The War Of The Sexes, Part 3

Laitman_095Battle In The Kitchen

Question: Why do men and women always argue with each other?

Answer: Because we don’t understand that we are created differently precisely in order to complete one another. Instead of solving this problem, we run away from it like kids. As a result, the problem grows and pressures us so much that family starts to fall apart.

We are moving away from each other and don’t want to marry and have children. We hide from solving the problem because we don’t know how to solve it and don’t realize that this is the main thing we need to do. If we would reach a solution and complete each other, we would come to eternal and perfect life. These are not just nice words. At least we would feel perfection in our earthy existence in this world, heaven right here and now.

But now, instead of completing each other, we are at war, wishing to take control the opposite sex. Our egoism doesn’t allow us anything else even if we love our partner.

Perhaps I am ready to bow and accept the authority of my spouse but only on condition that she understands how to be in charge of me. It has a special joy like a child basking in its mother’s hands.

Question: What do a man and woman want to win in this war of the sexes?

Answer: They are both egoists and wish by all means to take authority over the opposite side. A woman wants a man to serve her and a man wants the same from a woman. Only each of them expresses it in a different form. A man demands to have all necessary things at home because woman is home. And a woman demands a man to think about her all the time, to be completely devoted to her as if she is the queen of the world.

This is a simple earthly egoistic psychology that every couple follows, from the most loving to the most unsuccessful. In fact, in every case, they are two egoists that find themselves on the same territory, and so they fight with each other.

They must be connected with each other; they are bound by common children, property, and social status, and therefore each of them constantly fights for his independence in the family only in a different form. A woman likes to be dependent on a man, but she also expects that he will be endlessly devoted to her and be around her all the time.

This desire is impossible to fulfill. A woman wants a man to constantly fill her, meaning to think and take care of her, her children, the house, and for all his life to be devoted only to taking care of the family nest. And a man is ready to take care of it to some extent, but, at the same time, he wants to feel independent and not so bound, as the woman demands. And here naturally the conflict arises.

A man wants a woman to be devoted to the children and the house, and to take care of her husband as much as possible, without restricting his freedom.
From KabTV’s “A New Life” 3/31/16

Related Material:
The War Of The Sexes, Part 2
The War Of The Sexes, Part 1
Man And Woman, Unity Of Opposites

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