I am the desire to enjoy. This is the only quality I was created having, and so I exist in it. However, I also have the ability to attain bestowal by uniting with this quality.
My essence will always remain the desire to enjoy. I cannot change it; I can only control it through the force of bestowal that I receive from outside. If the Creator will become important enough for me, then I will then start using my nature for His sake.
The way to receive the quality of bestowal is from outside, with the help of the Light. We can do this because we have a memory of this quality, which we used to have before we fell into egoism. This is why the quality of bestowal can reawaken in us under the influence of the Light.
This is exactly why I am referred to as man (Adam), because eventually I can and must become like the Creator. (In Hebrew, Adam comes from the word “Dommeh” – similar.)
So, what I have to do is to consciously use the Light so it will bring the quality of bestowal back to me. At the same time, my desire to receive pleasure will remain the same. Yet, the quality of bestowal can grow inside me so much that it will become more important and will control the quality of receiving pleasure.
The two qualities – reception and bestowal – never change. The only thing that changes is their balance inside a person. The stronger of the two qualities controls him.
It’s like a magnet that holds up a piece of metal: While the magnet is working, it holds the piece of metal suspended in the air, as if it were “spiritual.” But as soon as the magnet lets go of the piece of metal, the latter immediately falls back into quality of absolute egoism.
(From Part 2 of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson, on “Preface to the Sulam Commentary”)