Question: Today a lot of people don’t believe it is worth helping others anymore. People say that if you help someone and get them out of trouble, they become your worst enemy. Many feel completely drained after helping someone.

Do you think maybe we shouldn’t help anyone at all? Should we just let them make their own choices? If someone asked you this question, what would you say?

Answer: If you want to help someone, you must be ready to give. That means it is only going from you toward the other person—man, woman, child, animal, it does not matter who—but you help without expecting anything in return: kind treatment, gifts, or gratitude.

Comment: Not even a “thank you.”

My Response: Yes, exactly. Nothing! Only then is it truly help from your side.

Comment: That is very lofty to not expect even a thank you.

My Response: One word, “thank you,” can be worth billions. It does not matter what it is. Imagine a baby smiling at its mother, what a reward and expression of gratitude that is for her! So it all depends on whether you expect something in return.

Question: But is it possible to raise oneself to the point of not expecting anything in return? Is that even possible?

Answer: That is what true giving is.

Comment: That is beautiful! And at the same time, it feels impossible.

My Response: Otherwise, you are doing everything for the sake of gratitude.

Question: And then it does not count that we did something for someone?

Answer: Correct. Check how much of your help is actually selfless, what percentage and how much of it is given because you still hope to receive something in return—gratitude, a reaction.

Then perhaps you will not have such expectations.

Comment: And then there will not be any disappointment.

My Response: Yes, there will be no unfulfilled expectations.

Question: Why do we feel so drained after helping someone, like our heart has been broken?

Answer: It is precisely because you expected to get something in return. And if there is no feedback, no return energy, you feel an empty black hole.

Comment: That is very Kabbalistic.

My Response: That is just our nature. What can we do? So prepare yourselves to perform truly altruistic acts.

Question: What exercises can we do to tune ourselves to this?

Answer: Only outward—not back to yourself, only toward the other. You need to have the energy and the desire for this. And you certainly do not have that energy or desire yet.

So you must train to be able to do this, no matter to whom. If it matters to whom, this person or that, then that is already your reward.

Comment: So if I do it for an important person, then…

My Response: For someone important, close, kind, good, beautiful one, compared to someone ugly or dirty, it does not matter what or how.

Question: Then I am already receiving a reward?

Answer: Yes, right away. You need to reflect this very precisely inside yourself. It is very difficult.

Comment: You are asking the almost impossible from a person.

My Response: Not “almost impossible,” it is impossible! But it is the truth. That is the Kabbalistic calculation.

Question: Sooner or later, will we come to live this way?

Answer: Yes, life will gradually bring us to this inner psychology where we will see who we really are, what vile beasts we are, and how we cannot rise above ourselves, even if we want to! And then we will all cry out to the heavens together.

Question: “Give me strength,” right?

Answer: Yes, so that He gives us strength, understanding, reason, how we can we do it so that all of this does not return to my wretched egoism!

Question: So actually, when you always say in your videos: “You have to learn to do good or at least pass along kind thoughts to another person”—are you really talking about this?

Answer: I am speaking from this exact perspective.

Question: Step by step? So can a person gradually come closer to this?

Answer: Yes, it will all happen.

Question: Really?

Answer: Really!
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 4/27/25

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Comment: When there are completely different kinds of people in a group, some may repeat slogans, which is unacceptable to others.

My Response: We must forgive people. What can you do? We all started our lives by soiling diapers. It is the same here. People come; what do they understand, what do they know? Everyone is puffing up, wanting to express something of their own, and put themselves in a certain position. These are natural impulses of a small person. I too had them, and so did each of us.

I remember so well how totally hollow I used to be, all the bragging: why, how, for what? After all, I was not young anymore, over thirty, and not stupid, I was a scientist. And still. I remember how the egoism rocked me, I went through stages of self-aggrandizement, bragging, domineering, jealousy, whatever. Every person goes through all this.

Comment: I think it is great to be aware of it, not to stay in this, but to go through everything.

My Response: You are talking about realizing this, being able to correct it, and supposedly staying above it. That is, how good it is to realize that you are now putting pressure on egoism, how good you are, how strong you are, etc…! But this is an even higher form of egoism.

Question: What is above that?

Answer: There is more above it.

Comment: But still it is better than living in it.

My Response: Yes, undoubtedly, all this is much better, more purposeful, closer to the Creator, despite all the tricks egoism plays on us. Of course, this is better, because a person sees the work of the Creator on oneself. What did the Creator create? What evil, with what sophistication in me, such qualities!

Comment: The worst thing is when you want to change something and cannot do anything.

My Response: This is not terrible; it is wonderful when you are unable to do anything and feel completely empty, discouraged, powerless, and misunderstood—just out of it.

This is when you begin to think the Creator did this on purpose so you would turn to Him. But you do not have this need until you reach this point of despair. Only then will it arise in you: you need to turn everything only to Him; this is the only option, the only salvation.

Then you turn to Him. If your appeal comes from a totally disillusioned, desolate state, without a future, without anything, then the Creator helps you because you already have a complete request, a ripened desire.
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From KabTV’s “I Got A Call. When There is no Desire” 8/12/10

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Question: They say that everything depends on the intention. We see actions, and they can be the most benevolent, but intentions are not visible. If we could see a person’s intentions, what would we see?

Answer: Today, if our intentions were to be realized in the world, then the world would cease to exist.

Question: Are these our intentions?

Answer: Yes, of course.

Question: So today our intentions are to destroy?

Answer: Absolutely!

Question: Selfish, terrible?

Answer: The destruction of others, everyone, and everything.

Question: Is that why they don’t manifest?

Answer: Yes, we are not given strength.

Question: Are they not given strength precisely because they would be destructive?

Answer: Of course.

Question: And at what point will we be given strength? And then what will we see?

Answer: When we have the right intentions in accordance with the plan of nature, then we will begin to receive the strength to realize it.

Question: Tell me, what intentions should we have?

Answer: To come closer, to unite, to connect, to comprehend the highest level of nature, to reveal mutual connection, love.

Question: If this intention were revealed, what would have been revealed to us, what would we have seen?

Answer: That we are initially in a single system and all our attempts to exist up to now have been only in the opposite direction—to break this system.

Question: And what should be done to reveal these intentions of ours?

Answer: To try with all our might to break through the wall of this egoism, which does not give us the opportunity to either realize, make any movement, connect somehow, or ask.

Question: Is it important to ask?

Answer: Yes.

Question: And at what point will I ask?

Answer: When you see that you really want to, but you can’t.

Question: What prevents the Creator from just giving us this and that’s it? Why does He need our work?

Answer: If you don’t want it, how can I give it to you? That would be forced. There is no such thing in the spiritual world.

Question: So the conclusion is this: He must bring us to the state that we ask for: “Give us the opportunity to break out of our selfishness”?

Answer: Yes.

Comment: So the conclusion is this: He has to show us that our selfishness is destructive, murderous.

My Response: But if He shows us, then we simply will not be able to exist. We need to strive for this ourselves, and then, as we strive, we will realize that we are in the opposite state, and we will ask.

Question: So our whole task is to strive for connection, for unity, as you say, for kind thoughts?

Answer: Yes.

Question: You use such simple words all the time. Good thoughts? And then we will see that we can’t do it and ask: “Give us this opportunity!” Is that the plan?

Answer: Yes.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 4/8/25

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Question: I realized that there is a concept of “quality of prayer” in everything. Even in moments when I understand that I am in joy and the Creator shows me my true place, I still have to ask Him to give me more understanding of how distant I am from Him.

There is a difference here between my asking Him to show me my true place and between me complaining that He is not showing it to me. What is the difference in the quality of prayer here?

Answer: We cannot accurately evaluate every prayer according to its parameters or how much it differs from other prayers. It comes from the depth of the heart. I am not sure a person can accurately know what he feels.
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From the 2^nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson on 4/9/25, Writings of Rabash “But the More They Afflicted Them”

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Rabash, “What is Because of Impatience and Hard Work in the Work”: We need to work hard because it is only the sufferings of hard work that make us cry out to the Creator with a whole desire that the Creator will save us from the dominance of Pharaoh, the king of Egypt. This means that it is from a state of lowliness that a person senses that he feels worse than all the other people and this pushes him to cry out to the Creator with all his heart so that He will help him. But he believes that the Creator hears his prayer since He has revealed his evil to him and so He will surely help him and take him out of the evil too, which is called redemption. This means that he believes that the Creator let him understand that he is in exile and He will surely take him out of exile afterward.

We advance by two forces, but for those who don’t know where to go, there is only one force that pushes them from behind and forces them to move forward. They are constantly trying to escape from it, trying to be saved from the “roller of development” that catches up with them from behind and pushes them to advance.

But the path of the Torah is different from the path of suffering. A person is given the wisdom of Kabbalah so that he will build up the force that will illuminate before him and will pull him, in the hope for a better future, with great hopes, positive examples, a feeling of awe that is felt by the connection and spiritual elation.

The goal must be as glowing and as attractive as possible, and depicted as wonderful and good. Although the advancement is by the ego, which we must constantly reject, we have to try to use this method: to draw the light that reforms, so that it will do all the work. The approach here requires subtlety, like in anything. If you know how to enter it, then it is very easy for you to do it. Someone who doesn’t know this feels great difficulties and constantly runs into a wall.

We have to arrange the right environment in which you will soon begin to suffer because of the lack of connection and because of your envy, lust, and desire for respect. You will see that others are more successful than you. You will envy others that succeed in connecting so strongly and you will also want to attain that.

The envy forces you to demand your change. You already know how to evoke the reforming light, you begin to change under the influence of the light, and thus advance. The main thing is to develop the drawing force that is called “I shall hasten it.” It is because the troubles, the sufferings, the natural force of evolution “in its time,” is not up to you. We should understand that the sufferings come to a person in order to wake him up; we need to develop the pangs of love by ourselves instead of corporeal sufferings so that instead of the evil that catches up with us, the goodness will illuminate in front of us.

Instead of the natural course in the grip of time, we should rise above time in order to determine the pace of our advancement by ourselves. This means that it is all in your hands! We have to feel elation and a sense of awakening since it all depends only on us! If we want it today, it will be today! If we really want it now, it will be now! Everything that we want to attain by the path of the Torah can be promoted and achieved.

It is very important to emphasize this in the work: to operate and integrate all the components, all the means that we have in the way of “I shall hasten it” that will help us advance. We have to develop all the means and to connect them correctly in order to see that there is certain method here instead of following the path of suffering by developing under the pressure of our nature. A person can advance by rising above nature in order to advance before it and to open the gates for it.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/21/13

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We must constantly work with great precision to not waste a single minute. This is the formula for success. It’s not that each minute is so important in itself, but that you don’t let yourself go.

You push yourself in this race to the point of exhaustion and leave yourself no opportunity, not even a moment, to slip away from spiritual work.

Only then do you begin to feel the impossibility of reaching the goal through your own efforts and the right request for the Creator’s help arises within you, and He responds without delay.
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From KabTV’s “I Got a Call. The Kabbalist is Out of It” 7/30/10

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Once a person is convinced that he has nothing in his hands, that he has a long path to travel, that he has searched, suffered, and tried to make something of himself and sees he cannot, he turns to the Creator.

Question: Where is the element of happiness here, at what point?

Answer: You feel you have nothing else but the Creator. You have to appeal to Him and simply persuade, beg, urge, or compel, and oblige Him.

Comment: To answer.

My Response: Yes, just demand revelation.

Question: Is that moment the moment of happiness?

Answer: Yes.

Comment: So the whole path, we can say it was…

My Response: The whole path was also toward revealing the Creator because all you wanted on your spiritual path was to gain the quality of love and bestowal. Only you couldn’t turn to the Creator.…

Comment: With a broken heart.

My Response: Right, you could not make the correct appeal. And now you have done it. Today, people are already exhausted, and therefore, they can hear it.

Question: So one way or another, people want to come to the true prayer today?

Answer: If we did not fool ourselves with the media and other things, we could slowly explain what happiness is.
[342340]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 1/4/21

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Hence, when receiving the concealments and afflictions, he is certain to take the known cure—to do much praying for the Creator to help him out of the state he is in (Baal HaSulam, Shamati 8, “What Is the Difference between a Shade of Kedusha and a Shade of Sitra Achra?”).

Question: In this phrase, there seems to be some egoistic component, as if a person is asking, “It hurts, take me out of this state.” What should a prayer be like?

Answer: Why do you think that our appeal to the Creator must be absolutely altruistic?

We begin our path as complete egoists. But gradually, we purify ourselves from egoism and direct ourselves toward the Creator so that our requests become more altruistic, on behalf of others, for all people.

Therefore, we should not think that the most important thing for us is to stop worrying about others. On the contrary.
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From Daily Kabbalah lesson 3/7/24, Writings of Baal HaSulam “What Is the Difference between a Shade of Kedusha and a Shade of Sitra Achra?”

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The Creator stands behind your hater, the enemy stands behind him. If you want to turn to the Creator, you must somehow break through the heart of your enemy with your attitude.

Comment: But this is an unbearable condition.

My Response: This is an unbearable condition, which means, we will die, from century to century.

Question: Do you think this is the main condition?

Answer: Yes! It should become something that I must see in everyone, my beloved people. Moreover, there are particles of the Creator, His messengers, representatives.

If I treat everything around me in this way, I will suddenly see that the Creator is clothed in them. He is in them, fills them, and in general, it is all Him. Everything!

Question: The person hears you, and everything turns inside out. He says: “It is not just impossible!” What should he do, the way he is?

Answer: Turn over. Roll over!

Question: And here too, should I ask the Creator: “Give me the opportunity to turn over”?

Answer: Of course! And who am I? Some kind of selfish little part that is not capable of anything.

Question: So I am able only if I turn to the Creator, that I want to turn over and approach my enemy, and embrace him, and raise a prayer with him?

Answer: I ask the Creator to allow me to do this, to show me, to teach, to push, and that my opponent would also want the same thing, would agree with me. Because I see both myself and my opponent as an act of the Creator. That the Creator is pointing us at each other like this, pushing horns against each other, inciting us.

And that is why I ask the Creator to bring us closer, to open arms instead of fists, so that we gradually show our love for each other. Right down to love.

Comment: If the world could hear you…

My Response: If people want to, that is the problem. And the Creator is ready for it if people want to. If they want to, it depends on the suffering they feel.
[340890]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 3/3/22

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Question: On one hand, you say we need to take action: “Since you created me with certain qualities, give me the strength to pray.” But I am afraid I might do something wrong and harm myself. Guide me properly so that I do not close off in prayer and so I can convey its essence to the ten.

Answer: Get together with your friends and begin to briefly describe your state so as not to lose the path you are charting.

Once you manage to do this, select excerpts from prayers which are the most appropriate for your state, with all the additions. Incorporate your requests into this prayer. You will see how everything turns out well.

Question: Does the strength of a prayer depend on the root of the soul?

Answer: The strength of a prayer depends only on a person’s inner root. In general, when something is truly revealed in Kabbalah, it is revealed much more simply and more comprehensively. The main thing is not to give up, to study, write questions, and refer to the source.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/24/25, Great Is Repentance, for it Reaches Unto the Throne

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