In the News (The Guardian): “Several Indian states are considering implementing a controversial two-child policy and incentivising sterilisation as a means of population control.

“The state of Uttar Pradesh, India’s most populous state with a population larger than Brazil, has announced draft legislation which would see anyone with more than two children denied state benefits, subsidies and government jobs. After a family has two children, there will also be incentives if one of the parents undergoes voluntary sterilisation.”

Question: Do you think such initiatives are correct?

Answer: We must not sterilize people like animals. People need to figure out themselves how to regulate the number of children they will have and why they do it.

Question: Are you suggesting a serious educational process?

Answer: Nothing will work without it, not laws or coercion, only creating a framework that a family would be proud of the fact that it brings up not a large number of children but rather special children.

Question: This revolution in thinking must take place by providing them with education?

Answer: Of course! And it will happen anyway. Otherwise, look at what kind of country it is! I was in India, I was in China, and I saw a big difference between people.

Question: Should it be carried out not by a bill on limiting the number of children, but by constant, structured education?

Answer: Yes.

Question: It is interesting that in Europe everything is the opposite, they have to subsidize families to have children. Yet, in countries like Africa and India, families must be subsidized to have fewer children. Why is this happening? What is this different way of thinking in people?

Answer: It is all based on religious beliefs and principles.

Question: Why does a highly educated person, let’s say, with three or four degrees, want fewer children?

Answer: He wants quality instead of quantity. He understands that the main thing is quality. He wants his descendants to be educated, to understand, know how, what, what they live for, create the right environment around them, and put their children on their feet in turn.

Question: And if people would voluntarily have many children and give them good education, is this a cultural feature? Do they do this consciously? Do you welcome this?

Answer: Of course.

Comment: Our people always had many children.

My Response: First of all, it was a small nation. Second, one did not replace the other. People were encouraged to have a large number of children, but every person, every child, at least every boy, had a teacher who educated him. The family has always been proud of the fact that its children, sons, as a rule, were educated. “Look how many pages he knows by heart!” And so on.

That is, it was like a highest ideal, a reward, approval. Everyone aspired for a child to become a sage.

They do not have that there.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/15/21

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“We do not inherit the land from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children.” (Native American Proverb)

This should force you to prepare everything for the next generation. This is why you live in the present generation. We live to prepare the ground for the next generation. In every sense.

Question: Why don’t we feel this way? And we taint…

Answer: Our egoism obscures this elementary truth from us.
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From KabTV”s “News with Michael Laitman” 7/15/21

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Baal HaSulam, “Peace in the World“: This is the key to understand the weakness of world reformers throughout the generations. They regarded man as a machine that is not operating properly and needs mending, meaning to remove its broken parts and replace them with working ones.

The fact is that there is nothing faulty in a person and nothing needs to be changed in him. Everything was given to him by nature, so different negative attributes, and even the desire to kill, to rob, etc. were all given to him by the Creator.

The correction is not locking a person in jail or hanging him but integrating him in frameworks in which he can understand that he needs to correct his internality so that he would feel an impulse to connect to others above his most negative impulses regarding others.

A person needs to ascend to the next level without destroying his negative attributes, and he must acquire positive impulses instead of his negative impulses in relation to others.

When he displays his negative and positive impulses this way, he will begin to feel the spiritual state between them like between the negative and positive poles of the same field. Then he will begin to feel the upper world.
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From KabTV’s “Fundamentals of Kabbalah” 7/7/19

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Question: Is it necessary for a person who is on the spiritual path to marry or get married?

Answer: It is desirable for a man. It is not necessary for a woman.

Question: How does one understand that you are with the right person in the family? This refers to the husband and wife.

Answer: This is the person who does not interfere with your spiritual work, supports you in this, maybe even sympathizes and takes part himself.

Question: How can a couple who begins to study the science of Kabbalah unleash the potential of a child?

Answer: Sometimes talking about these topics in front of a child, giving him books from our Internet library and thus determining whether he is interested in Kabbalah. I think that something will interest him.

Question: So, a child, like an adult, has some kind of freedom of choice in this?

Answer: Of course. After all, no one forces him.

Question: Can we learn something from a child in our spiritual development?

Answer: Usually children give parents many such examples. So adults have this opportunity.
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From KabTV’s “Kabbalah Express” 7/19/21

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New Life 1315 – Relations With Grownup Kids Who Have Left Home
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz

A long time before kids leave home, we need to get them used to calling their parents once a day and visiting them weekly. It is important for the parents to share what they go through, to show that they care, to ask questions, and to set an example. The parents should prepare their children for the phase of leaving home and raise them to be independent.

Kids who have not received the right preparation for life will feel weak, and will find it hard to build themselves and establish a connection with a life partner. Parents should give their children a sense of security, guidance, and a feeling that we are always there for them.
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From KabTV’s “New Life 1315 – Relations With Grownup Kids Who Have Left Home,” 8/8/21

Video: Play Now | Download

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In the News (ipso.com): “Ipsos’ What Worries the World survey tracks public opinion on the most important social and political issues across 28 countries today, drawing on 10 years of data to place the latest scores in context. This global summary report presents the top concerns around the world… .

“At a global level, over one third (36%) on average say that Covid-19 is one of the top issues facing their country, level with June, which saw a 6-point decrease vs. the month before. Unemployment is the second biggest issue across all countries at 32%, followed by Poverty & social inequality (31%), Financial/political corruption (30%) and Crime & violence (26%).”

Question: Education is not the main problem. Why do you keep saying that this is a problem?

Answer: It is the most important and only problem. People don’t understand that our upbringing will change the world. Change in the world is in the change of a person.

Question: But people have children, they see what is happening around them. Why does it not enter their consciousness?

Answer: Because it is against our egoism.

Question: For our egoism, the pandemic, poverty, and social inequality are the problem? Something that concerns only me?

Answer: Only me and I don’t care about anything else, just my own skin.

Question: How do you want to lead humanity to some kind of change?

Answer: It’s very simple, on one hand we just need to show that this is the only problem that separates us from happiness. That’s all. If we change, the world will change and everything will change: this virus will go away, and all other problems. Everything will go away.

Otherwise, there will be a long path of suffering, which will still teach us that we need to change ourselves. Changing a person is the key to changing the world. There is no escape. This is a long way of suffering until we realize it.

Question: And what will happen to a person as a result of suffering on this long journey?

Answer: He begins to realize exactly the cause of his bad state. He realizes that his egoism, his bad attitude toward others is the cause of all the problems of the world.

Question: Are you sure that as a result of suffering, a person will understand this? As a result of great suffering.

Answer: Yes, but it’s a long way.

Question: Do you think that a person will not hear now, on his own?

Answer: Some part will hear. It seems to me that today it is already possible to create such societies, such circles that would live by the fact that changing a person is the basis for changing the world.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/1/21

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Question: “What to do when your children fall below the base and do not want to ascend spiritually but continue to chase the golden calf? They say: ‘Do not teach us how to live better, help us financially.’ I want to hear Laitman’s answer, not in general, but specifically, in essence. Thank you in advance. Raya”

Answer: Dear Raya. If your children have grown up so that they are chasing the golden calf, then you should help them in some way to enter this field.

The rest is God’s will. You do not have to fully participate in this, but you must give them an initial push, you must help them at the beginning, as they are your children. It is written: “One learns specifically where one’s heart desires.”

If they really have an aspiration for something, help them a little, not hundred percent, but help normally, so to speak, push them forward. But no more than that.

Question: So I should not load them with the pursuit of spirituality? I shouldn’t tell them: “You are not looking for spirituality, you are only looking for the material. What are you doing?!”

Answer: No.

I looked at my teacher’s family and saw how calm he was about it. There were many children and many grandchildren there. He always used to let them do whatever they wanted, move out, separate, have children. This is their business. If they want to, they will be interested in life, the source of life, the purpose of life. If they do not want to, that is their business.

Question: Does that mean to let them go? Help them in whatever they want, and let them go?

Answer: Yes.

My daughter also wanted to go to a certain university, please, go. The second to a different university, no problem. The son wanted a certain direction, please. That is it. In whatever I could, I pushed them forward.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/8/21

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Comment: The world has now become a world of clips; people watch clips, listen to audio books, and read less.

But according the World Literacy Foundation: “Reading is found to decrease blood pressure, lower heart rate, and reduce stress to significant degrees. According to a 2009 study at the University of Sussex, stress is reduced up to 68% just by reading! Only six minutes of reading can slow down the heart rate and improve overall health! It calms the mind and relaxes the body. This will not only help prevent potential conditions caused by stress, but will also set a person up with a clearer mind.”

My Response: I think that reading allows a person to deepen himself, to examine himself in relation to what he is reading, to develop internally. But for the new generation, this is unrealistic.

They will not read. They cannot. We have left them such an environment that kills them completely. This is clip-thinking, only these tik toks and so on. All of this, of course, simply kills the person within a person.

Question: So where is this leading us?

Answer: Through evil, we always come to something, to the realization of evil.

Comment: But you say that we will practically not read any more.

My Response: There will be other books, other things to read. There will be more questions, more answers, more of something purposeful in nature. These will not be volumes of solid text like we used to read. I remember how I would go to the library in the fifth, sixth, seventh, and other grades: I would take three or four volumes home and read them. You return them, take the next three or four volumes, and so on.

Comment: Reading was introduced in your home was the main thing.

My Response: That is all, this is the main thing. Where else can you draw anything from?

Comment: I see that you have gone through a lot of literature and not only technical.

My Response: Mostly what was available, that is, world classics. That was all we had of course.

Question: And if we still take on and develop children today, teach them to read?

Answer: I don’t know. They would be very disconnected from modern life, from their peers.

Question: So you do not especially advise this to push the child to read?

Answer: No. Society, the environment, still shapes a person. It is just that these children grow up in such times and they should exist in it.

Question: So you cannot say it is bad or that it is good?

Answer: You cannot take them to the jungle. That is how it will seem to them with all these writers. Imagine taking them back 50 years.

Question: To read there? When they read?

Answer: In general: in culture, in communication, in all that they get from books. Therefore, they are now detached from books because of the previous society, like another language. I believe that everything will be fine and there is nothing for us to worry about. It is none of our business.

Question: Is this how nature leads and develops?

Answer: Yes, of course.

Question: What does it lead us to as a result of this generation?

Answer: Each generation grows up in the environment that generated it and shaped it, and it should develop in this way. Do not disturb it. It is just that there are a few “dinosaurs” left in the modern generation and they are preventing the modern generation from living a normal life.

Comments: And they point out: read, read, only read.

Answer: Yes.

Question: What is education then?

Answer: It is if you, along with what they know and have learned from their social networks and so on, give them an educational program: that there is a special mechanism in the world, nature, that still guides us and leads us somewhere. It would be good for us to master this mechanism. We cannot get away from it, we exist in it.

There is a science that talks about how this mechanism works and how you can master it. You cannot change it, but finding out how to adapt to its nature, learning its algorithm and how to interact with this mechanism is good. It is useful.

Question: Is this what education will be like—to interest them in the study of nature?

Answer: Yes. Today, we have more and more such questions that we dismiss because we cannot do anything about them. So, to find out why, how, for what reason nature does something to us and what we can do about it ourselves, what is in our power—this can be learned only from those states that we find in the science of Kabbalah and nowhere else. This, I think, they should add to today’s worldview.

Question: So you think that this science will come to life one way or another, sooner or later?

Answer: Instead of all the millions of volumes and everything that humanity has collected, accumulated, discovered, written, and designed for us, we need only one science—the science of Kabbalah to learn what nature wants to do with us, how it affects us, and how we can respond to it correctly, adequately, all in order to achieve pleasure, to achieve happiness, knowledge, cognition, and live our years in this state as fruitful as possible.

Each generation requires a different approach to the world.

Question: And this generation will demand the science of Kabbalah?

Answer: I hope so. I hope that this generation will not fall into a trap, will not lose itself and wake up after a couple of generations. And so that already today we will begin to understand the plan of nature regarding us.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 12/04/21

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Comment: From a letter to you: “I have a child with Down syndrome. Please tell us, how does Kabbalah treat such people? In modern medicine, this is a mistake of nature. But the Creator does not make mistakes.”

My Response: No, the Creator does not make mistakes, and this is, of course, natural. We cannot determine the cause of this pattern. But in general, it is natural, and we must accept it not as a mistake, but as the correct action of the Creator and try not to disappoint Him in this. What we get from such a patient in our close circle is for us to take care of him, help him, and make sure that this child does not feel defective.

Question: Is this especially given by the Creator?

Answer: Yes.

Question: Is it more for the parents and for others than for the child?

Answer: Of course. This is a correction of the soul.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman” 7/1/21

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My new article on Linkedin “When Our Adult Children Leave Home”

From the moment our children are born we invest everything we can in them knowing that the day will come when they will move on independently with their own lives. This transition can be a difficult one for families to make. So what is the best way to carry on relationships with adult children who have left home? What preparations should be made ahead of time towards this stage in order to keep the family connected?

From childhood, it is worthwhile to establish the habit with children of never letting a day pass without them contacting us. It does not matter where they are and what exactly they are doing, at least once a day they will call us to exchange impressions in regard to everyone’s well-being. We do not need to be the ones to call them because they might be busy and we might disturb them. It’s far better if they get used to calling us. This way, when the time comes for them to leave the house, they will have the established habit of daily contact.

From us as parents, they will hear what is happening with the rest of the family. In this way, the family connection will be maintained. Of course, physical contact will also need to be maintained, and these should become a regular routine. The home-cooking that we will prepare for them to take home will provide yet another feeling of connection to us throughout the week as well.

In general, the stage of leaving home for independent adult life is something that needs to be prepared for years. Independence is built through building an atmosphere where children learn to feel responsible, mature, and where they actually function as if they are already living in their own home, even though they are still with us. And when the day to leave home finally arrives, our job should be to provide our children with a sense of confidence and security, a feeling that they can manage on their own. We will always be there to support them, but the responsibility passes to them.

Anyone who grows up in a home with an overly pampered atmosphere, in which everything is done for them, will have a hard time getting used to independent living. Such individuals are left handicapped, not knowing how to organize basic things like food, laundry, and regular life responsibilities, not to mention complex concerns like long term relationships and starting a family of their own. Such a person will feel ill-equipped to take life in his or her own hands. In fact, if we do not provide proper education ahead of time, it will be difficult to make up for the accumulated deficit at the time they leave home.

What can be done if such a situation is the reality? Sit with your children and write a sort of life guide—a guide that is as detailed as possible, that will contain cases and consequences, what to do when things happen in a certain way, how to deal with some difficulties they are likely to encounter in life, and how to react when certain kinds of problems arise. Everything that has not been absorbed into their minds and hearts during their childhood years must now be written.

We as parents should also be prepared to face the new situation of our children leaving home, and how to adjust to being empty-nesters. When they move out on their own and have not communicated with us for a long time, we will probably feel very hurt.

Perhaps we have no right to feel hurt because this is the result of the way that we educated them. Their behavior does not mean that they intend to hurt us, but it is now only our ego that demands attention from them. Apparently, we failed to instill in them good examples of concern for others and reciprocity in relationships.

After addressing our adult children’s deficits and our own loneliness, what we can still do is to call them daily to gauge how they sound, whether they need anything, and to offer help or to give good advice. After a period of time during which they get used to us calling them, we can say something along the lines of: “We do not know if we can call tomorrow, but we would be very happy for you to call us.” And so, little by little, the habit of mutual bonding will be formed.

In a nutshell, it is a natural part of life that when our children grow and progress, they will become independent and start a new life on their own. What we need to always keep in mind is that our job is to give them a sense of security, guidance for their future life, and a sense that we are behind them no matter what. There should be a clear guarantee that although they leave our home, they never leave our hearts. And such an affirmation will be reciprocated.
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