Comment: Gulnara writes to you: “It is very difficult to unite people of different nations and faiths. I think it is impossible. They unite during difficult moments, but then, when the difficulties pass, they hate each other again. National hatred and faith exist in people just like blood flows through their veins. It is very difficult to correct people. We have gone too far to be able to fix this.”

My Response: This is true. However, we all have the single upper force, the one Creator. Therefore, we can still unite, unite in Him! Then we will not have any opportunities to escape and hide. Only in this way will we be able to reach our single root and find the right connection between us in it.

Question: Is this what a person should discover and start aiming toward?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Is it our task to tell people about this?

Answer: This is, in principle, the solution to all our problems.

Question: Then there will be no multitude of nations but only one, the nation of the Creator, right?

Answer: Yes, just humanity.

Comment: Humanity.

I think we are getting closer to it. Of course, we still need some blows and disappointments.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/1/21

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New Life 1312 – How To Establish Good Communication Between Parents And Their Adolescent Children
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz

We are all egoists and if we want to communicate, we need to adapt to each other by making mutual concessions. Building a family connection requires that each member of the family understands human nature. Parents should consult the kids about their family relations, which will help the kids to cope with conflict and reach agreements. Teens shouldn’t be suffocated or pushed to share their feelings. They need limits, freedom, and guidance. They need to know that they always have a protective shelter and a warm, loving home in order to feel secure.

Parents also need to set an example by showing the kids how they cope with anger and calm themselves down. Parents also need to show the kids that they don’t always think alike and that, sometimes, one of them identifies with the kids. We need to make children aware that the role of the family is to help them to grow successfully.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1312 – How To Establish Good Communication Between Parents And Their Adolescent Children,” 7/11/21

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Question: How can we work with people in order to bring them closer to an integral state?

Answer: Through conversations with them and between themselves about the meaning of life: “Why do we have such questions? Why, during the many thousands of egoistic developments of mankind, have we come to such a state when we have no idea where to develop further?”

Although the new generation is still striving for money by inertia, in principle, it is already beginning to show its fatigue and unwillingness to develop in the same form.

We see that egoism is no longer the driving force behind our development. We are ready to bury ourselves in our apartments with our phones and have no connection with anyone. The egoistic force of our development leads us to something completely opposite to it. Where did it come from? Why? Etc.

In general, there is a whole technique when, with the help of such clarifications, people begin to understand that the next level of development is supra-egoistic. It is aimed at ensuring that in unity we begin to comprehend the hidden nature—not inanimate, vegetative, and animate, but spiritual.

In principle, despite the fact that we are so developed, we are animals because we use the same egoism as all the previous levels—still, vegetative, and animate—only in a more exaggerated form. We must go to the next, collective level, Adam, to which the whole of humanity is gradually moving.
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From KabTV’s “Videoconference”

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Society should properly realize itself relative to the younger generation. It should give them the right example, act it in front of them.

Let us say we are spoiled people, we neglect each other. But we must play like a correct family, in the right relationships with each other, and show the children how much we love them in one case, and in another disapprove of them. All this should be done very gently because we ourselves still need to be educated.

The mass media and all educational institutions should be involved in this. Such educational programs should be specially implemented in schools, kindergartens, and at work. Our most important problem is educating the next generation, the next humanity. If we do it correctly, we will properly educate our children and grandchildren, then they will their own, etc.

The problem of mass education arose for the first time now. We see that we have reached the end of the line, our children are turning completely away from us.

Nevertheless, we are capable to properly educate them. But to do this we need to fully mobilize all our resources and understand that education is the most important thing.

If we do this, then thanks to our children, we will eventually correct ourselves. This is what the Torah says: “You return the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to the fathers.” It is in this way that the children will force us to correct ourselves.

By correcting ourselves for their sake, we will correct them as well, and achieve the correct, normal, good state of all mankind. Then the whole of nature will shine in a different way because a person will enter into harmony, into balance, with it.

I believe that the state we are in today—drugs, depression, suicide, and most importantly the younger generation, which completely disconnects from us and absolutely does not want to deal with us—will force us to rebuild. Not even crises but just this.

As a result, a person will begin to understand that I am nobody, I am alone, I am despised and repelled even by my children. This will be experienced by us very painfully and will force us to turn our hearts to them, as it is said in the Torah.
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From KabTV’s “Close-Up. Marriage contract” 8/19/09

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New Life 1311 – Quarrels Between Siblings
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Yael Leshed-Harel

There cannot be contact and connection without feeling limitations and conflict with others. Siblings don’t feel each other if they don’t quarrel, but they may have difficulties with communication. Fighting over toys is natural between toddlers, and parents should not intervene as long as there is no physical harm. If a child cries to his parents that his sibling has done something to him, the parent can hug him, but shouldn’t take sides.

Quarreling for the sake of harming others is unacceptable, but otherwise it is a part of normal life. Quarrels strengthen the connection and love between us if we know how to rise above the feeling of rejection. Parents should not fight and should play with their children to provide an example of how to behave properly. To sum up, we should let siblings develop freely in order for them to become experienced and wise.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1311 – Quarrels Between Siblings,” 7/4/21

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My new article on Linkedin “Setting Higher Goals for Our Children This Summer”

After a disruptive school year caused by Covid restrictions the long-awaited summer break is here. In order to reintroduce some kind of learning framework to children this summer, an overwhelming majority of large school districts in America are providing summer school programs. If implemented correctly, it is the right move. Excessive free time is a recipe for disaster.

Around 97 of 100 districts across the U.S. are offering summer school programming, in-person, virtually, or a combination of both. The plans include recreational trips, outdoor activities, and artistic programs according to monitoring educational organizations. After the challenging circumstances imposed by the pandemic, these measures could be an example for other societies around the world.

Children should not feel that they have so much free time that they have no idea what to do with themselves and hours seem to stretch endlessly. They need to have their time organized so that they will be happy with the built-in agenda, and understand that the expected plans are exactly what they want and need. Otherwise we spoil them.

There is nothing worse for them than free time with a huge void wasted lying on the couch, staring at the screen, or wandering around in the street. Children are not used to having free time and filling it themselves, so giving them “freedom” is like teaching them not to do anything. Children have desires and thoughts, all kinds of natural impulses, and we sort of tell them, “Do nothing with your drive or aspirations. What are they good for? What benefit will you get from them?”

There is of course time to rest, but it is not advisable to lie on your back for hours or walk around aimlessly. Playing football or dancing after studying geography for example, can be a break. Anything that is different from the intense action that preceded it is called resting.

If children are left without studies and without other activities, the impulses that are naturally vibrant in them can lead them to bad places. Parents should be greatly concerned about their children having unlimited freedom and should contemplate ways to fill their time constructively in order to further their development.

Firstly, a clear goal should be established: What do the parents want the children to achieve with their free time so they can provide enriching activities accordingly. In my opinion, the most important goal is to build the children into integral human beings, to develop a person who knows how to communicate properly with others, how to manage complex situations, how to create beautiful relationships with others, and who achieves in-depth understanding on the multiple levels in nature: inanimate, vegetative, animate, and human.

With the goal of elevating the child to a higher scale of merit as a human being—one with values, sensitivity, and consideration of others—the activities programmed for our children must have nurturing content that develops their thoughts and expands their feelings. At the end of the activity, it is valuable to promote a discussion for them to share their experiences with each other.

We should consider bringing children to the theater, to the symphony, to various museums. As a child, I lived in a city in Belarus that had a large building specifically designed for children. In the summer, I sat in a photo lab and developed pictures in a darkroom. In the winter, we went skiing together. These are only examples of some activities that could be implemented according to the conditions of each society.

Today, the schools we enroll our children in and entrust their education and a significant part of their upbringing have largely become breeding grounds for crime, violence, promiscuity, bullying, and drug dealing. Everything except what we would wish for our offspring.

A summer break where time is properly managed by parents can heal some of the hardships of the past year, but the real test of educating our children will be in the next school year. The education system, with just a few of its deficiencies touched upon, was founded about one hundred and fifty years ago. We need to think carefully about whether it is suitable for today’s world.

Let’s thoroughly examine and scrutinize what we are doing with the institution called “school” and the education we provide for our children. The scrutiny should include the appropriate plans for how to spend the next summer break. As adults, thinking about the future of our kids’ education might be a good idea on how to spend our free time this summer.
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My new article on Linkedin “Headed for Another Masked Summer?”

The summer vacation has barely begun, and we are already seeing signs that it might soon end, or at least the fun part about it. Covid-19 is returning to Israel in a big way and threatens to do this summer what it did last summer, keep us at home, or at least at a distance from each other. It seems as though nature has no mercy on the children, who only want to enjoy the summer—their brief break from a traumatizing school year riddled with corona lockdowns.

But then, why should nature have mercy on children if we, their parents, don’t? That is, through our own misconduct, we are bringing on them the lockdown that we could prevent if we only conducted ourselves more responsibly. If we were better parents, we’d do what we have to do, both regarding ourselves and regarding our children.

And what we have to do is reorganize our relationships. Otherwise, we will not be able to cope with Covid, and certainly not with the upcoming viruses that are already standing in line to plague us, and which are bound to be more troublesome than the current pestilence.

Until we learn that we must rearrange our relationships from competitive to supportive and from callous to caring, nothing good will happen. We must understand that our only cure from the virus is by healing our hearts from negative thoughts about others, developing positive ones, and connecting with the very same people we currently repel.

To connect means to understand and feel that I am dependent on others. I may live in my physical body, but the heart of this body is in someone else, not in me. And not only is it in someone else, but in everybody else besides me. In other words, each and every one of us is entirely dependent on everyone else. We don’t determine our fates, and we don’t determine our present. In fact, we don’t determine anything; our interconnections determine everything, and we only follow the dictates of this network, consciously or not.

Even if we cannot feel this right now, we should at least understand that this is so and realize that if that’s the case, then “Love your neighbor as yourself” is not some lofty motto that no one takes seriously, but our only hope of changing our lives, of shifting them toward a positive direction.

We can ignore it and continue treading the path of meanness we have nurtured so fervently for so many decades, but it won’t be long before life forces us through pain to rethink our route.

The virus isn’t our enemy; it is showing us the truth of our interdependence. Had we acted on this truth, we would not have had a pandemic whatsoever. Our social responsibility would have made us separate ourselves once we got sick until we got better, and the virus would not have spread. This, by the way, is what sick bats do in order not to infect other members of their cloud (a colony of bats). If we had their sense of responsibility, we wouldn’t be talking about the Covid-19 pandemic, certainly not two years down the line.

Because we are utterly dependent on each other, we influence each other. This is why it is so important that we monitor our feelings toward others and try to cultivate positive ones. By doing so, we will influence others, who will influence still others, even without speaking about it. Before long, that positive wave will come back to us and to our children.

We determine each other’s fate, so let’s be responsible. Let’s draw the obvious conclusion that “Love your neighbor as yourself” is our only viable option for the future. We have tried everything else and look where we are: on the verge of another masked summer. Now that it’s getting to our children, we should stop taking risks. I hope we will learn and implement this lesson that nature is trying desperately to teach us before it resorts to harsher means.
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Question: The culture of “tang ping,” a passive lifestyle without stress and careerism, is gaining popularity among Chinese youth.
“Tang ping” means “lie down and switch off.” This is a salvation from the pressure of society, which pushes young people to look for work, to work hard and to build a career, as is customary in China.

The term “tan ping” was used by the author of a post who wrote that he has not worked for the last two years and does not see this as a problem. Instead of chasing success, he decided to just “lie down.”

Do you say that this is not always bad?

Answer: This is not bad. It is best to realize—What exactly do you want? For what? Why? And only after that, if it is really worth it for you and the world—so that you do not burn fuel, so that you do not pollute the air—carefully calculate what the meaning is of your work. Do you harm the environment, including still, vegetative, animate, and human nature, society, and so on?

And after that, do this work. Figure out: what can be the result of your work. Then you will see that maybe doing nothing is really the best thing to do for all mankind. And even the fact that you exist and consume some calories is not important. You are not causing damage.

Question: But how will I provide for my family?

Answer: We will provide for you. If we do not produce excess, but only what is necessary for all of us, for all of humanity, it will be enough for us to get off the couch and leave our phone, or even not leave it, for an hour a week—a week! And everything will be fine.

Question: Will there be something to eat and a roof to live under?

Answer: Absolutely everything will be there for you. Stop all these ships and steam locomotives that dart around the world and deliver all kinds of rubbish that no one needs. Only those who make money need these pieces of paper, and then they throw them into nowhere.

Question: When you say that a person should live as necessary, does this not mean an equalization, which we have already gone through some time ago?

Answer: Equalization is when it is being imposed on you. And I don’t care., I don’t compare myself with anyone. I am not afraid that I will have the same as my neighbor. I don’t look at the fact that I have the same furniture, the same food, the same clothing—it doesn’t matter.

Question: Why do I live so that I don’t watch others? What has changed in me?

Answer: Because I have my world, internality, that I live in. And therefore I do not feel that someone is suppressing me. On the contrary, they provide me with conditions. The environment, society, all of us together provide each other with conditions for internal development. And it doesn’t require calories.

Question: When such an understanding enters, will it automatically reduce everything to the necessary, and will the necessary be enough for me?

Answer: Yes.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 6/10/21

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Question: There is nothing stronger than habit. A person’s nature, his essence, is a desire to receive that works according to a certain program: maximum enjoyment with minimum expenditure of energy. But since a person’s character cannot be changed, does it mean that habits cannot be changed either?

Answer: It is very, very difficult. This requires serious motivation, wanting to acquire some new imposed, induced habitual actions, deeds, and tastes.

Indeed, habit is second nature. We receive only some basic characteristics from nature and everything else is formed through the influence of the environment.

Comment: But we know from the science of Kabbalah that it is impossible to change a person’s nature.

My Response: But inside nature itself—what I strive for, love or hate—everything happens within the framework of our common egoism. We are programmed by parents’, society’s, and friends’ attitudes toward us.

Question: We know that a habit is an action that is directly related to pleasure or suffering.

For example, children do not like to brush their teeth, but this habit can be developed in them if you give them some kind of reward for this, which gives pleasure. When you no longer give anything for it, the action itself becomes a pleasure since without brushing teeth one suffers.

So, through pleasure and suffering, can we develop a habit in a person, but still not change his nature?

Answer: We cannot change nature. Within the framework of our nature, we can simply manifest it in certain ways, but nothing beyond that. In general, nothing is done without a reward. Nature or us, or society, something should set us to act a certain way.

Question: Can bad habits be eradicated by suffering?

Answer: Not necessarily through suffering. Any habits can be eradicated. It all depends only on how much we really want to and know the way to do so.
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From KabTV’s: “Spiritual States” 6/25/21

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Question: How can you raise a person to be simply good? At school, they tried to instill ethics and morality in us, but we can see that this does not work.

Answer: Our social and educational systems do not work because they do not have the support of society. As society becomes more open, people move further away from each other. Let’s take the very vivid example of China. It was a closed society that lived according to its own laws, different from the whole world.

Now that Chinese society is opening, it is starting to spread. There is no connection. No matter how much they try, they cannot stay together for long. Even more so, it is such a diverse, multifaceted set of people.

You cannot associate yourself with a huge number of people who are so different, incomprehensible, and inconceivable to your feelings. When it is millions, it is impossible.
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From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 6/25/21

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