Question: Sometimes it is absolutely clear to me that I am totally dependent on my good or bad feelings. In fact, this is the only thing that worries me, but I listen to the advice that I should ascend above that and try to justify the Creator despite everything I feel. What is my work if I see that I only care about what I feel? How should I exert myself?
Answer: You need to hate your reactions to what is going on.
Question: But I tell myself that it is my nature and therefore I have no control over it.
Answer: This is a true and simple excuse, but I must summon upon myself the influence of a different nature that exists in reality, the influence of the Creator, the influence of the Light that is in the group. Then I will feel to what extent my nature, which is to receive, is opposite from that nature of bestowal, and then I will begin to get to know it.
Question: How can I awaken the second nature?
Answer: It is through the group. I spur the powers that allow me to discover the nature of bestowal by the right attitude to the group, in the relationships between the friends who are connected in mutual love and who speak about a certain advancement that I don’t understand. I look at them and don’t understand what they engage in. I keep hearing everyone talking about the group, about connection, and about frameworks that we have to build.
I don’t understand what they need all that for. It is true that Kabbalists tell us about that, but not explicitly. It is enough. We have read about that and now we can go on to something else. I don’t distinguish the internal changes yet, and the information and the scientific interpretation of things is quite enough for me. But why do I need to change myself with regard to society?
Question: So, how can I sharpen my attitude toward the group in order to be more strongly influenced by it?
Answer: This is the reason we live in this world. It is because here we can perform actions in corporeality and not in our desire. We can feel corporeal and not spiritual shame.
I enter the group, and want to be incorporated in it and to remain there. Then I am told that in order to remain in the group, I must take part in different duties, to come to the morning lesson every day, and so forth. If you don’t want to, you must leave. There are rules, and you must participate in the group together with everyone else. This obliges me to be incorporated, to be among the friends.
Then, whether I like to or not, I find myself in a workshop where everyone talks about the fact that I must see myself as small and all the others as great. This is what is accepted in our group, and I follow the others and speak in the same vein, “Guys, you know that everyone must lower his head before the friends because this is wonderful,” and they also tell me that it is wonderful!
No one does anything yet, but the Light that Reforms operates on us in the meantime and changes us. Gradually I begin to have a new insight that if I really see myself as small, I will benefit greatly. It is actually by annulling myself that I will attain the Creator. This is why it is worthwhile.
This is an incentive to advance spiritually. Perhaps it is a private egoistic incentive, but it is an effective one. Then the environment, the teacher, the study, and the workshops begin to affect me anew. The Creator sends me increasingly more advanced, finer, and more internal new states and situations, and I must sort them out time after time in order to use them correctly for my advancement. So, it turns out that the egoistic nature is not an obstacle. We all start from it.
Question: Do these changes take place in me automatically?
Answer: These changes take place according to my exertion. If I don’t exert myself, I don’t feel the changes. In fact, the changes take place all the time, but I perceive only a small part of them (one millionth) and respond to one millionth of what I perceive. When we advance in our world, we become more sensitive, sensitive to changes.
The whole spiritual world is in very high spiritual frequencies that cannot be perceived. When we ascend toward the Light, we transcend to very high frequencies that are above the attributes of our world. This is the reason that we must be prepared for rapid changes of qualitative states.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/16/14, Writings of Baal HaSulam