Question: How can I determine when I am motivated by my ego and when by upper love? Suppose I am angry with a certain person or have a conflict with someone, how can I determine whether it is because of my good intention to help another or if I am motivated by my ego?
Answer: If you wish to determine whether you have altruistic impulses, thoughts, desires, or actions, you need to be with a group of like-minded people, called a ten, where you try to tune yourselves to mutual bestowal.
You will then begin to feel how incapable and unprepared you are for this. It is actually then that the recognition of evil begins and the realization of how far you still are from spiritual properties.
Everything depends on your group work when you are together with friends who also yearn for the property of bestowal, for the attainment and the revelation of the Creator. Start to develop this property between you and you will see that not only are you not becoming any closer to it, but you are actually becoming further away from it. This is the state that you need to reach. Then you will see that there is nothing spiritual in you for the time being.
From KabTV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah,” 1/26/20