Answer: I felt it because, in general, it was not yet developed. I did not know exactly how to apply myself, how to realize it, where to lower myself, and where to help.
This methodology is not comprehended immediately. It takes months and years. Therefore, we have been given our whole lives to realize it. For example, when studying math, you learn it with your mind and you do not change at all. And here, in order to turn the page in the book and understand the next one, you have to change, and then read the previous one. If a person is unable to change, then even by turning ten pages, he will not understand what is written there.
The practice is carried out only in a group. It is all clearly described in the articles of Rabash about the group. Take them all and implement them. There is no shortage of practical advice. Only the implementation.
From the Kabbalah Lesson in Russian 8/5/18