Question: Why is the process of correction so slow?

Answer: The process of correction isn’t slow at all. We simply don’t know all of nature. No one knows by how many billions of ties he is connected to others and what layers are concealed in the depth of his desire.

A person doesn’t feel his desires and attributes at all, thinking that he has nothing but the beastly urges that he feels inside. But the upper Light influences us, cleans us, and arranges all the lower layers of our desire.

Just imagine: You are studying now, but what are you actually doing? You are sitting in your physical, beastly, body, looking at a book and at best studying 1% of what is written there. And in your beastly corporeal mind, in your egoistic desire, you determine how to use it all in the best way for your own benefit.

But at the same time, you have a certain connection with the method of correction (the Torah), even if it is egoistic. It isn’t Lo Lishma yet because you are only thinking of how to gain, how to rise above everyone else. But still, there is already a certain connection between your corporeal, egoistic layers and the Torah because you were brought to study, and now you are looking at the book, even if you don’t understand anything in it.

The connection already exists even if you, in your beastly eyes, are trying to read what is written about another world and to use that world egoistically. Even by such contact with the source, you already receive some illumination from it. This Light begins to change you internally, in the depth of your egoistic desires, not only on the animate level, but even on the still and the vegetative ones. It operates on you and constantly changes you, while you are making efforts which may be totally in Lo Lishma, like a complete egoist.

While the Light operates on those deep layers from which you connect with it, you want something that is totally different: to feel and to understand where these changes are taking place. You want to swallow the Surrounding Light, to receive it inside your egoistic desires, and to enjoy it.

In the meantime, it corrects you from the inside, from the depths of your lowest egoism, into bestowal. For the time being you don’t feel these changes because they take place inside you unconsciously. But gradually by these corrections, you will experience a change in your thoughts and desires, and will begin to think that you really want to reach the love of others and even bring contentment to the Creator.

Therefore, you should not resent the fact that there is no Light now. The Light will come the moment you begin to demand it in full force, the moment you want it to control you and for the attribute of bestowal to reside within you. But as long as you don’t want it, and you don’t even know what you want, what revelation can there be? There is no deficiency for it!

These desires are deeply concealed at the moment, but don’t worry, they are constantly being corrected by the Light. This is such a long path because we don’t make enough efforts. But the whole process could be greatly hastened.
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From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/20/2012, Shamati #6 

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