The moment I receive the intention “for the sake of bestowal” without receiving anything in return, I begin to be called a “son of the future world”; I enter the upper world in the perception through the intention to bestow, the aspiration to bestow.
Then I begin to perceive the Light that fills me, the Light of Hassadim, in my bestowal to others (only inside the desire, because so far I have nothing to bestow), in my attitude towards them. This fulfillment pulls me away from my egoistic desire.
It does not disappear, but I pull away from it, rise above it; it no longer feels important to me, the desires of others become important to me, just like what matters most to a mother is the desire of her infant, and she dedicates herself fully to caring for him. But this is part of her nature, and we attain this attitude towards others through the Upper Light.
In this way I reveal the upper world. And as I disconnect from myself and begin to live within the desires of others without any connection to myself, I reach a state called “freedom from the angel of death,” when my desire, where I previously felt alive, no longer feels like the source of life in me, something that brings me to life. It does not bring me to life. I perceive life in the fulfillment of other desires, Kelim, because they have become mine.
Freedom from the angel of death means that my desire, even on its lowest initial level, which seems as though my body can cease living, receiving even the minimal illumination that gives it life, Kista de Hayuta, and I do not feel as if I had lost something. I no longer relate myself to it because I have acquired a different Kli, called soul.
These others’ desires that I perceive as mine are called a vessel, the Kli of my soul. And the fulfillment within these desires is fulfillment with the Light of NRNHY of my soul. There I meet the upper force, the root of everything, and this means that I attain adhesion with the Creator.
Then I begin to understand that the little sensation in my egoistic desire, with which I had begun my journey, was a mere illusion in which I needed to live and exist in order to enter this universal reality of bestowal.
The previous reality was simply imaginary, existing only in my illusion, like in a dream. But in reality it does not exist, because there is no place for desire to receive pleasure. This imaginary, made-up world disappears like a dream.
In this way we approach a different desire. And every time a person attains within the Kelim of others, which become his own. And this is why it is written: “Man learns where his heart desires”; in that place, in those desires, he reveals an eternal, absolute, higher life.
From the lesson 11/26/2010, Writings of Rabash