Answer: The ascent to the upper depends on how much the lower can annul himself before the upper. He does it, of course, thanks to the Light that Reforms and not because of inner manipulations. He only has a clue that the Creator brings him to the right environment, to the good fate and tells him “take it!” If you manage to hold on to that point and to start working with it, you will succeed.
The ascent depends on what you consider an ascent. If you think positively about one of the friends at least once a day, unlike you have thought about him before, it’s already a great joy, since it indicates a qualitative inner change in you. You should worry that each of the ten friends in the group of ten will constantly aspire for such an ascent, and this is the mutual support and mutual guarantee. If you worry that all the friends should feel the same way and worry about one another, then your concern is conveyed to them.
This is easy for some of the friends and more difficult for others, and so we complement one another when we gather and connect. Those who find it difficult because of the hardening of the ego add power of Aviut (thickness) to the group of ten. Those who feel the ascent, which means the influence of the Light, pass this Light to the group.
The “shattering” of the vessel allows us to do this. I cannot draw the Light in my current shattered state since there is no connection between us. But I connect with the friends into one unity in which one adds the power of the coarse egoistic desire and another adds the spiritual ascent.
The Light influences those who deserve it since they are in a state of ascent at the moment and through them it affects me. Even if we are not as close as we were before and not connected as strongly into one as we were, we have made a covenant and agreed that we will hold on to the connection between us as strongly as we can and will break down the wall between us.
It turns out that the shattering is simply a gift from Above; it’s a stick that we constantly have to kiss. It allows us to be constantly connected to others and to be in contact with the Light even in the worst state. If I lose contact with the others, there is the covenant by which I stay in contact thanks to those who are in a state of ascent and can draw the Light.
Thus everyone operates with regard to the others. This special connection of the shattered desires is called “this world.” It’s not what we see and feel at all, it’s not our corporeal ego, but a system, special conditions that allow us to connect to the upper. Although we don’t deserve anything judging by our state, we still accept this connection: either according to the conditions of the covenant between the friends, thanks to our connection, or thanks to the mutual support.
The friends may lack the willpower and I add it to them by my descent, and they help me convey my deficiency and hold on, just like healthy people treat those who are ill. The mutual help that we provide for one another, this shattered state, all these conditions are called “this world,” thanks to which we contact the Light that Reforms. So the advice and guidance of Kabbalists are focused on one point: How to connect to the Light in a state of detachment.
From the 2nd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/20/13, Introduction, “Mother Lends Her Clothes to Her Daughter”