Sometime after we reach a group, we hear that it is up to us to work on the connection between us, to become “as one person with one heart,” meaning to reach Arvut (Mutual Responsibility). So, we try to get closer to each other. For this, everyone needs to make some preparation.
Sometimes it takes several months and sometimes years until a person hears that it is only within the connection between friends, within a group, between people, that the Creator, the characteristic of bestowal, is revealed: the Kli and the Light.
It takes a lot of time until a person ultimately begins to work on the connection, on the importance of the goal, the importance of the upper force, bestowal, and the importance of the connection within which he realizes this idea, and the more effort he invests in love of friends, the stronger the rejection and various disturbances. They begin almost immediately.
There are people who are willing to endure all of the difficulties and work on the connection between them, despite all the obstacles. And others don’t realize that this is how it should be, and when they feel rejection, they don’t understand that this rejection comes from the Creator. They think that the rejection is justified, and they leave the game and quit the study.
If the person still invests effort in connection with the friends and wants to see his relationships whole and illuminated by the importance of the goal and the importance of the Creator, then with the passage of time, he begins to receive the Light that Reforms. He feels how a particular characteristic of Hafetz Hesed (Delighting in Mercy) is created within him. He already thinks less about himself and is more concerned about realizing the goal, wholeness. This is called “his father gives the white.”
The more that the person invests in holding onto the state of Bina, the state of absolute bestowal, the white of the father, the sensation of wholeness, the importance of the goal, and all the means that lead to it, the more he advances. Even though he experiences more ascents and descents, they are on the same line, the “right line.”
After that, the “mother gives the red” reaches him: criticism, the sensation of deficiency, meaning the “left line. Here, what is required of him is a confrontation, passing from left to right and from right to left. Clearly, it is up to him to yearn constantly for the right—for Hassadim (Mercy), for bestowal, for the “white,” for wholeness, for the importance of the goal, for connection with friends; whereas the criticism, the red of the mother, will arrive by itself and be revealed at the right moment and to the right degree.
So, they complement each other: the right line and the left line, wholeness and deficiency. It is up to the person to invest only as much effort as it takes to complete these lines as quickly as possible to their fullest extent, until he discovers despair within himself. After all, he will feel the deficiency all the time, the red of the mother, the left line more than the right.
As in ordinary life, we remember the unpleasant moments more than the pleasant ones since our substance is a desire for pleasure. Enjoying, is taken for granted, because it directly corresponds to my desire. If instead of the pleasure I suddenly get suffering, lack of pleasure or pain, the negative content in my desire, it is natural to think that it was undeserved. After all, I expected something else.
So, in a person’s opinion, the left line always overpowers the right. He must fulfill these two lines as quickly as possible, until a prayer erupts from him to the “middle line,” that the Creator will reconcile his condition. He asks for help because he is not interested in being in the left line, in the feeling of deficiency, because this doesn’t allow him to thank the Creator. It is only for this that he is asking for the middle line, clarifying the letters of his prayer and completing the right and the left so that the deficiency in both of them will cause the creation of the middle line.
From this moment on begins the Ubar (Fetus) state. “His father gives the white, mother gives the red and the Creator gives the soul,” that is the beginning of the spiritual Ibur (Conception).
From the preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/19/14