Question: Why is it so important for a person understand that he is not above nature but within it?

Answer: Because that is how he will agree to change himself and not nature, his environment. Until now, we have forced upon nature whatever comes to us.

Now, comes the response from nature, from human society, and we discover that we are cannot control anything, that we are weak, and the main thing, that we don’t understand what is happening.

We discover that we are not wiser than nature and are not above it. It is a paradox, on what basis do people, who is a product of nature, developing from the levels of the still, vegetative, and animate like some monkey, suddenly leap over his head and announce that he controls nature.

Who is a person to determine that he is above all of nature? He simply doesn’t see that he is managed by nature. We are intentionally made to think this way. It turns out that, for thousands of years, we lived innocently in an illusion. We thought that we managed nature. We evolved, hoping that we could develop without limits. We supposed that we were allowed to take and exploit everything that there is in nature, rebuilding nature.

For the first time, in our thousands-years history, we are beginning to understand that this was a serious mistake. We are discovering that we are managed and that there is a program for the development of humanity called the program of evolution, which is above us. We are within the program and are developing in accordance with it.

Now, our development has reached a state in which we are linked inextricably to all parts of nature, all parts of humanity, the world of the still, vegetative, and animate. The system is locked, and we are discovering that we are under the control of the program of nature. We are within a computer that is processing us, and we don’t know what to do. If we want to feel good (after all, we were created to feel good and bad), we need to accommodate ourselves to that computer program all the time. We need to accommodate ourselves to it in all areas: in family life, in the education of children, in social life, in education, in the economy, and in industry.

This is a completely new perception that didn’t exist in the world before, and it requires us to learn the higher program and how we can accommodate ourselves to it. IN addition, if we don’t do this, then we simply will cease to exist.

Some of the people already are beginning to understand that we are within a system of laws that we do not know. We receive such an illumination as a result of blows. There is no ruler who is ready to rule today. It makes no difference if this is a president or a prince; all control is slipping away between their fingers. They still are trying to control with force like before, but they are not succeeding.

Today, there is no power in this kind of control. Its time has passed! Control no longer comes from above to be carried out below. Rather, the success of society depends on every person, in the relationships among the common people.
[131191]
From the 4^th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/27/14, Writings of Baal HaSulam

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Question: If there is some kind of problem in cooperation between the partners in a family, is it worthwhile to include the child as a judge in their relationship?

Answer: Leo Tolstoy said, “Happy families are all alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way” (Anna Karenina). After all, we are talking about human psychology, and here it is impossible to give any clear general directions, conditions, or rules.

Later, once the family stabilizes its integral mutual cooperation, there will be equality among all the members of the family , confirming that all happy families are alike. But the miserable ones are different.

Question: How would problems be solved through a family council? First examine them, then talk with each other about how good we are, and then look for ways to solve them?

Answer: It is necessary to try everything. After the parents have demonstrated a mutual integral relationship to a child, against his will, he becomes “cooked” in the integral pot. Then it is possible to bring him into this process gradually. The parents themselves will feel when, on what level, under what conditions, and in what aspects it is possible to bring him in as a third party. Also, this should be done gradually so that it isn’t begun with deep internal discussions about the purpose of life, but a discussion about small daily problems, for example, about where to spend vacation or other questions close to a child.

Question: Suppose that the parents dream of building a vacation home outside the city. Is it possible to discuss this with the child?

Answer: Certainly, gather the entire family together, present the project, and discuss the details. A child who is involved with the architectural design will begin to consider how he can help in this and begin to offer his own ideas.

However, we must be very careful that he is excited about your architectural ideas, that he will not lose his taste for the discussion itself, that he will be integrated with them as part of a complete integral unit, and won’t just begin imagining his drawings. The goal must always be up front and remain the main thing, and your communication and unity with as a threesome is just a tool.
[131205]
From KabTV’s “Conversations with Michael Laitman” 12/11/13

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Question: Why do I need a family?

Answer: It is no accident that the family is in crisis today. This should prompt us to check and study our life critically. As a result, we should come to the conclusion that the whole world should be like one family.

Throughout the world, a crisis of the family is taking place. And it will be more intensified as long as we do not decide that the general and individual must be equal.

That is, we need to take care of one large family in the whole world, to unite all the billions of people into one family. Only then can we understand the principles of how to build our individual family and how these families should be connected with each other.

We have to go through a crisis in order to realize that we need a new ideal approach, integral and global. We will hold on to the family not because of convenience and not because of the food and customs we are used to from childhood.

The family will receive an additional higher value because we will establish good relations in it and between families, bringing them together in an increasingly extensive family, community. And because of this, we will advance to a new life, to the revelation of the upper force of nature between us.

A man is connected to his wife through their children, habits, debts, and household. But now we need to feel that we are connected with all other families in the same way: by shared debt, advantages and disadvantages. After all, we have entered into an integral world, and we have a joint account with respect to the higher forces of nature. We are required to connect all families in one family.

Either we come to the realization ourselves, or we will have to go through a lot of blows through which we will eventually understand that the present crisis is designed to oblige us to establish a new connection between ourselves. It is not enough to improve connections within one’s family. We will not be able to maintain family ties, raise children properly, and live in harmony within the family if we do not decide that we have to achieve the consent of the general atmosphere of a family around the world, or at least within the nation.

This principle will determine the education we give children at home, in schools, and kindergartens, and will determine the values of our society. It will be in the air like a common opinion.

Thus, I think that the institution of the family will have to go through a great revolution to bring us to a new level, to a new look at human nature and our life on earth. We have to completely change ourselves.

The family is the most ancient foundation that accompanies the human being throughout his evolution. Even at a time when the ape had not yet come down from the trees, the family already existed. But now it’s time for great qualitative changes, after which we will rise to a new degree, indeed to the level of the human being.
[158686]
From KabTV’s “A New Life” 2/15/15

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Opinion (Radah Granovskaya, PhD, professor, Russian Center of Emergency and Radiation Medicine): “Today, young people perceive greater amounts of new material more quickly. They don’t read books and the speed in which changes occur around them is 50 times greater today and with different ways of processing the information.

“Children view the world differently. Their perception isn’t consecutive or sequential and not in the form of text. They see a whole picture, perceive information according to the principle of a ‘clip’ and they only need the general picture.

“Clip psychology also works in school and the textbooks are not really books anymore. Students read just a small section of a text and a week later another section. Thus they read many different small sections from different textbooks.This means that school actually offers them clips.

“There are, of course, kids who still think in a consecutive, sequential manner and who need various forms of information. It is isn’t by chance that people who still belong to this old school thinking are called the book people, while the people who belong to the new form of thinking are called the screen people.

“Fifty years ago, a machine was made of 500 parts and it took a real expert to find specific parts that were needed in order to repair it. Today things are made in groups of components and a whole component is replaced when needed. Therefore, there is no need for the old skills of yesterday. This is why the level of our skills and expertise has dropped People with a clip orientation cannot analyze and clarify things in a deep, logical manner and cannot solve serious problems.

“Very few wealthy professionals educate their children in classical music, various sports, thus leaving the computer out. This means that they bring them up according to the old principles that shape their thinking into consecutive, sequential thinking and not clip thinking. It is actually live and direct communication that provides something that is irreplaceable.

“My advice to university lecturers is to not to recommend books to their students, but rather assign only a chapter from a book and even better, a certain paragraph. Salespeople in bookstores have noticed that people rarely buy thick books that have more than 300 pages and that they don’t even look through them. People prefer to engage in other forms of entertainment other than reading.

“Clip thinking is the inevitable outcome of modern society and the direction in which civilization is developing, but those who follow the path of clip thinking will never become the elite. This is how social stratification takes place. Therefore, those who allow their children to sit in front of the computer screen for hours don’t prepare them for a brighter future.”

My Comment: In general, our future lies in penetrating into nature’s operating system, about which the wisdom of Kabbalah tells us. The educational system is closer to the traditional approach, leading a person deeper into the world of inner scrutiny, above his nature, keeping him away from clip thinking. A Kabbalist has to acquire this form of thinking so that he will be able to sum up this system in a short, concise manner. It is in this manner that the public will hear how to implement the wisdom of Kabbalah in order to discover the system on their level.
[158017]

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Question: For me personally, there is nothing more important than my family, children, and home. Although, nowhere else do I feel so cozy and warm as at home, at the same time, it does not always go smoothly in the family. What is the secret of the family? How should the family be to support us in life, to help us grow and move forward?

Answer: First of all, we must understand that the family is a natural phenomenon and in some form exists in animals as well. As much as the growing offspring need the family, it exists in nature.

The same can be said about people. Being born helpless, the human being is totally dependent on the love of parents who care about him and put him on his feet in a literal and figurative sense.

The family instills in the person the first most basic habits that he follows later in life and one is not able to get rid of them. Indeed, they are transformed into a conditioned instinct that exists forever. The family establishes values that are permanently rooted in a person. They can be good or bad values, but they will dictate a person’s behavior, whether one likes it or not.

Subconsciously, a person will seek to create the same form of the family that he had as a child. Marrying and having children, he still will constantly remember what his parents’ family was and will imitate it, trying to make his family similar.

It is very difficult to separate oneself from the influence of the parental home, no matter what relationships existed there. One simply must go back to the same form of family. Even if he was not comfortable in his parents’ home and he suffered and did not want his family to be similar, he still subconsciously comes to the same thing. It is very important to understand.
[158539]
From KabTV’s “A New Life” 2/15/15

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In the News (rg.ru):  “The separation of boys and girls in school leads to greater academic success than when they study in mixed classes.

“Students do not feel embarrassed and are not distracted by the other sex, which means that they can better concentrate on their studies. …

“Even knowing the answer, girls will be silent and wait until someone responds. In general classes, boys raise their hands first to answer the teacher’s questions.

“In women’s classes: everyone knew the answer, but said nothing because they were afraid to make a mistake. The teacher felt like she was in an empty classroom.  But if the students are praised, next time they will respond actively. A girl should be commended, even if she was wrong, or else the next time she will again remain silent. Interestingly, a boy does not understand this approach, and will spend a long time thinking about why he was noted for giving the incorrect answer

“Girls are calm and never shout. … In mixed classes, teachers yell more than in single sex classrooms. In a single sex classroom, there were fewer disciplinary problems in boys’ classes and they responded more calmly to the teacher’s remarks. In mixed classes, the boys tended to argue more with the teacher in order to show off in front of the girls.

“The great advantage of single sex classes is that the children are not distracted and thus better learn the material. With single sex classrooms in ordinary schools, there are very few drawbacks.”

My Comment: I think that children should study in single sex classrooms. Moreover, I believe that male teachers should teach boys and female teachers should teach girls. That’s the way it has been throughout history and I maintain that we should return to that. In my opinion, humanity will return to that after it learns from all the studies, experiments, and mistakes.
[158436]

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Question: I want to clarify the place of man in nature. On one hand, in a certain meaning, the life of modern man seems more miserable than the life of a beast, and on the other hand, as a result of the wisdom of connection, man can become a “superman” that sees the future, and everything will be opened in front of him.

Answer: However, for that, you need to exit from your “I” and feel the other as yourself. By that, you rise above your ego; you are not thinking about the corporeal benefit. You rise above yourself as you know it today and integrate in one big thought, in what is called the thought of creation, and want to realize it with full strength. Then you begin to understand that in order to realize it, you must bring it for everyone to know. This raises you above the animate degree. You begin to relate to everyone in a completely different form, relating in a good way like you do to yourself. You don’t feel any difference between the natures of the still, vegetative, animate, and man because you will relate to all with love.

Question: But which place in nature do I grasp?

Answer: You identify with the general mind that lies in nature, with all the intensity that is in the system, and you really will rise above all remaining creatures, above all existence, because you will know, understand, and be able to bestow upon the great thought of nature and its plan. Inside this plan, you will insert the missing “free” factor, which formerly was accidental because you did not participate in it by your choice, and, when you participate in this thought in an independent form, you add intensity to it. Thanks to you, all the still, vegetative, and animate nature begins to feel changes for the good from the side of the thought of creation, from the side of the forces that are managing and holding life within them. Finally, all of nature begins to calm down and reaches harmony.

Question: What will my dog feel at that time?

Answer: The dog cannot feel anything except the life of a beast, good or bad. But when man corrects himself, it will influence the animals too. It will improve their health and will give them a more comfortable feeling because now your dog suffers only because of you. If you have a bad mood, the dog feels it. Sometimes, man suffers from depression, and after some time his dog needs medication also, needs medication against depression. Everything begins in man. Therefore, it is worthwhile for us to make efforts, at least for our dog.

Question: Before I thought man was at the top of the pyramid of development, above all levels of nature—still, vegetative, and animate—but now I am not sure what my place is in all the system of nature.

Answer: As a result of egoistic development, man lowered himself to the bottom of the pyramid because he feels himself the most miserable of all instead of being at the top. But we are capable of reversing the pyramid. The levels of still, vegetative, and animate feel connection with the thought of creation, with its plan, and man does not feel it. We are still managed by it, but without our consent, without merging with it.

We must bring ourselves to adhesion, and then we will find ourselves at the top of the pyramid. The entire world will belong to us! We will rise above space, time, and motion, and coincidence. Like that, man moves from corporeal things and momentary calculations that are proved wrong tomorrow or even in the next moment, and exits to the level of thought.

Question: Who is wiser, man or nature?

Answer: Clearly nature is smarter! Who created whom? Nature is smarter and stronger than man.

Question: Then, what does it mean that man finds himself at the top of the pyramid?

Answer: To be on the top means to come to adhesion with the thought of creation. Because in man lies the ability to reach understanding and attainment of the whole plan of creation, its purpose, he rises to the same degree as the whole of nature, and in this form he reaches equivalence of form with the thought, includes himself in it, and reaches completion. This is called to be the crown of creation. For that, man was created. Precisely because of that we suffer today. This is the beginning of the correct deficiency to arrive at this state.

Question: So, we might come to the simple conclusion that if we would learn to feel the other as we feel ourselves, then we will succeed in seeing the future!

Answer: Correct.
[132320]
From KabTV’s “A New Life,” 2/23/14

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 In the News (from Psychologies.ru): “Manfred Kets de Vries, an anthropological researcher who spent several years in the rainforests of Cameroon with a tribe of Pygmies, brought back 7 principles from their social life, which in his opinion would improve all of humanity.

1.  Members of the group respect, support and have confidence in each other. In the harsh conditions of the forest it is possible survive only together. There is not always enough food, the hunt can be dangerous. And here trust and help are imperative. There are equal rights in relationships between men and women. The women hunt together with the men, are actively involved with the distribution of food, participate in discussions and also perform difficult labor.
2. The members of the group support and protect each other. There is no physical coercion in relation to women. They allocate a lot of time to discussing differences of opinion, yet they do this while maintaining self-respect. Causes of conflicts must be ‘reconsidered’, turning them into reasons for cooperation.
3. The members of the group are open to dialogue and communication. Disputes are resolved by informal methods. Everyone has the right to turn to others to get help in resolving the conflict. So the whole village begins to participate in solving the conflict until it is settled. The solution to arguments is not put off for long, negative feelings don’t remain below the surface.   Techniques for conflict resolution are also accommodated to work groups. One of the typical methods is joking, laughter and distraction so that people simply forget why an argument was created.
4. All the members of the group aspire to a common goal. The best method for catching the prey is hunting in a group, in which they chase the animals into nets. A common goal provides motivation for working in the group; women chase the animals into the nets and the men stand behind the nets and kill the prey. After the hunt, the meat is divided among the participants according to clear and precise laws.
5. The members of the group must have shared values and views. The life of the Pygmies can seem to a foreign observer as happy and carefree, but this impression is misleading. Apparently under the chaos is a hidden order. All of the Pygmies absorb the general rules of behavior from childhood, which are transmitted orally from generation to generation. A willingness to share, cooperation, independence and autonomy, keeping the peace among the members of the group, these are the basic values of the society.
6. The interests of the group are above the interests of its members. They don’t make it possible to put their interests above the interests of the group. Group work can be successful only in an atmosphere that welcomes personal freedom and creativity, but within the framework of the common goals of the organization. So that this balance will be maintained, every member of the group must understand where the limitations of his personal freedom extend.
7. The members of the group have equal rights in decision-making. There are no ‘important people’, there is no leader, there is no supreme council; leadership doesn’t belong to one person. Every member of the group has the right to make a decision. Adults are respected for knowledge, abilities and skills.”

My Comment: I see that everything goes back to the list of conditions for the unity of the Kabbalistic group, which contains a few additional conditions for attracting the Upper Light. But the conditions for unity are identical, for in the wisdom of Kabbalah everything happens according to the laws of nature, which the Pygmies discovered instinctively.
[157731]

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Question: How do we choose the appropriate partner? Where do we begin?

Answer: Follow the general law of nature in which everything seeks balance. So, the more similarity there is between the partners, the more compatible they are with each other. The similarity is in the education that they received, their values, their worldview, and their behavior in various internal and external situations. It is necessary to look for compatibility, and the more that couples are like each other, the more the family has a chance to succeed.

So first, it is up to the person to examine himself to understand who he truly is, and this is done with the help of talks, joint activities, and workshops. First of all, one must know human nature, study its psychology, through which I already will begin to understand who I am, what motivates me, and how and why I react in such a way.

It is necessary to find out how many reactions various people have for the same problem, ordinary life situations, and check how similar our reactions are so that we can understand each other. Perhaps, I am in a completely different situation now, but the response of my partner is clear to me, and I would react exactly like that if I were in a similar situation.

For this, we must teach a person to go outside of himself and be “clothed” in other situations, looking at himself from the side. He must check his responses in different situations, and then he will understand how many different types of behaviors exist in him, the different reactions and different patterns from which he is composed, and now it is up to me to understand which patterns the other person is composed of.

We use an approach like this in not only searching for a partner, but generally, in understanding another person. We must clarify how many different situations there can be, how many reactions, mood swings, and changes, to the extent that I can understand him and be clothed in his image. Can I imagine myself in his place? We give each other signs that we understand each other, that we agree and accept each other.

This is a study of the person, who he is and which forms of behavior he can have. There are various types of people: hotheaded, optimistic, melancholy, and indifferent (choleric, sanguine, melancholic, and phlegmatic). Psychology has clear criteria for these standard types and is able to determine which of them are compatible with each other. In this way, it isn’t a problem to classify people according to groups. As a result of workshops, discussions, and bonds created during games, they will understand who is more compatible with them.

The learning begins with talks and lectures that are designed to help singles understand what human nature is, with what intensity egoistic inclinations are discovered, and how much we depend upon the opinion of the environment, in other words, that we are compelled to submit to our internal impulses and societal pressures. Our behavior is determined by habits that we get through previous education. We must try to see what habits we are woven from and understand that the person standing in front of you is a complex personality of countless habits, and that I cannot “turn” him according to my desire.

After all, each of us expects that our partner will react exactly like we do at every moment in life and will behave like I want, but I must understand the other person and agree that, within each of us, there are a set of different human images to which I must accommodate myself or else I will not be able to be connected with him. In this way, I begin to discover flexibility regarding the other, building something compatible to both of us at every moment within all of his and my internal patterns. That is how we learn the simplest sociology of human behavior and that of any human society.

We must act exactly this way, for all of nature seeks balance, connection, and accommodation to equivalence of form at every moment. In the general system, everything depends on how much the components and the integration of the components become compatible with each other, until a homogeneous society is attained. Each is left with his freedom, yet he knows how to accommodate himself to everyone else. The general consensus depends upon this.

That same general rule operates within the family as well. That is what we must teach everyone. It is appropriate for the person found within the larger society as well as for familial peace. The same rules apply everywhere.

To establish a family, everyone must be a psychologist. We have no choice! We are facing a situation where we cannot connect between us in any other way. Previously, this connection was a natural connection as it is with animals, but we are no longer on the animate level. We have risen to the new level of Adam (Man). So, we must learn to build seemingly artificial connections that are not derived from our nature.

Man is not an egoistic and primitive creature. He must complement his egoism so that he will not alienate others but will reach connection with them. To do this, it is up to me to constantly concede a bit of my ego to make it possible for others to intrude my space, and my partner makes it possible for me to penetrate his space. Then we establish a connection between us.

I am one circle, and my partner is another circle. We begin to bring our circles closer together so that each one of us penetrates into a common segment, even though this is still a small segment. We then examine this common territory and make sure that we constantly maintain it between us. This is only possible though negating myself.
[132409]
From KabTV’s “A New Life” 6/9/13

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In the News (from The Independent): “For years, Finland has been the by-word for a successful education system, perched at the top of international league tables for literacy and numeracy.

“Which makes it all the more remarkable that Finland is about to embark on one of the most radical education reform programmes ever undertaken by a nation state – scrapping traditional ‘teaching by subject’ in favour of ‘teaching by topic.’

“’This is going to be a big change in education in Finland that we’re just beginning,’ said Liisa Pohjolainen, who is in charge of youth and adult education in Helsinki – the capital city at the forefront of the reform programme.

“Subject-specific lessons – an hour of history in the morning, an hour of geography in the afternoon – are already being phased out for 16-year-olds in the city’s upper schools. They are being replaced by what the Finns call ‘phenomenon’ teaching – or teaching by topic. For instance, a teenager studying a vocational course might take ‘cafeteria services’ lessons, which would include elements of maths, languages (to help serve foreign customers), writing skills and communication skills.

“More academic pupils would be taught cross-subject topics such as the European Union – which would merge elements of economics, history (of the countries involved), languages and geography.

“There are other changes too, not least to the traditional format that sees rows of pupils sitting passively in front of their teacher, listening to lessons or waiting to be questioned. Instead there will be a more collaborative approach, with pupils working in smaller groups to solve problems while improving their communication skills.

“Early data shows that students are benefiting too. In the two years since the new teaching methods first began being introduced, pupil ‘outcomes’ – they prefer that word to standards – have improved.”

My Comment: Everything that is group-related (connection) and closer to life (theme) will have a positive impact on knowledge and behavior.
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