We study the role of men and women based on the system of spiritual worlds because examples can only be drawn from there, and not our world.

There are a million theories in our world, and we see that even today we still do not know the proper role of men and women; therefore, our world is so imperfect.

In the spiritual world, there is the quality of Bina, bestowal, and we must become equal to this quality. To do this, we must unite in such an integral way to be able to connect with Zeir Anpin, and then he will raise us to Bina.

This is a very complicated system with many different elements. It controls us; it emits all the signals to the souls; it launches us, and in our turn, we ascend toward it.

According to this system, there are two forces in the world: feminine and masculine. It is impossible to ascend just through one of them. Only the proper use of both of them creates the necessary conditions sufficient for ascent.

The feminine inclination forms an enormous desire. But this desire cannot be realized independently since it is just a desire, which does not have the power to realize itself.

And next to that is the next force, the masculine force.

A woman provides the need to ascend. It pushes the masculine part. It creates an enormous desire out of itself, inspires, directs, prays, and forms. It pushes men forward, like a mother sends her children to school and her husband to work. She creates the efforts, which enable them to advance, otherwise they would not have moved. Due to these efforts, the masculine part takes the feminine desire, begins to realize it, and ascends forward.

The woman is the lack of fulfillment, an enormous desire, without which nothing can exist. And the man is the force, which already turns this lack into the moving force and attains the Creator. He attains the Creator with the help of the desire he has received from the feminine part; he raises this desire, and together, they realize it.

This is the way things initially were in our world: Once a man went hunting and brought his prey home, and today he goes to work and brings home a salary. This is the way the family exists; this is the way the world is.

In our group we cannot break these natural conditions, otherwise we will not correspond to the higher structure. We must constantly be like the upper Partzuf.

Therefore, we need the women’s desire, their enormous effort, their prayer from the depth of their hearts. Women can influence men with their silent desire in such a way that men will feel like the women are screaming at them, even though in reality, they don’t say a word, but simply want.

Men have the ability to perceive the desire of a woman in such a way that he will want to realize it. He must realize it; this is the way we are made. If we will direct our common desires the right way, we will absolutely reach our goal.

It is impossible to move forward without women. They start this movement; they are the first to react to the changes in the world, to our method. And men must connect between them and realize this method. Why? Because the power that pulls us forward is the power to bestow. Women need to provide the lack and the need, and men, the creation of the power to bestow.

We build our groups based on this principle.
[75174]
From the Vilnius Convention 3/23/12, Lesson 2

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Question: How important is women’s practical work? For example, how important is it for women to also take part in seminars on integration instead of doing their own thing?

Answer: Men will not be able to do anything on their own. Absolutely nothing!

They can get together, stand around, and sing as usual, these are good things, but it is just preparation. The real work cannot be without a strong women’s part generating its aspiration towards the same goal at the same time. It cannot be any other way! We see this everywhere, always. There are many examples in history. This comes from the structure of the upper Partzufim, the upper worlds; if we do not raise this desire to Malchut, it does not form, and without it, nothing happens. So women must take this very seriously.

First, I direct my attention towards the women’s part because everything starts with it. I really ask you to understand that here practically everything depends on the woman. Men can be “launched,” they can be manipulated, and women know this very well. The right way of manipulating men is based on seriously directing them towards the goal; a woman can literally do this with her desire alone, with just one word, with anything she does. It is very easy for her, and for men, it is very difficult, basically impossible, to advance on their own.

This is why there has always been a law in Kabbalah that unmarried men are not taken as students. This is because without the desire of a woman near you thinking about your succeeding, you will not be able to advance seriously.
[75171]
From the Vilnius Convention 3/23/12, Lesson 2

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If there were no spark of bestowal inside the desire to enjoy, it would not develop. How did a human being evolve from an ape? An ape operates purely by instinct, and a huge question arises: How in the process of evolution, from what type and kind, and in what way did a human suddenly appear? How could he develop from an animal?

His desire to know the upper force, his Creator, raises a human above the animal. It is explained by the presence of the spiritual spark developing inside a human being. This spark can be of four types, four levels, and that it is why there are different kinds of people more or less close to spiritual work.

If the spiritual spark begins to speak inside of my desire to enjoy, I already have two qualities—one against the other. I can compare them and decide what to do: to work for the sake of my egoism or for the sake of the spark of bestowal.

The spark of bestowal can bring my desire to enjoy a great gain. If we had been guided only by the desire to enjoy, we would have remained animals that do not evolve. But if we have the spark carrying the force of bestowal, we begin to use it to our advantage. Thus humanity developed.

In the beginning, a man used to bring his prey to his cave only for his family. But then he saw that it was too much, and his family could not eat everything. Then he gave a half to his neighbor and exchanged it for something useful. The egoistic desire was constantly growing, and he did not want to just share with everyone; thus, began mutually beneficial exchange.

The desire to enjoy was growing, the desire to bestow was increasing at the same time, and a human was getting smarter. He invented trade and markets, which exists to this day. Only it stimulated all our development, as it is said: “Go and earn money from each other.”

But this was not the main gain, it was the qualities that we learned from each other in the course of this trade. Thus, the desire to enjoy was growing due to the presence of the desire to bestow in it.
[75193]
From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 4/11/12, “The Gate of Intentions”

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According to our nature, the nature of a created being, connection exists only among men. Women don’t connect among themselves because their egoism is of a special kind. That is neither good nor bad.

It is important to work in our original nature without trying to damage it. It is important to work with the material we have been created with and understand that we’ll reach the goal only by using our nature properly.

By putting men and women into one group, in the process of working together we feel a different connection among men than among women.

It is not felt as much in real life as in our integral methodology lessons. Literally, in a half an hour to an hour of common studies, the men’s part starts feeling that their nature is ready to go forward and be connected with everyone while women’s part feels incapable of working toward getting closer to each other.

The best result is achieved by women supporting men with their intention and efforts while men get closer to each other.
[75180]
From the Vilnius Convention 3/23/12, Lesson 2

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Preparation to the Lesson
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Writings of Rabash “Show Me Your Respect”
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Zohar for All – Passover “Bo (Come Unto Pharaoh),” “And It Came to Pass at Midnight,” Item 129
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Writings of the Rabash “Dargot HaSulam”
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