When a person asks the Creator for forgiveness, he has to feel that he has sinned. Otherwise, it turns out that he just mocks the Creator and the entire system that He created. However, we do not feel that we have committed any sins and do not think we need to be corrected. It is all because there is a law in nature that you repeat a crime for a second time and you already consider it as permitted not recognizing it as a sin.
Therefore, we need to think: is it possible that we do commit crimes in our life? In fact, we are full of crimes, every one of us at every moment. However, we return to them all the time, and therefore in our egoism, we do not feel we are committing a crime. You repeat a crime a second time and you begin considering it the norm; this is the law of nature.
A person is perplexed: What did I do? Who did I harm? The crime is felt just for the first time. After that, I can repeat it a thousand times and will not feel that I am doing something bad.
This is why we do not feel that we are sinners when we ask the Creator for forgiveness. What is our fault? Before Rosh HaShanah it is customary to cry and ask for forgiveness, but these are artificial tears since we do not recognize our crimes.
Therefore, we need to become included in the tens and find out that we are neglecting our friends, our connection, and our appeal to the Creator. We do not feel that we are constantly returning to the same crimes and therefore we stop considering them sin, a vice.
I should feel how much I disregard the Creator in order to ask his forgiveness for not appreciating Him enough, not realizing that only the Creator does everything, arranges everything, controls everything, that there is none else besides Him, and I depend on Him one hundred percent.
I was not considering correctly the presence of the Creator in my life, was not recognizing that only He determines my thoughts, desires, perception of reality. Now I ask to forgive me because I did not attach importance to the Creator.
It means that all my pleas for forgiveness are only with regard to the singularity of the upper governance and all my appeals to the Creator are only through the ten. All this we establish inside our connection: how much I disregard my friends, do not consider them as great, and do not value the ten, which is the only tool that can direct me to the Creator.
To the extent I disregard my ten, I disregard the Creator. Therefore, first of all, I must work with the ten, and through it, I will come to the Creator.
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 9/15/20, “What Is Preparation for Selichot (Forgiveness)”
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