Question: Why, in the process of studying Kabbalah, at first, I feel complete enthusiasm, everything is clear and understandable, I want to sing. Then there comes a moment when you cease to understand the material, there is doubt, discontent in everything and the thoughts:” Do I need it?”
Answer: This is true. This is exactly what happens in Kabbalah. For some, this occurs very quickly, after a year or two, and for others after five to ten years.
The fact is that there comes a period when a person approaches the revelation of the Creator, attainment of his connection with the Creator. This connection is determined by the ability to rise above one’s egoism.
This is where a stupor occurs. He pushes it away from himself. When everything was fine and with the help of his egoistic desires, he strove to attain the Creator, it seemed to him that he was ready to break through the Machsom, to do everything to reveal the Creator.
When the time comes to sacrifice yourself, your egoism, to start working with it and transform it to reveal the Creator, then a very complex, very difficult stage begins because you have to put pressure on yourself, rise above yourself, turn your egoism into altruism, i.e., to produce all kinds of anti-egoistic actions. So, people when reaching such states usually leave.
Here is the main point after which a person begins to reveal the Creator. It must be overcome. This is a psychological barrier where egoism is overcome and revelation begins.
From KabTV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah,” 4/26/20