Question: What is special about a person’s work in preparing himself for a descent; what helps him to keep the covenant he has made prior to the descent?

Answer: I depend on the Light that Reforms that must take care of me. So I need to have an absolute whole desire for this Light to sustain my complete dependence on it.

I want to be above my discernments and my feelings, but at the same time keep my eyes open. There is a certain duplicity here, a paradox. On the one hand, I want to understand, to know, and to feel everything in my reality, in my state, all the discernments in that state, and on the other hand, no matter what happens in this state and no matter how much I clarify and connect all my discernments, I have to eventually adhere to the Creator on top of this data.

This means that I want to grow above my understanding, my feeling, and see everything through my ego: above it, below it, and in it, in three discernments. I only ask that all this will not break our covenant, that I will attain devotion for the Creator despite everything, and will be filled with gladness; gladness is the right sign of our solid covenant.

If I don’t burst with such gladness, then it means that I don’t have a covenant with the Creator.
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From the 1^st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/17/13, Writings of Rabash

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