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New Life 1312 – How To Establish Good Communication Between Parents And Their Adolescent Children
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz
We are all egoists and if we want to communicate, we need to adapt to each other by making mutual concessions. Building a family connection requires that each member of the family understands human nature. Parents should consult the kids about their family relations, which will help the kids to cope with conflict and reach agreements. Teens shouldn’t be suffocated or pushed to share their feelings. They need limits, freedom, and guidance. They need to know that they always have a protective shelter and a warm, loving home in order to feel secure.
Parents also need to set an example by showing the kids how they cope with anger and calm themselves down. Parents also need to show the kids that they don’t always think alike and that, sometimes, one of them identifies with the kids. We need to make children aware that the role of the family is to help them to grow successfully.
From KabTV’s “New Life 1312 – How To Establish Good Communication Between Parents And Their Adolescent Children,” 7/11/21
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My Response: The fact is that the Temple was also a place for studying—where people from all over the country gathered. When a person would come to the Temple, he had to bring sacrifices with him and some of them were used to prepare food.
These dishes were placed on common tables and anyone could come and take part in the meal.
A Kabbalistic meal is usually attended by those who, with its help, want to ascend spiritually. They understand what they are coming together for; it is huge internal work, a great effort.
From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 7/9/21
The 15th of Av is a special holiday called “The Day of Love” because love is the ultimate goal of our corrections. It is said that there has never been a happier and better day than this. And we are not talking about earthly love between a man and a woman. This is the day of everyone’s love for everyone and for the upper force that also envelops us with its love.
This has a completely different meaning. The day of love is not even a day but a state to which we come after destruction and problems. And when we turn to the Creator for help and with His help establish unity and love between us, this state continues forever.
In the Mishnah it is written that on the 15th of Av the girls would put on white dresses and go out into the garden and sing and dance in circles and the young men would come to choose their brides. However, we are not talking about young people but about aspirations of our soul, about the power of reception and the power of bestowal, which we must try to unite in order to come to their unification and the birth of a new world.
If we want to achieve correction, we must unite the two opposite forces so that the force of reception and the force of bestowal work together and give birth to a new state, a new generation created by the union of the right and left, masculine and feminine principles. It is the woman who gives birth to a new state, a new generation, and leads to the correction of the world. The color white symbolizes the property of the upper force, full surrender, pure, good intention, and openness. And all this takes place in orchards where grapes and fruits ripen, which testifies to the renewal of life.
Before this, we believed that we were living, but it was not life but continuous suffering. We considered it life only out of hopelessness. But now we really understand what life of love, union, and devotion to each other and the Creator is. And now we all unite with each other and with the upper force into one whole, one Kli, and then we really feel that we are beginning to live.
Everyone is looking for the opportunity to bestow, to get closer, to love, to give to everyone impartially, without any boundaries. So we come to the union from which a new life is born; from two forces, right and left, a third is born—the middle line, which opens the heavens to us and allows us to see life at a perfect spiritual level.
From KabTV’s “The World” 7/20/21
My new article on Linkedin “The Danger in Our False Perception”
Today, when we look at the world, we see only one force: egoism. We think that everything runs only according to everyone’s efforts to raise themselves to the top of the heap, to be the hunter and not the hunted, the predator and not the prey. We, humanity, have reached the top of the pyramid, and from the zenith, we’re trying to find what more we can take. To achieve this, we learn, become more sophisticated, and develop technology, science, social structures, and everything we have developed in order to succeed in this world.
If we continue on our selfish trend, the horrible summer we are experiencing throughout the world will be the best summer of the rest of our lives. We don’t have to continue on this route; have another option: to bury the hatchet and make peace with nature and with one another, and realize that we don’t have to fight to win a good life; we only need to work together.
But now that we’ve achieved all that, we find that something is still amiss. We realize that we have gone too far. We have taken egoism to the extreme, and we have destroyed our planet. Instead of supporting us, our own home is caving in on us, releasing torrential rains that flood entire countries, bursting in flames that incinerate titanic forests, and launch ash to the highest levels of the atmosphere. Siberia’s frozen lands, once thought to be lifeless, are melting and discharging viruses and bacteria for which our immune system has no antibodies. And the animal kingdom, which we believed we had subdued, is infesting us with viruses and other bugs that arrest our entire global activity.
With the heyday behind us, and the threat of nature’s vengeance ahead, we seem to have one choice: Stop trying to dominate nature and start cooperating with it. This is the time to realize that nature isn’t run solely by egoism, but rather by two forces, egoism and altruism, which balance each other out and generate the dynamic harmony that enables the creation of life and evolution. Now is the time for us to realize that there is no hatred in nature but acceptance and inclusion of everyone into a larger whole that, in turn, sustains all of life.
If we develop a considerate, accepting approach to all of nature, including to all people, we will discover that this is how nature truly operates and we will be able to operate likewise. Currently, our own egoism hides the truth from us, since if we see reality for what it is, we will agree to relinquish egoism, and no egoist wants to be relinquished.
Yet, if we continue on our selfish trend, the horrible summer we are experiencing throughout the world will be the best summer of the rest of our lives. We don’t have to continue on this route; have another option: to bury the hatchet and make peace with nature and with one another, and realize that we don’t have to fight to win a good life; we only need to work together.
My new article on Linkedin “How to Exit the Pandemic in a Split World”
Covid-19 has split the world between those who strongly support the need for massive vaccination to tackle the pandemic, and those who vehemently oppose mandatory inoculation and restrictions, taking to the streets of Europe and America to express their discontent. As the Delta variant spreads across the world, in the U.S. alone, an average of 43,000 new cases are reported every day, a 65% increase in one week. How can we ever exit the pandemic in such a divided scenario?
It is written, “I dwell among my own people” (2 Kings 4:13)—a statement that means: I am part of the society I live among, and I share the public’s frame of mind. If the vaccine is acceptable to most people and recommended by health officials, then I must go out and get vaccinated. I do not disengage from the people and do not consider myself more of an expert than the experts.
This is how I chose and will continue to choose to act, and I will certainly not determine choices for my acquaintances or students, nor do I have the authority to do so. Every person is free to make an independent decision, and I respect and accept with great love each one and the choices everyone makes.
It makes sense that there are concerns and objections—anxiety from the unknown and fears from the risks of failure—and other doubts arising from people involved in the medical field. Such voices have been heard and have resonated in the public space from the day the plague broke out. However, we will not come to a unanimous conclusion from within the swirl of endless rumors.
The sages wrote to us in black and white about a spiritual law, “It was taught in the school of Rabbi Ishmael about the verse, ‘He shall cause him to be thoroughly healed’ (Ex. 21:19). From this we learn that permission has been given to the physician to heal.” (Babylonian Talmud, Berachot, 60a). The supreme force of nature heals through a representative within society, the doctor.
It is true that today’s medicine has fundamental flaws. This is also true about every other system we have built, because when the relationships between human beings are broken and the connections between us are selfish, society itself is broken. Naturally, this breakdown also affects the systems themselves. And yet, despite all the negative and positive things that are part of the medical field, it is nature acting through it in order to heal.
Medicine is neither better nor worse than the human beings who rely on it. Doctors are not angels and the health systems are not heaven, but with all the shortcomings that we have, the medical situation is still the service we need. In other words, current spoiled medicine dresses like a glove on our spoiled society.
If we were better, then we would be healed from this Covid plague by more natural forces, or we would find more creative solutions. But we are not corrected. Everyone can see that humanity is a society that is eating itself from within. People behave badly towards each other. We are locked within ourselves with self-interested calculations, ignoring the fact that we are not alone, that we are all connected and interdependent. So unfortunately, we cannot wait for a cure until everything within human society works properly. In the meantime, we have to recover from such diseases, and the available solutions are dressed in matter, in chemistry, in vaccines.
If we make a change for the better in society—if we become a more supportive, loving, considerate, close, healthy society—then physical medicine will also change for the better. But it will never happen the other way around. Medicine will not change for the better until we change.
Then, in every area and every situation in our lives, when we become more corrected, our world will also be more corrected. The plagues will disappear, the air will be cleansed, the water will clear, volcanoes will calm down, hurricanes and other hard forces will subside. It all depends on our inner state, on our relationships with one another.
Michael Laitman, On Quora: “Why is so much of the world’s food bad in quality?“
Our food cannot be of a good and natural sort because we strive to feed the entire world, billions of people. As a result, we are compelled to develop different genetic forms so that our food will not spoil quickly, and despite being separated from nature, will taste similar to natural food. This is why most of our food contains different genetic additives, and much of its flavors and smells are artificial.
As a result of this, we also observe an accelerated growth of the new generation. Why does it grow so fast, with different deviations, and differ so much from the previous generation? It is because we eat food with several genetic additives and alterations. On the other hand, however, unfortunately we have no other solution. We are obliged to act in such a way in order to feed and deliver unspoiled food to billions of people.
We have no way out until humanity will change its approach to life, so that we will take more care of ourselves, of the value of our lives instead of pursuing how to increase our earnings through so much of our activities. We will then be able to stop genetics from participating in the preparation of our food. Precisely the transformation of human consciousness from egoism to the general benefit of society will also lead to changes in the area of preparing delicious and healthy food. As usual, the human ego is the root of the problem in terms of the food we eat, and also the unhealthy, harmful and toxic products so many of us advertise to each other. Behind such activity is the desire to profit at the expense of others.
Based on a Q&A with Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman on September 9, 2006. Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
My new article on Linkedin “Where Is Our Survival Instinct?”
Which is stronger, the survival instinct or the hunting instinct? In the animal kingdom, this question is simple: The survival instinct overshadows all other instincts and fully dominates the behavior of animals. When there is a forest fire, natural enemies flee side by side and do not touch each other. Their survival instinct suppresses their hunting instincts and everyone understands that now is the time to run. The time for hunting will come only once the immediate danger is gone.
With humans, things get a little trickier. We want to survive, but we also want to dominate, to rule. In many cases, we want it more than life itself. Think of the risks people take for fame, how they risk themselves and (mainly) others in the battlefield, and you will see that for humans, life comes second when fame or power are concerned. We use any opportunity to trample them on our way to the top of the heap. When a common danger threatens people, there will always be those who take advantage of the fact that people are busy fleeing from the danger and are unaware of the danger lurking for them from other people.
It does not have to be a physical danger. People may take advantage of natural disasters to make a fortune out of other people’s misery. Even in the midst of this pandemic, countries and corporations are taking advantage of their technological and economic powers to profiteer at the expense of others. It is obvious that this attitude will turn against them, since any place where the virus can spread will eventually become a source of a new strain, but governments cannot see beyond their immediate profit, and all of us suffer as a result.
This callous exploitation is human nature, and the sooner we acknowledge it, the sooner we can begin to change it. If we don’t, the future blows, the outcomes of our misconduct toward each other, will still teach us how to be considerate, but the lessons will be far more painful and costly both economically, and in human lives.
Either way, we will eventually learn that in a connected reality, where everyone depends on everyone else, nothing can be more senseless than to act selfishly. Our sages, who realized that we are interdependent thousands of years ago, wrote about it in the Jerusalem Talmud. In Masechet Nedarim (9:4) they write, “[Suppose] one is cutting meat, and the knife descends into his hand; would he consider avenging his hand and cutting his other hand for cutting the first? So is this matter … the rule is that one does not take revenge against one’s neighbor, for it is as though he is taking revenge against his own body.”
Answer: A meal is a great action. Even the fact that animals feed together indicates that they are getting closer together and trust each other.
Even more so for people who are much more cunning and further apart from each other. When they sit at the table together, or one invites the other, or both have a meal together, it indicates that they have the intention to get closer at least temporarily.
Therefore, for all nations, all cultures, a meal is a certain connection between people no matter how many—two, three, or even up to a thousand. On the other hand, we know from Kabbalistic sources that when it comes to coming closer together, to connection, to something joyful, or even not quite joyful but especially solemn and significant, there is always a meal arranged.
In Kabbalah, a meal represents receiving the upper abundance from the Creator. Since He is the source of all living things, all intake of food is associated with turning to the Creator. Therefore, before the meal, during the meal, and after the meal, it is customary to turn to the Creator with a special appeal so that the very connection of people with everything that surrounds and is included in the meal will have a good result, a success.
Therefore, we always arrange a meal when we are happy, even not very happy, that is, when we want to celebrate a special state. However, usually the meal symbolizes something cheerful and pleasant. For example: a meal in honor of a child being born, his thirteenth birthday, an engagement, a wedding, and so on.
In general, meals accompany us in all good times. However, even if a person dies, his relatives also arrange a meal. Of course, it is no longer solemn, not cheerful, but still, it is necessary to pay tribute to the deceased.
From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 7/9/21
Answer: Kabbalah teaches that celestial bodies and many other things are only indicators of the impact of the upper forces on us.
Certain forces control the motion of the planets and thus impact our fate. And we, by the movement of the planets, think that it is actually the force that influences us, let’s say, the moon. No. It is the upper force that controls the moon.
Therefore, by studying Kabbalah, we gain access to the real upper force that manages our fate and not the lifeless celestial bodies. By themselves, they do nothing.
It is said that Kabbalists are above the stars. That is, they deal with the source of the light, the upper force that manages the celestial and the earthly actions, objects and phenomena, and so it seems to us that they determine our fate. This mistake stems from the past and goes back to the Pharaohs with their pyramids and priests.
From KabTV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah” 4/28/19