Question: What should I do when I see that a friend is harming the group? Is it an indication of my lack of correction or that he is really harming the group?
Answer: If a friend was very dedicated before and suddenly changes, we have to help him. Of course, we mustn’t throw him out now since he is wounded by his evil inclination. We have to take care of him and to lift him. We can take him to a bar and have a beer together, go for a walk, or have a social gathering with some friends. We can ask him to do some kind of work that no one but him can do, and so we have to turn to him and really ask for his help. This means that we should try to get close to him in different ways, to evoke him and to warm him up. It’s very helpful to turn to his family for help.
We should try to do whatever we can, even if he speaks against the group. We should understand that this may be a temporary state of mind and should treat it patiently and wait until we see that there is no choice and only then break off from him, although it’s always a great problem if it’s an old friend who has been in the group for years. We should always rely on the group’s opinion and not on a personal opinion since you can never count on yourself when it comes to such matters.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/22/13, Writings of Rabash