Answer: An ideal state for a man and a woman is when they are totally compatible with the group, each according to his own circumstances and regardless of gender.
When a person totally melts into the group and takes upon himself all the problems and worries of the group, he thus turns into the bestowing part in the group, which means the male part.
It has nothing to do with physiology, a person’s external appearance, or gender.
Question: So why is everything in our world so complicated?
Answer: Because on one hand, our world was created according to the image of spiritual discernments, and on the other hand, our physical image is fixed. In this world a person cannot change and become a woman the next day if he is a man today, while in spirituality it is possible, and so our earthly wrapping has nothing to do with our spiritual level.
From the Kabbalah Lesson in Russian 12/6/15