When a person begins to study, he needs to go through all of the stages and to rise and fall so that he will feel how they influence him. One must begin to work and to deal with it. It is not possible to shout out all the time: “Why have you forsaken me, why am I helpless again, in despair and in darkness?”
These states come from Above, and it is specifically with them, that I progress, provided I go through them correctly. I must receive a feeling of rising, awakening, strength, and support from the group and must work correctly against the darkness, i.e., to transform the darkness into light.
This darkness is good, since to the extent that there is darkness, I receive freewill. I can be free! And if the Light illuminates me, then I surely am within His bestowal. The Light is higher than me. It comes, influences me, disables me, and I become anything that He wishes.
I am like a puppet on a string that plays and jumps as long as my strings are pulled, which is by the Light. The darkness symbolizes that the master has let go of my strings and I fall without any motion. I can receive awakening from the surroundings and play like that, as if I am being operated by the master.
But I will play that on my own. And of course I will receive strength from the group, but only to the extent that I invest my strength, and then I will begin to live. That is already me who is operating myself, similar to the way the Creator operates me.
One time He is operating me and one time it is me on my own. In the darkness, it is specifically me, and in the Light, it is not me but Him. This is the way I work, until the night becomes day and so that it will be me and not the Creator. I rise only to bestowal and it isn’t important what influences me, the light or the darkness.
From the 3rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/21/14, The Book of Zohar