A Desire Independent Of Anything

Dr. Michael LaitmanBaal HaSulam, “The Arvut (Mutual Guarantee)”: And you evidently find that the giving of the Torah had to be delayed until they came out of Egypt and became a nation of their own, so that all their needs were provided for by themselves, without dependence on others. This qualified them to receive the above Arvut, and then they were given the Torah.

Freewill is required to be independent of anything and I must feel it as mine. It is a desire that requires me to be connected with others, but not for achievements and other such results as happens with a commando, sports teams, and so forth. I want to be linked with others to discover the higher force. I require a precise and clear desire to discover mutual bestowal and mutual love of friends so that the Creator will be revealed among us and in this form, we will feel that we are giving Him satisfaction.

All this is “depicted” and realized between us specifically if we really have this as a deficiency. This comes not from someone on the outside. No one forces me about anything. I have no personal benefit. It is only for the common good.

What we want is that through love of the people, we reach love of the Creator. This desire will bring us to “reception of the Torah.” In other words, we have an opportunity to realize this, not all at once, but gradually, of course. I discover this need more and more clearly. I get the power to develop it. Accordingly, through my link with the group, the Creator is discovered in its center. This is how we advance.

Question: How can a desire be independent of anything?

Answer: The idea is that I choose the way by myself. It is not just that the reception of Torah is delayed until the “departure from Egypt.” I was always dominated by an ego that is unaware of the spiritual world. This is not about slavery to a landlord; it is not about working from dawn to dusk to provide food for my family. In that, I am not free. Rather, I must be free in my desire to choose the right way. Pharaoh still holds me, is still revealed during the exile in the wilderness, but I already have the power to be directed toward the Creator, toward bestowal, and my desire is free.

How can this be? Have I corrected myself already? How is it possible to be free of the ego? However, in spite of all this, my desire to be directed toward the Creator in the right way is truly independent.

Question: On what does the strength of this desire depend? There are people in whom it burns, and there are those in whom it barely simmers.

Answer: Of course, awakening comes from above, and the question is, will the person realize this with the right choice? The right choice is really the right environment, a group of friends. As long as I have not entered a group, the Creator chooses for me, like we choose for an infant what he needs to eat and what he will do. However, as a child matures, we leave a little room for him, allow him to choose games, offer him the choice of an omelet or porridge. We understand that individuality is awakened in him according to his degree of maturity.

Also, on the spiritual path, according to the degree of maturity, a more conscious choice is formed. They give him this choice very simply: through adding some evil, a bad feeling. As it is written, “I created the evil inclination.” The Creator says, “If you want, I will transform it into good. You only need to ask for it.” So, it follows that, for me, the question is, should I ask Him or shouldn’t I?

In general, the higher power controls everything. All the evil forces, all the disturbances, all the external factors, everything is in His hands. All good states, all the forces of Light, also come from Him. I stand in the middle. For me, the main thing is to understand that I am linked with the higher power, and It controls me, embraces, and encloses me on all sides. So how, in all the states with which He confuses me, will I be able to want the connection with Him?

The problem is found at the edge of my perception, at the threshold of my consciousness. If I feel a faint pain, I can agree that it comes from the Creator and stimulates me to turn to Him. It is said that the Creator is “jealous.” It seems that He is jealous if I turn my attention to someone else. The moment that I forget about Him, He immediately reminds me about Himself, giving me an opportunity to choose.

So, here, there is a need to understand where to find the boundary of separation: What kind of pain or what kind of pleasure must I feel to be separated from the Creator? With this, the human being in me is measured. How much I will put the restriction and the screen on myself so that nothing will separate us?
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 5/2/13, “The Mutual Guarantee”

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