Question: What kind of gifts should we give to a friend?

Answer: Show him such signs of attention that he understands that you are doing this for the sake of advancing with him to the Creator, to rise together with him.

It can be any kind of gift, expensive or cheap, small, just some kind of token of attention, completely immaterial and insubstantial. It does not matter.

Question: What is the best gift for you?

Answer: I do not need anything material. There is nothing that I would like. The best thing is when the student understands what kind of work I want to see from him and performs it. This is all.

Question: Should he get feedback that this is exactly what you need?

Answer: Yes, I will tell him.

Question: But can you tell him the exact opposite so that the person will not be proud?

Answer: As a rule, I say that I really need it, and I am not lying or flirting. He should be next to me, feel, or even ask me when I need something, for example, to translate something, put together or correct something from the material that the world needs. Nothing else!

If a student wants to please me, he himself must succeed in his advancement, which means to be a teacher, organize groups, and engage in dissemination.
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From KabTV’s “I Got a Call. Best Gift for Laitman” 12/21/13

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Question: How do we know when and what question we can ask you?

Answer: It is impossible! To do this, you need to understand what state I am in, what can be revealed, what cannot be revealed, and so on. The answers to the questions are given in accordance with the needs of society, general and personal ones, the needs of individual groups, the world group, and the entirety of humanity.

All this changes like water in a raging sea, it flows and moves in different directions. Everything is unpredictable.

Comment: It sometimes happens that one can prepare for a lesson and just go through the questions. But when we adjust to your condition, the answer can be much more effective.

My Response: Of course. But do not buy me by saying that you can adjust to me, and you will be effective, and so on. To do this, you need to feel what I feel, and be in the same state, direction, rhythm, and movement. Then you will feel that now is the time to ask a question.
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From KabTV’s “I Got a Call. Ask a Kabbalist a Question” 3/6/13

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Michael Laitman, On Quora: “How do you cope with anxiety?“

One of my students told me that when he discussed his anxieties with someone close to him, like his wife or a close friend, then he found that the moment he started opening up to them, the anxiety decreased—even before he received any advice or support.

Togetherness definitely decreases anxiety. There is a saying in the wisdom of Kabbalah that “a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved,” i.e. when we share a sensation, we divide it up, and it in turn becomes more manageable.

Since it is quite easy to see how sharing our experiences lessens our negative feelings, the question is why do we not use this ability more? Why is it so hard for us to share our anxieties with others?

We are indeed afraid of opening our hearts, letting everyone see that we have certain fears and anxieties. In addition to whatever anxieties we hold within, we usually have additional anxieties about sharing them with others, that it might cause others to perceive us as weak. Since society in general values stronger, smarter, wealthier and fitter individuals, opening up our anxieties to such a society makes us vulnerable to exploitation. We thus need to seek a social environment that would not exploit us for opening up, but would rather give us a sense of faith and confidence that it can help us cope with any negative feelings.

A social setting that can guarantee faith and confidence in its members is one that actively draws itself to the upper good and benevolent force—the force of love, bestowal and connection. It is this very same force that awakens negative feelings in us, whether they be fears, anxieties or several other painful sensations, in order for us to draw closer to that force, and we do so by drawing closer to each other.

If we wish to connect with the upper force and let its perfect quality of love, bestowal and connection fill our lives with a sensation of faith and confidence, then we need to emulate such a quality toward each other—giving others a sense of faith and confidence, and for them to do the same toward us. By wanting to positively connect with each other, we then start awakening the positive force dwelling in nature into the connections we create, and we then feel a new sense of faith and confidence wash away any anxieties that we might be holding within.
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Based on the video “How to Cope With Fear and Anxiety” with Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman and Oren Levi. Written/edited by students of Kabbalist Dr. Michael Laitman.
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash.

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Preparation to the Lesson

Zohar for All “Introduction to The Book of Zohar,” “Mother Lends Her Clothes to Her Daughter” 

Writings of Baal HaSulam “The Freedom”

Selected Highlights

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Michael Laitman, On The Times of Israel: “Human Rights Day Misses the Most Important Right”

Every December, there is a lot of talk in the media about human rights because the Human Rights Day is observed by the international community on December 10. Human Rights Day commemorates the day in 1948 when the United Nations General Assembly adopted the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

The declaration sets out a broad range of fundamental rights and freedoms to which we are all entitled, such as the right to freedom, equality, dignity, personal safety, education, and work. Regrettably, there is one fundamental right to which all of us are entitled, but none of us has because we are oblivious to it. Nevertheless, without it, we will have none of the other rights.

The thing is that one, fundamental fact determines everything in our lives: We are all connected to each other and dependent on each other. Since we do not know it, or do not want to know it, we violate each other’s rights left and right, without realizing that by doing so, we are corrupting the very fabric that sustains and nourishes us. Therefore, our most basic right, which is just as much our duty, is to feel that we are each other’s lifelines.

Whether we like it or not, we are all in this together. The general law of nature is “One for all and all for one,” and it is inescapable. The sooner we realize this, the sooner we will begin to live accordingly.

We do not exploit our children or deprive them of basic needs. On the contrary, we try to provide them with everything they need, and then some, because we feel them as extensions of ourselves. Likewise, if we felt that everyone around us is also an extension of ourselves, because this is the truth, we would not exploit them.

Right now, we must fight for the used and abused around the world precisely because we feel disconnected from others. Until we solve that sense of disconnection, we will not eradicate exploitation and the struggle for human rights will be futile and useless. If anything, it will benefit only those who gain fame and fortune presenting themselves as the champions of the poor when in fact they profiteer on their tormented backs.

Because the realization of our mutual dependence is essential for mending the ills of human society, I always insist that education for connection is the single most important and urgent initiative that we must take. It must come before anything else because again, if we know that we are dependent on each other, we will not hurt each other and human rights will not be abused anywhere. Conversely, if we are unaware of our interdependence, we will always find ways to exploit one another, and even organizations that purport to fight for the poor will actually be perpetuating their misery in order to increase their own wealth and power.
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An attempt to connect with other people in order to reveal the quality of bestowal and love in oneself, as in the Creator, leads a person to despair that he cannot do it. Accordingly, this state leads him to ask the Creator to connect his heart with other people.

Just sitting and justifying some states that pass through us does not give anything. Many people suffer and are in terrible conditions, but they do not see the right way out of them that would lead to the goal.

Question: As an egoist is it correct to say that my task is not just to justify the Creator for what He does to me, but to come to a “broken heart” when I actively try to acquire the quality of the Creator and despair of not being able to achieve this, and ask the Creator to help me?

Answer: Yes, this is the most correct state. That is why it is said: “There is nothing so whole as a broken heart.”

Question: But how much strength does a person have? It takes years until he turns to the Creator because he is trying to do everything himself.

Answer: Baal HaSulam writes that it may take 20-30 years.

Question: So is this some kind of cumulative process?

Answer: Yes. But do not reassure yourself that it is accumulating. We must go forward and try to achieve this every day.
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From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 11/27/22

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Question: There is a principle in spiritual work: “Do not give up on mercy.” It turns out that the Creator is waiting until the person cries out. He is waiting for our prayers that will come out of the broken and shattered heart. Who wants to go through such states? Is this the reason that so few people study Kabbalah?

Answer: The merciful and loving Creator about whom it is said that He loves us and wishes only good to everyone. He is the one who brings a person to such states where a person is forced to turn to Him from inevitability and despair.

Why does He have to drive us to this point? It is because we exist in the state opposite to the Creator, in egoism, in the property of receiving. However, the Creator exists in the property opposite to us, in bestowal. Therefore we are polar opposites.

Thus, we can get closer to the Creator only if we change, or try, or at least want to change, our egoistic desires to receive into altruistic desires to give.
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From KabTV’s “Spiritual States” 11/27/22

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In this world, a man rules over a woman, but in the future a woman will rule over a man, as it is written: “A woman will rule over a man.” (Midrash Tehilim).

Question: This is some kind of internal statement. What is “a woman will rule over a man in the future”?

Answer: Of course, we mean human desire, which is called feminine. It will be corrected and therefore it will rule.

Question: Could you explain this phrase more simply: “Today a man rules a woman, and in the future a woman will rule a man”?

Answer: I think that is where we are heading, and we understand that. We see that the world is changing gradually. Women go through all kinds of organizations and occupy various very serious posts.

It is no secret that the woman is superior in the house, and so it is written in the Torah.

Question: And you say that according to this statement, we men will concede to this?

Answer: Men will give in to this. In general, a man inside himself is ready for this. There is a lot left in him from the boy who is raised by his mother. It is in each of us. And that is why I think that all this will come out and be realized by everyone in such a prominent, correct form.

Comment: Now when we see how wars, conflicts, and so on are developing, there is a lot tied to the male part.

My Response: That is why there are wars and conflicts. If women rule the world more, there will be fewer wars, fewer conflicts, and fewer problems in general.

I do not mean the type of women who get out into the streets and scream, but rather the real women who are aware of themselves as wives and mothers. They lead families, take care of families, children, the future, and so on. It is practically not a man’s job; it is more a woman’s job.

Question: Is taking care of the country more of a woman’s job?

Answer: Female, any care is a woman. And any fulfillment of a woman’s desire is a man.

Question: Do you connect it? A woman—the house and a woman—and the head of the country?

Answer: Of course. It is the same thing.

Question: So she suddenly feels everyone as her children? Everything is like her house?

Answer: Yes. Who else can think about it?

Question: Where do you find such women? Please tell me.

Answer: They will appear, and they exist. We just need to give them a place to advance a little. And they are already moving forward today, but the men are still pushing. But it is all a matter of time.

Question: So you are in favor of this?

Answer: Yes!

Comment: There will be a lot of resistance, I think.

My Response: And I do not see a single man who could do more good for the world than women, than women’s governance.

It is not today; it is gradually when all this hubris, pressure, shouting, and so on will come down. When men will not goad women, direct them at each other, and so on. Meaning, both sides need to grow here. But in general, there is in the female character a predisposition to peace, to the convenience of everyone, to proper upbringing, and so on.

Question: How can we educate such women? Will they themselves be brought up in accordance with what is happening? How will they advance? How will they feel what you say, that the world is home?

Answer: We have to do it. This has to be done by us. We Kabbalists, who understand how to act and who are not shy or afraid, who are not ashamed, will say what is necessary.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 11/3/22

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Question: You say that being physically in a group does not mean that a person is really in it. Does it mean that this is not a criterion?

Answer: Of course. The desire for connection is the criterion.

Question: How should one treat the friends in the group? I do not know if they want to connect or not? A person can sit silently and that is it.

Answer: Yes, it is difficult to understand. But there are various indications whether he is included in the work along with the rest.

By nature, we are all different: phlegmatic, choleric, etc. Is it possible to say that a choleric person is directed forward more than a phlegmatic person? This is just the way they express themselves externally. Internally, both can be with the same desire, but one will be speaking slowly and doing something, while the other will be rushing from corner to corner. So what? How can you evaluate this?

Question: But the evaluation itself is not to bring them under any category. Let’s say there are criteria: an internal group, a young group, and some other layers. Who generally makes decisions, and how is a person’s readiness established?

Answer: I do not know. It is none of my business because it is a group. They have a teacher, this is me, and together with them we analyze the sources, the articles of Rabash, who wrote a lot on this topic. They know these sources and have repeatedly gone through all the articles. Now let them implement them.

I only set general lines or inspire students to take some action. I cannot tell them how to do that exactly. They must do everything themselves.
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From KabTV’s “I Got a Call. How Are People Admitted to a Group of Kabbalists?” 12/12/13

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