Question: What is the point when the light spreads and an attribute that is opposite from the desire to receive emerges in a person, how is it felt?

Answer: An opposite quality emerges when a person can fully perceive the direct light internally, when a desire to resemble the light emerges in him, and he demands the attribute to resist the attribute of receiving from the light, which is the property of bestowal.

In other words, when I feel that I receive from the Creator and that He is bestowing, and, with the help of the right environment, I find the powers in me to stop using the attribute of receiving and to begin to engage only in bestowal, I actually perform a Tzimtzum. Having restricted my ego, I create a special quality in me called a Masach through which I reject the filling that comes to me from the Creator because I want to resemble Him and His state. On the other hand, if I receive from Him, I reject His message to me. At this point, special conditions begin to appear between us. I realize that if I reject what the Creator wants to give me, it is actually a major transgression because the Creator’s pleasure is the filling of the created beings, while the outcome of my efforts is that I do not receive anything from Him.

Suppose I am a guest of a good host and I reject the delicacies he has prepared for me, and, by that, I seemingly distance myself from him. I could sit by the host and receive from him and rejoice in the fact that I am filled by him and thus make him happy and fill him. So how can I not receive from the Creator if this is His will? The point is that there is a certain action here that if I reject the Creator’s filling, I attain the goal, which is to be equal to Him, to resemble Him. By this action I do not reject the actual filling, the Creator’s desire to fill me, to raise me, but instead I reject only the pleasure from the direct filling. I want to enjoy being similar to the Creator.

This is the uniqueness that we find hard to perceive, but it is very fine, crucial, and essential. We are struggling over wanting to resemble the Creator. This means that my desire to receive should have the same direction, the same intention, as His bestowal. This is what we do in order to fill each other. If the Creator bestows unto me with the intention to please me, I will not receive the pleasure so I will be able to get closer to Him and to bring Him pleasure by my getting closer to Him. This is the first phase of the action.

It is only in the second phase that I can begin to receive from the Creator to the extent that I have gotten closer to Him. Here I already become totally like Him. This is the state we need to reach. It is not an easy action, and it is made of four steps according to the development of the four phases of the desire. This is the reason that it is very hard for us to understand this, although later the essence becomes clear to us.

At the beginning, however, a person cannot figure out how to reject the pleasure, to refuse to receive the delicacies, but, by that, we actually get closer to Him and not further away from the landlord. I say to the landlord, “I want to be closer to you without receiving anything. Let us annul the condition that you give and I receive, because when I do not receive, I am closer to you. It is only when I get closer to you that I will be able to begin to receive, because then the reception will actually be aimed at building up greater closeness between us, adhesion between us.”

These four phases are very difficult to perceive by people before they begin to act. But this is how it is arranged by nature where the four-phase executable software of how a person resembles the Creator is concealed.
[261579]
From Kab TV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah,” 2/16/20

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