purpose Of A Play

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: Unlike simple customs and habits (i.e., birthday celebrations, weddings, send-offs to the army, and various other rituals), moral norms are not simply established due to the generally accepted order, but have an ideological justification in the ideas of a person.

What do you think should be the basis for moral principles in society?

Answer: Any moral norm should be based upon the fact that, at every moment of its development, society should be aimed toward mutual merger, love, and friendship, the achievement of an absolute, complete, integral, and common desire called the soul.

The goal of nature is to raise a person and, then all of nature to the level of eternity and perfection. A good relationship between us is a means to reach this goal. After all, if there were no such goal, there would be no need for love for one’s neighbor nor for any morals.
[274683]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/9/20

Related Material:
Natural Laws And Legal Norms
Moral Conventions And Laws of Nature
What Defines Morality?

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: The fear of expressing your thoughts, emotions, and feelings arises from the fact that a person does not know how others will react. He is afraid of being rejected or ridiculed. What advice would you give to such people?

Answer: This is ordinary human egoism that wants to look right, developed, something special, friendly, well disposed. As a rule, a person is afraid that he or she will be criticized, rejected, etc.

But in general, if we do some special training before the opening of the course of integral education, or just start it by carefully introducing people to it from afar, I think that everything will be easy in the first lessons.

And then everything will become natural. After a couple of sessions, they will feel completely relaxed with each other, and there will be no difference between them. They will understand that they are dealing with completely new properties, deeply hidden in them and not related to any earthly features or levels of development.
[274840]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/14/20

Related Material:
Guide For Round Tables, Part 12
Learn To Listen To Each Other
Escaping From The “Cage” Of Stereotypes

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: Harvard Kennedy School Professor Ronald Ferguson coauthored a book about raising successful children, The Formula: Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children. He and coauthor journalist Tatsha Robertson provide “The 8 Roles of Good Parents.”

The first role is “the early learning partner.” The parent engages in trying to interest the child in learning and making learning and problem solving fun even before the child begins school.

What does it mean to be a learning partner to a child?

Answer: When a parent speaks, he or she introduces and explains to the child in advance these sensations, these relationships.

Question: Does he at the same time encourage the child to be the first in the class?

Answer: No. It’s not about competition, it’s about the correct attitude.

Question: What kind of attitude should it be?

Answer: To instill the appeal of knowledge in a child.

Comment: The second role is called “the flight engineer.” This is a parent who controls the environment of a child and intervenes when something goes wrong.

My Response: This is natural. The environment determines a person and their development.

Question: Can a parent step in and move a child to a different environment if something is wrong?

Answer: Definitely!

Question: Is this not coercion?

Answer: No. This is an adjustment that must be made from above.

Question: What if a child likes it there?

Answer: It does not matter what he likes.

Question: To such an extent? Almost forcibly? Do you just move him or her to another school?

Answer: Yes.

Question: What kind of environment should I move the child to?

Answer: The one that helps the child to develop and does not limit or create any false ideals before him.

Question: What should be the ideal of the correct environment?

Answer: Free, extensively developed, friendly, not restricted in any way.

Question: Is this what an environment should be? Does this include teachers, classes, and friends?

Answer: Of course, everything.

Comment: The third role is “the fixer.” A parent ensures that they child has all that is needed to succeed, that no opportunity to improve the child’s life will be lost.

My Response: To do this, you need to educate a parent first.

Question: What are the main opportunities for improving a child’s life?

Answer: Society, environment. Nothing else.

Comment: The fourth role is “The revealer.” A parent-revealer expands the child’s view of the world by showing them the world and opportunities available to them and takes them to museums, libraries, and exhibitions.

My Response: That’s right. I was raised that way. My father took me to the movie theater all the time. He was a big movie fan. We had a movie theater where they only had movies about artists, musicians, and great people. We went to all these movies once a week.

Question: Did this expand your view of the world?

Answer: Of course! Since then, I have not seen these films about great artists, musicians, and people of art.

Comment: The fifth role is “the philosopher.” Parents help their child find purpose by asking deep questions about life and answering them. Do you think it’s right for a parent to be such a philosopher?

My Response: It is necessary to awaken such questions in a child that puzzle the child and that he or she tries to answer somehow.

Question: What questions would you awaken in a child?

Answer: It depends on the age and the character of a child. It’s not easy.

Of course, questions about the basis of the universe, about life, about nature that surrounds us.

Question: Can we ask a child such questions as “What was I born for? What is the meaning of life?” Or is it too early for him and we should not do this?

Answer: I do not know. This should be done very carefully. I do not want to advise.

In principle, children have these questions in childhood. Then they forget. “What do I live for, where do I come from, what am I for, what am I?” And so on. This is still a pre-hormonal development. Then the hormones start kicking in, and everything ends at that.

Comment: The sixth role is “the model.” These parents define important values for themselves and instill them in their children.

My Response: I am not sure about that. My parents’ values were to make me a musician. It was, of course, terrible. I did not appreciate this at all and could not appreciate this. I did not like to work mechanically on myself, to play scales for five or six hours a day and more things like that. This dryness killed me. I could not stand it and did everything I could to break away.

Question: In general, is it correct that parents define important values for themselves and instill them in their children?

Answer: That’s how it turns out! There is nothing you can do.

Question: Does it mean that the main thing is to educate parents so that the correct values are instilled in them? And then the children will follow them.

Answer: Yes, that’s right!

Question: The eighth role is “the GPS navigational voice.” The voice of such parents continues to sound in the child’s head even after they have left home. What do you think about that?

Answer: That’s right. This remains, and this is very important. However, it’s just a navigator. Therefore, it is necessary to check the values that parents have and that they want to instill in their child.

Question: In other words, do we need to check this “navigator”?

Answer: Yes. This is a problem today.

Question: Are these values basically all egoistic by and large?

Answer: Of course. We need to educate parents. Take all these values and instill them in parents, and let them educate themselves with this.
[274234]
From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 9/14/20

Related Material:
How To Raise Children
Who Should Be Educated First?
Education From Infancy

Filed under: Children, Education, News - No Comments →

Question: Is the very meeting of future parents in our world predetermined or not?

Answer: It is predetermined. It was no accident that I met this person.

Question: Why is this done? Why do couples connect in this way?

Answer: There are no coincidences in the world. No coincidences at all! As it is said in The Master and Margarita: “The brick is neither here nor there… it never merely falls on someone’s head from out of nowhere.”

Question: If so, is the birth of a particular child who will be born predetermined?

Answer: Everything is absolutely predetermined until the end of all time. There is nothing new.

Question: Can we say that there is a good time for conceiving a child?

Answer: That doesn’t matter either, and it also does not depend on people. It is all arranged from above, and so it happens. In fact, a person does not choose anything.

Question: But when parents decide they want to have a child, what should they think about?

Answer: That they want to make a good person who would be useful to the world and would enjoy the fact that he is beneficial to the world.

Question: What is “to benefit the world”?

Answer: To bring people together.

Comment: Imagine giving this task to parents!

My Response: They think about it in the act of conception. As it is written in Ketuvim, Job 3:2: “Would the day in which I was to be born be lost, and the night when one said, ‘A man has impregnated.'”

Comment: Usually a person thinks more about himself, so that there is a good, kind, warm, beloved, healthy child. Think about him more.

My Response: No. By this you do not make a child but an animal. And if you think about how he will be in the world as a person, for the world, then you make a person.

Question: What if a couple cannot conceive a child, but they really want to?

Answer: Try as much as you can. You cannot do anything. Even today it still depends on higher providence.

Question: And what will help more here: going to healers or doctors?

Answer: We must visit doctors, we must do everything possible.

Question: And at the same time ask the upper one to help?

Answer: Of course, all together.

Question: When will He hear this request?

Answer: This is unknown to us. As much as people strive to do good to each other and with the Creator, the closer they will be to the fulfillment of this desire, although this does not guarantee it.

Comment: It is not very clear: “good to each other and with the Creator.” Explain this point, please.

My Response: To act between each other as it was originally established by the Creator.

Question: How is this established?

Answer: Everything is built on goodness.

Question: How should expectant parents behave during pregnancy?

Answer: We must be considerate with each other, especially with a woman. And try so that a woman during pregnancy has good thoughts, music, readings. In general, to influence her with positive and more elevated emotions and knowledge. All this influences the child very much.

Question: What kind of music would you choose?

Answer: I personally support classical music because it is the most proper, the most complete. Of course, not heavy but soft classics.

Question: What should a woman during pregnancy think about?

Answer: It is written about this in the Torah that a woman only thinks about the one who is in her, who was conceived and grows in her. Only about him. Nature has already foreseen this, so there is no need to interfere with it.

Question: What is the most critical time of pregnancy?

Answer: As a rule, the first few months. Then the foundation of the child is laid.

Question: When should the child be handed over to the mother?

Answer: You must immediately place the child on her so that he feels that he is still connected with the mother.

Question: Does this give him more security?

Answer: Both to her and to him. There must be a connection. It is very important.

Question: What does mother’s milk mean for baby’s growth?

Answer: Mother’s milk is not necessarily from his mother, it can be from another woman. Although, it is preferable for the child to receive milk from his mother. And this milk is the closest substance to the child, carrying so many elements we do not even suspect.

Question: What does the baby get with mother’s milk?

Answer: It is impossible to express. The upper light, called Ohr Hassadim, light of mercy, he receives from above through his mother’s milk.

Question: How does a mother communicate with a breastfeeding baby?

Answer: She talks to him through it. He feels her through her chest and she feels him through her chest. This is an amazing mechanism in both animals and humans.

Question: How long should a mother breastfeed her baby?

Answer: It is generally recommended up to two years.

Comment: Nobody follows this.

My Response: I know that no one follows it. But, according to the spiritual law, breastfeeding should be up to two years.

Question: And if you must go to work as it is today?

Answer: Well, everyone does, that is true. Who cares about some spiritual or natural laws?

Comment: You are saying that everything is predetermined and all actions are predetermined.

My Response: If you ruin your life, do not blame nature.

Question: So, we ruined life so much? We send mothers to work in six months, a year, and so on.

Answer: Of course.

Question: What needs to be done to make things right?

Answer: To make it right—the woman should not work at all.

Comment: This, of course, is impossible in our times.

My Response: Why? Why is it bad if only the man works and earns enough for his family, and this would be enough for the family to live normally, calmly, quietly?

Question: Tell me, if the mother is annoyed or after a quarrel with the father, should she feed or not feed the child at that moment?

Answer: This is not good. The child will feel this very much on himself, and therefore, such states are absolutely undesirable! A woman must be protected, isolated from any negative, unwanted influences.

Question: That is, all this enters the child, both irritation and hatred?

Answer: Of course. All this will creep into the child and manifest in negative consequences.

Question: Does the infant generally feel what is happening at home in parental relationships?

Answer: Of course. He feels everything. Everything is felt by him “through the air” even if it is in the next house, in another city. All of this is transmitted. He is very sensitive. The mother for him is like a receiver that he listens to and perceives even if she does not say anything to him. But everything that affects the mother, he feels it all.

Question: It turns out that the mother is like a sixth sense for him?

Answer: Of course. It seems to us that he came out of the mother and the umbilical cord was cut off. Nothing is cut.
[274965]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 10/5/20

Related Material:
Sex, Love, Test Tubes And Nature
Who Should Be Educated First?
Love Will Make A Child Smarter

Filed under: Children, Education, Man and Woman - No Comments →

Comment: There is something called xenophobia. It is the desire for self-preservation based on dislike, intolerance, and prejudice toward people who are different, with a different skin color, extra weight, short height, etc. Our brain immediately identifies them as strangers.

There is a law of similarity of form according to which people who are similar attract each other and opposites repel. We say that we must follow the laws of nature.

My Response: No, the law of nature is not necessarily to be closer to those who are like you. In most cases, it is necessary to connect with those who are different from you in order to create a broader field of social relations.

Therefore, we see among biological connections of all kinds that they need to be combined with others, sometimes very different from one another. This leads to an even greater diversity in nature.

Therefore, you will not only cross redheads with redheads, tall ones with tall ones, etc., which can only lead to incorrect consequences.

Question: So, what is this law of similarity of form, like attracts like?

Answer: This refers to inner similarity when people are attracted to each other and feel the same aspirations.

In Kabbalah, this is the most important quality; we come together in groups with the intention of reaching a special goal, a non-corporeal one, which cannot be determined by any standard, material conventions.

People with different skin color, those who are tall, short, fat, or thin can take part in this process. The main thing is that everyone should have the desire to connect with others by rising above their own nature. They begin to connect in a completely different way and with qualities that are inconsequential in this world.

In other words, when we talk about similarity, we mean the similarity of people’s goals, but their qualities and character traits remain different. The greater the variety, the more we arrive at similarity.
[275005]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 10/14/20

Related Material:
Xenophobia: The Desire For Self-Preservation
Through Similarity Of Properties
Fear—Agent Of Development

Filed under: Education - No Comments →

Question: Are there situations when it is worth following just one person—a leader and not a team?

Answer: Yes. If we want to achieve a higher goal, then we cannot rely on the opinion of the crowd because by remaining a crowd with many opinions, it cannot produce anything special or higher than itself. We see what comes out of it. All this is invented only to fool people.

If we want to rise above our state we do not need a crowd. We need to train people, even that same crowd, to be a collective that can rise above themselves in faith above knowledge, that is, to the next level of development, sensing the creation.

Question: But in order to rise to this state, it is necessary to annul personal opinions and combine the efforts to create a unified desire. Why can’t we just add our opinions and not annul them?

Answer: No. If we do thus, we will not reach faith above knowledge. Each of us must humble ourselves in relation to the collective, and then we will all come to a state, where in our union, we become higher than each of us individually or together as a sum.

A completely different principle works here. I work with my egoism, raise society in my eyes, and accept it as something sacred. Despite the fact that I am right as an individual, I accept the opinion of society above my own because it is a society! I understand that there is a common strength, a common opinion, in it.

This is not the opinion of the crowd. By w anting to be connected together, we are all inside each other, each annulling oneself. Then we create such a state where everybody equalizes oneself with the others. Then we begin to feel the next level of our development, each from the point of annulment. This is called faith above knowledge.
[274073]
From KabTV’s “Communication Skills” 9/25/20

Related Material:
Is Polling People Effective For Decision Making?
Different Levels Of Decision Making
The Wisdom Of The Crowd And The Wisdom Of Kabbalah

Filed under: Education - No Comments →