Question: How much love can I receive in order to pass it on to my group?

Answer: If it is true love, then there is no limit to receiving love and no limit to giving it. The whole problem is in receiving love that does not turn out to be limitless. Baal HaSulam writes that boundless love turns into hatred in us. We cannot answer it because we cannot limit it in our Kli.

Therefore, if parents endlessly love their child, then they disfigure him. After all, he does not have the opportunity to feel where the boundaries are. As a result, he begins to hate his parents. It comes from nature. He gets the desire to pierce them, to do something in spite of them, because they do not set boundaries for him with their love.

It is a well-known principle that we receive everything in our Kli in a limited form. Thus, when we give something to another, we must explain these boundaries, convey them along with our love: “I love you from here to here and no more.”

By nature, we are very limited and do not perceive infinity, which we will be able to feel only with complete correction. Therefore, if you give infinite pleasure to a small Kli, it turns into hatred. In no case should you do that.

But you can always add love to our work. Do not be afraid, you are still far from making it endless.
[336971]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/28/19, “Questions and Answers”

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Comment: I read seven tips that someone gave for a person to have an easier life.
“The ability to wait is the best thing one can master.”

My Response: If it is not about spiritual work, then yes; however, if it is about spiritual work, then no. When it comes to spiritual work, one has to constantly move forward.

Comment: “The first step is only the beginning.” It means that once you make the first step you are already halfway to victory.

My Response: The first step is not half the way to the victory, but it is still an entrance. Whether it is the beginning of the victory will become clear from the rest of the steps.

Comment: “If it is difficult, means you are advancing.”

My Response: I do not think that difficulty is a sign that we are moving forward correctly. No.

The evidence that we are moving forward is our ability to summarize all problems, information, and opposites into one whole. They all complement each other and add up in an absolute precise way into one single perfect picture in our root that we are moving toward.

Comment: “Break the chains that constrict your thoughts and you will break the chains that constrict your body.” At times we are standing still because of the thoughts that prevent us from moving forward. We have to remove the negative thoughts that slow us down and instill fear in us.

My Response: We move through both negative and the positive thoughts together. Both of them are necessary. It is like a wheel where some part is moving forward and some part is moving backward relative to the center of the wheel.

Comment: “Calmness is a condition for success.” When we are calm we are capable of doing much more than when we are possessed by emotions.

My Response: No. All of Kabbalah is based on opposites, on the combination of opposites. We have to be calm in complete endless movement. There is no other way. We cannot be calm and rely on the will of a flow of life that we will end up wherever it carries us.

These are Eastern methodologies. They do not include the left line and therefore I cannot equate them with Kabbalah or give any comment.

Comment: “Judgment is darkness for a person.” We should never insult and lower the individuality of a person in any way. The only thing we can do is to condemn him for his actions, but not the person himself.

My Response: We should not condemn anyone. Absolutely no one! We have to correct ourselves. When you correct yourself, you correct the world in a way that there will be no one who would condemn you.

Comment: “Belief in one’s rightness is a limitation.”

My Response: Belief in one’s rightness has a place only when it is based on the absolute upper knowledge, not by you, but by the masses. When you are moving together with the masses and reveal the Creator in connection between you, then you find the true rightness. An individual person cannot have any correctness.

In order to have some overall orientation in life, it is necessary to have nine more friends together with you. In this way, in a ten, like in a laboratory, you will be able to create a mini-system, a mini- society, where you can clearly project the entire nature, entire humanity, and all the worlds between yourselves.

You would create such a magic balloon from your ten desires and intentions and would see all universes, all worlds, all their inhabitants, and the Creator in it like in the mini-image, in the mini-model. Then by working on this model you would clearly understand who you are and where you are going.
[248407]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 6/25/19

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Question: Second grader Stasik asks the Creator: “Did You give me my own soul or someone else’s?”

Answer: No, you received your own soul. But if you are not satisfied with it, you can work to correct it.

Question: What kind of soul should one aim for?

Answer: One that loves everyone.

Question: Do people have this desire?

Answer: I do not think so.

Question: But what about children?

Answer: Personally, I think children are more inclined toward correction than adults.

Adults have already settled into their ways and believe that things will not and cannot get better, and they simply should accept what they have.

Question: Do children still hold on to hope?

Answer: Yes.

Comment: Ideally, with experience, we should…

My Response: But we do not. Where would we get the patience, experience, or determination to resist what we have? We just accept it as it is.

Question: Is this because of the blows? Because we constantly experienced setbacks and received blows?

Answer: Yes, it is because we are too lazy to correct ourselves.
[337026]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 11/4/24

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Comment: From a letter: “You always talk about kindness and love, but in reality, people treat each other like parasites.”

My Response: Of course.

Question: “And the kindest people in this world take the most blows from others and from fate. So the choice is either to be a parasite in life or to suffer from parasites. Please explain why one should be kind in this world, and why do you advise it?”

Answer: Because if we are kind, we become like the Creator. Then it will be better and easier for us both in this world and in the next.

Comment: But this person believes it is better for the parasites, those who use others and live that way.

My Response: That is just how it seems to him. In small, limited circumstances, he might be somewhat right. But overall in life, no.

Comment: So you are saying that we should still raise children with good relationships, with concepts of friendship, decency, and so on. And looking at the bigger picture, you say that this is correct.

My Response: Yes.

Comment: But if we narrow our focus, as he says, parasites just…

My Response: When you narrow your focus, you are limiting yourself to isolated cases. And then, of course, it seems better to be an egoist. But if you look at life as a whole, at what a person is left with, and where they end up after, then it is clearly better to be kind.

Question: Tell me, does this kindness ever come back to a person?

Answer: It does not exactly “come back.” It gives you the ability to understand why everything is made this way and how it is still better to act kindly.

Question: Is that important?

Answer: It is important.

Comment: Right now, you are not even saying that kindness will return to you as good.

My Response: We do not see that.

Question: But if we look at it globally, does it still return?

Answer: Not in our world.

Question: You are being so definitive: if you do good, good does not come back to you?

Answer: Yes.

Question: But we should not conclude from this that we should not do good? We should continue?

Answer: Yes.

Question: You started by saying that the Creator is good and does good and we must be like Him. Will this ever come back to me? Or should I not think about that at all?

Answer: The fact that you think this way and can act this way is already the Creator’s bestowal. This is already the reward.

Question: What about those who, as he says, are parasites, what happens to them? I would like to ask about them.

Answer: They calculate their dividends and believe they are happy.

Question: And you think they are not?

Answer: No.

Question: Can we say, as an egoist asking, that after they finish their life, in another world, will they be punished for being parasites? Or not? Will there be punishment?

Answer: Yes, without a doubt! And it will be in such a way that they will even not understand it at first.

Question: But it comes? Is this how the Creator teaches a person?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Through suffering like this?

Answer: It is not the Creator teaching the person; it is a general law of nature: everything a person does must be compensated for—good with good, evil with evil.
[333947]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 8/12/24

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Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs (Chrissy, age 6).

Question: Is this love?

Answer: Yes, it is love.

Question: Why, can you explain as if you were to explain this to the child?

Answer: Because he is giving away something he himself likes. It feels good for him to have it, but he gives it away.

Question: Is that a simple answer? I really want to eat it, but I give it to my friend. And this is called love?

Answer: Yes, that is love.

Comment: Another answer from the group of children who were asked what love is:
Love is what makes you smile when you are tired (Terri, age 4).

My Response: That is also love. Because by doing that, you uplift another person, elevate them, make them feel good against their will.

Question: So you are associating this with smiling for another person?

Answer: Yes.

Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it every day (Noelle, age 7).

My Response: This speaks more about the love of the boy who wears the shirt toward the one who complimented it.

Question: Why is that love?

Answer: Because the boy who wears the shirt wants to please the one who likes it.

You shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget (Jessica, age 8).

My Response: I don’t think such behavior should be taught to a child.

Question: But this is the child’s answer, an eight-year-old child. So if you do not love, should you say that you do?

Answer: No, you should not lie.

Question: And if you love, should you say that you do?

Answer: Probably, yes, but I think even in that case, not entirely.

Comment: The winner of the contest to find the most caring child judged by Leo Buscaglia was a four-year-old boy whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the neighbor’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his mother asked the boy what he said to the neighbor, the boy replied: “Nothing. I just helped him cry.”

My Response: These are somewhat unbelievable stories for a four-year-old child.

Question: But helping someone cry, what do you think about this moment of compassion?

Answer: It is good.

Question: Does it really help?

Answer: Of course!

Question: So the child sits down, looks at you, and cries with you?

Answer: Yes, but that is too much. It is somewhat unreal.

Question: I see. So here is a question: where does all this go afterward? Even all these answers—they contain such childlike purity. Where does it go? How do we become haters, warriors, killers, criminals? Where does the child inside us go? This child who grew up like this?

Answer: Egoism grows and consumes everything there is.

Question: And that is it?

Answer: That is it.

Question: Does this child remain in us or does it also…?

Answer: There is a possibility to start developing anti-egoistically, to suppress this ego within us.

Question: Can we return to this child even a little?

Answer: Yes, but it will not be a child anymore.

Question: Is it an adult child then?

Answer: Yes.

Question: When you say that an old man is like a child. A wise person is like a child. What do you mean when you say that? That the child does not die in us, that it remains?

Answer: Yes, the child does not die in us and remains because we desire to experience nature and life directly, like children.

Question: Is there this spontaneity in these answers?

Answer: Yes.
[327739]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 3/25/24

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Question: Baal HaSulam writes that the foundation for the future society will not be education and public opinion but something more serious. After all, education and public opinion only will not be able to convince egoists to become altruists. What can it be?

Answer: It will not just be education and public opinion. In such a system, everyone must consider what contribution they need to make to the common fund and receive from it only what is absolutely necessary for them.

Entire organizations will work on this, ensuring that each person gives their share into the so-called common pot.

Question: Baal HaSulam also says that a higher value, the upper force, can become such a basis. As we know from Kabbalah, the upper force is the quality of bestowal and love. It will become the highest ideal for humanity, and everyone will agree with this. How can this happen?

Answer: It is very simple, because people who feel that they are bestowing because they want to help others, to fulfill them, they will in turn receive a spiritual fulfillment, which will bring them to a higher level of existence.

And so, society will gradually elevate itself with all the controlling bodies, all the calculations, and will reorganize itself in such a way that there will be no need for police, overseers, or anything of the sort. Instead, there will be voluntary and honest accounting by each individual.

In other words, humanity will reach a state where it will feel the upper force. Working for it, manifested through working for others, will essentially become the fuel for a person.

Question: You are talking about some ideal state when people feel this. But what if a person does not feel that?

Answer: If a person is on such a level that he does not feel spiritual actions at all, then he needs to be engaged in them. Society must embrace him and show him: the more good he does, the more goodwill society will show him; the more evil he does, the less society will tolerate him.
[333281]
From KabTV’s “Era of the Last Generation” 8/8/24

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In the News (BBC): “Dr Caspar Addyman from Goldsmiths, University of London is an expert on why babies laugh and author of The Laughing Baby.

“At Goldsmiths’ InfantLab, he leads an exciting branch of child development research designing laughter experiments, talking to parents around the world and even monitoring viral social media trends. …

“It’s actually in the second month that you will likely see your baby’s first real smile. …

“By about 3 or 4 months old, you may find that your baby starts to smile at the sound of your familiar voice. …

“Most of us think the starting point for laughing is a funny joke or action, but actually it’s a way of connecting to the people we’re with.”

Question: What does this indicate?

Answer: Children want to receive positive stimuli from their environment. Therefore, if people around them are smiling and laughing, it excites them in a positive way.

Question: We grow up, and all this fades away. We start to take pleasure in the misfortunes of others.

What happens to us? Where does that baby, that infant, go? Where does all of it disappear?

Answer: We sense the state of another person and rejoice in their problems. This instantly reassures us. We understand that it is not happening to us, and so we feel happy.

Question: At what point does this absolute and complete shift in thinking and consciousness?

Answer: When our egoism is aroused. We immediately start to orient ourselves around it.

Question: Now many would disagree and say they are not such egoists, but are quite the opposite. Many write to us saying this is not true, that they are giving, loving people, and so on. When does a person start to recognize this critical view of themselves? What is that moment?

Answer: This is already the next stage.

Question: So the first stage even for an adult is: “I am not an egoist, others are.” And the second stage is?

Answer: Is when they look at themselves.

Question: Will we ever return to that infant state when we are happy for the happiness of others?

Answer: If we create such an atmosphere among our friends, in a group, and so on, then we will return.

Question: So in principle a person should seek friends who look inside themselves?

Answer: Yes.
[329965]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 4/8/24

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In the News (NPR):

“On March 27, 2013, John Sweeney, a plumber from Ireland, started a Facebook page called Suspended Coffees. His message was simple: Buy a cup of coffee for a stranger, because an act of kindness can change a life. Eight hours later, the page had attracted more than 20,000 likes.

“Suspended coffee, or caffe sospeso, is a tradition that comes from Naples, Italy, and dates to at least the turn of the 20th century. When customers buy coffee, they also pay in advance for a cup to be given to somebody else — usually someone who otherwise couldn’t afford it. …

“One challenge to making kindness through coffee a staple of American culture is that ‘we’re a society that isn’t very comfortable, culturally, with asking for help,’

Question: Is it possible to come up with such harmony for humanity so that those who have money and opportunity would present something without their names and others would use it without humiliating themselves at the request? Would it bring us closer to harmony or not?

Answer: Partially, yes.

Question: What is the most important element here? That it is offered up and is anonymous?

Answer: That is natural, no last names, nothing. Neither who gives nor who receives. That is how everything exists incognito.

Question: Is there harmony in this?

Answer: Sure.

Question: Does the fact that I give something of mine away without demanding anything in return make the world warmer, better?

Answer: Partially. Our egoism will not allow us to do this every day. You can do this for a week or so but not all the time.

Question: So it cannot be a process of upbringing that leads to this and we would live like this all the time?

Answer: No.

Question: There must be ups and downs?

Answer: Otherwise it will be like some kind of tax and so on.

Question: It would no longer be an effort?

Answer: Yes, and there must be an effort.

Question: It is clear that this is a process of education more for someone who suspends, that is, for a rich person. And for the one who accepts, what is here? Is there any kind of upbringing for him?

Answer: He must understand that someone has thought of him. And therefore, when he gets the same opportunity, he will have to do it too.

Question: It is beautiful! Is a mutual upbringing process taking place?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Is it possible to do this?

Answer: This is a mutual agreement. This can, of course, be done.

It is possible to come to this through education. A person becomes educated and then it becomes a habit. And he thinks about it, does not forget, and does it. Or it could be under pressure, like some kind of tax.

But there is no other way because egoism in us is constantly growing and requires that we feed it.

Question: So a person will somehow adapt to these efforts?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Can we say what the final way to harmony is?

Answer: The final approach to harmony is when we do not feel our egoism would force us to do something. It is when we rise above it and are truly free. This is, of course, aerobatics! But it will happen.

Question: You slowly lead into a mini-dead-end, and then suddenly you say: “But it will be.” Do you want to calm us down or will it happen?

Answer: I am sure this will happen, and humanity must come to this. It is written in our genes.
[330496]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 5/13/24

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We told each other even before getting married that we did not want to bring children into this world. We are two lonely souls who found each other and who understand that the world is terrible. We decided that we would live for each other. But now I am writing to you being five months pregnant. It is too late for abortion. We agonized over the decision, whether to go through with it or not, and now I will be giving birth. Yet, we both do not understand how we got here. (From a letter to Dr Laitman)

Answer: You were brought to this.

My first question is: how could this happen to us? We clearly did not want this.

Answer: Many people would not want children, but life itself pushes them to conceive a child.

Question: When you say “life itself,” are you hinting at someone or something?

Answer: I am hinting at the fact that nature made us this way, and that is why we end up here.

Question: So resistance is futile?

Answer: There are people who consciously, even excessively, build such boundaries around themselves saying “We do not want this and that is final.” There are societies like that too.

Question: Who forces a person to cross this boundary? Is this, in principle, also something that happens from above?

Answer: Yes.

Question: So you do not understand how it happened, but that means you were closed off in that moment?

Answer: Yes.

How can we protect our future child from this world? What can we do, how can we raise him so that he is not touched by this dirt?

Answer: I don’t know. Raise him well and give him a good education, a reliable profession. That is all.

Question: When you say “raise him well,” what do you mean by that?

Answer: Raise him well means knowing how to relate to people in a way that elicits positive reactions from them. That is it.

Question: Is that what you mean, not education, but upbringing specifically?

Answer: Yes, upbringing.

Question: What advice can you give to a couple who finds themselves in a situation where their decisions and plans have changed and they are expecting a child?

Answer: Solve all these problems together.

Question: And go for it?

Answer: Go for it. How else? Work through it together and support each other. And they will see that this shared child actually connects them and gives them a new chapter in life, in existence.

Question: So this becomes their new life, right?

Answer: Yes.

Question: What is the best way to deal with anxiety about a future child? This is more of a general advice for others. There is anxiety about a future child, not wanting to give birth. How do you deal with this anxiety?

Answer: This is natural. You need to give birth, you need to raise the child and do everything you can. And gradually, you will see yourself one day as a mature person, a grandparent.

Question: What practical steps can be taken right now during pregnancy to create a safe environment for the child? Because this is something that worries them constantly.

Answer: The most important thing is for the child to understand life. This means understanding why a person exists, how they should behave, which people to avoid, which to get closer to, and so on. In other words, teach them how to interact correctly with this world.

Question: You are giving some very simple, vital, wise advice. Stay away from certain people, get closer to others, try to love others so that they love you. Is that the main thing in upbringing?

Answer: Of course! What else could there be?

Question: How is it that nowadays there are so many people being raised completely differently? That is, people who are filled with hatred…

Answer: You should not raise your children that way because it will only make their lives harder. Hatred eats away at a person.

Question: You do not watch much television, I know. But today, all these channels, YouTube and others are full of fights where people hit each other hard, on the back of the head, wherever. Then, all these movies are packed with strong people who twist others and so on. That is, there is a completely different process of upbringing, more and more, not to love and be loved.

Is this a demand today? Do people want this, do they watch this?

Answer: I think it is not so much a demand as they are being pumped full of it. And of course, this will only make things worse for people.

Question: If we’re talking about raising a child, is it advisable to keep them away from this?

Answer: Yes.

Question: To the point of shielding them from seeing it?

Answer: Of course. What is the point?

Question: There is no point?

Answer: None.
[333226]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/29/24

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Question: In his notes “The Last Generation,” Baal HaSulam says that nothing can be done by force, it must be through public opinion. He explains why the altruistic system did not work in the Soviet Union. That social system collapsed because it lacked an element of the upper force. How can this be explained to people so everyone has a common understanding?

Answer: Only through gradual learning.

Comment: Baal HaSulam says that education will not help either. We saw what positive education there was in the Soviet Union.

My Response: No, it should be different. Education should be based on what people feel, where it leads, and how all layers of society support it.

In other words, education and public opinion are tools. But there must be a higher value: why we want to build such a society.

We must understand that humanity’s development has a purpose, which, as Baal HaSulam writes, is to achieve adhesion with the Creator. That is our work. If we do not explain this to people, we will not be able to accomplish anything.
[333545]
From KabTV’s “Era of the Last Generation” 8/8/24

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