Answer: First, they ask egoistically. We are trying to reach requests for altruism, the property of bestowal and love—this is the most important thing.
Second, in order to really ask correctly, we try to bring this request through the ten so that it is the same for everyone, collected and coordinated with everyone. From this Minyan (the ten), all ten people rush with one request to the Creator.
The ten is one spiritual unit. If you do not ask from the ten, then you are not a spiritual unit and the Creator does not feel you.
You often ask: “And if I myself ask for my relatives?” …Ask. In the end, you will see that the whole world does this, but nothing happens.
The request must originate from the Kabbalistic group that clearly understands that the system in which we exist is created as an egoistic one on purpose in order for us to ask only for our correction and raise this request correctly.
Question: Do the friends in the ten have to hear my words, know about them, or is it my personal inner state when, from our connection, I appeal to the Creator for them?
Answer: They do not need to hear your words. But in principle, if you ask, it is best to appeal to the Creator with the desires that have been agreed upon in the ten. Not at the moment, but in general when the ten agrees with this and would also like to participate in raising this desire to the Creator.
From the Kabbalah Lesson in Russian 11/4/18