Question: If I know that I am searching for eternal happiness contained in bestowal, but I am not yet feeling it, what should my artificial appeal be like?
Answer: We need to talk more about the qualities we don’t yet possess but are playing with like children. Except that a child perceives his game to be the most serious and real thing, and he grows due to this fact. While when I am playing, I know that this is not serious and not real. Herein lies the whole problem.
If I were able to invest more of the heart and mind into this game, I would be receiving more benefit from it. Although however it may be, the game works nevertheless. The Light is influencing me and I am changing.
Most importantly, one needs to continue. As it is written: “Let anything happen, whatever may come, only do not leave,” and then you will come to it. The Light will keep influencing you ever stronger each time. And even though it may require years, in the end you begin to notice changes inside of you, to value the quality of bestowal, and to move forward with it.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/26/2011, Writings of Rabash