In the News (Tel Aviv University ): “Most of us think that friendship is a two-way street — but that’s true only half the time, according to research from Tel Aviv University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

“Their new joint study says only half of your buddies would consider you their own friend. People have a very poor perception of friendship ties, and this limits their ability to influence their “friends,” according to the research, published in PLoS One on March 22, 2016. …

“‘It turns out that we’re very bad at judging who our friends are,’ says Dr. Erez Shmueli, who conducted the study with Dr. Laura Radaelli, both of TAU’s Department of Industrial Engineering, in collaboration with Prof. Alex Pentland and Abdullah Almatouq of MIT. ‘And our difficulty determining the reciprocity of friendship significantly limits our ability to engage in cooperative arrangements. We learned that we can’t rely on our instincts or intuition. There must be an objective way to measure these relationships and quantify their impact.’

“The researchers conducted extensive social experiments and analyzed the data from other studies to determine the percentage of reciprocal friendships and their impact on human behavior. The team also examined six friendship surveys from some 600 students in Israel, Europe and the United States to assess friendship levels and expectations of reciprocity.

“They then developed an algorithm that examines several objective features of a perceived friendship (that is, the number of common friends or the total number of friends) and is able to distinguish between the two different kinds of friendship: unidirectional or reciprocal.

‘” Dr. Shmueli says. ‘If you think someone is your friend, you expect him to feel the same way. But in fact that’s not the case — only 50 percent of those polled matched up in the bidirectional friendship category.’

“Why is this important? According to Dr. Shmueli, influence is the name of the game.

“’Reciprocal relationships are important because of social influence,’ says Dr. Shmueli, who utilized the ‘FunFit’ social experiment in the course of the research. ‘In this experiment that analyzes different incentives for exercising, we found that friendship pressure far outweighed money in terms of motivation. We found, not surprisingly, that those pressured by reciprocal friends exercised more and enjoyed greater progress than those with unilateral friendship ties.’”

My Comment: Indeed, we only see ourselves reflected in our environment. Therefore, we need to fix this some how.. On the one hand, we see an incorrect and absolutely false world. On the other hand, we don’t want to correct the incorrect mutual relationships between us, even though it is possible to correct them.

Question: At what point would there be correct assessment of reciprocal friendship?

Answer: This would be when all of us begin to work for closeness between us, without any connection to what is happening between us. This would be when our goal becomes connection between us in the center of the circle in order to attain the next level of development, to rise to the next level of nature, of creation, of formation. Then, we would no longer have any problems.

Question: This is very difficult for people.

Answer: No, we can do this as a “guided tour” on a spiritual roller coaster, and this will be a joy. This is wild spiritual fun. I recommend this to you!

Question: Even the researchers concluded that friendship is a stronger motivation than money. So, the most useful method for attaining results in every area is to perform work together with friends.

Answer: This is what the wisdom of Kabbalah speaks about. It is up to us to work together for the sake of unity. Then, we would have everything, including money, undoubtedly! This is because the upper force that manages everything in our world, including the regulation of all of our commercial problems, only comes down to a place where unity exists.

Question: Does this mean that everything I have will be enough for me?

Answer: Even more than that.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 5/11/16

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New Life #372 – The Attributes Of The Integral Woman
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Tal Mandelbaum ben Moshe

How can a woman operate ideally in an integral world and bring it to connection? What should she learn and what should she teach her children?

Summary

In ancient times women were connected to one another in the tribe or extended family. Today we are reconnecting once again.

We have to find the natural balance between the man’s place and the woman’s place.

In ancient times the woman’s state after giving birth was much better than it is today, she had support. Today we have to develop the feeling of mutual guarantee in society, so a woman will feel that she is not alone at home. We should have meeting places for mothers and babies, and offer them special courses and activities, etc.

A mother wants her baby to grow and to be very successful; today it means to be properly connected. We have to teach her how to make sure that the child develops as a human being and not just physically.

An integral mother works on a qualitative connection with other mothers and together they raise integral children.
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From KabTV’s “New Life #372 – An Approach to Life: The Attributes Of The Integral Woman,” 5/15/14

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Comment: June 1^st was the international day for the protection of children.

Answer: How can there be a day for the protection of children?! Children all over the world are the least protected members of society!

If we really cared about children they wouldn’t grow up to be such wicked adults. A child who doesn’t feel that he is cared for grows up to be a rigid barbaric person who wants to vent everything he did not receive in his childhood.

Question: What do you consider taking care of a child?

Answer: Taking care of a child is first of all bringing him up. He needs warmth and simple basic attention.

How can parents give something to their children today if they work all day long and only have time to pick up their kids from the different institutions they are placed in, put them to bed and take them back there the next morning? We say that a child seemingly grows up in family, but in fact he spends the whole day at the “kids’ home.”

This is the situation we have arrived to! A mother has to engage in bringing up a child and then we will have no problems.

Question: What does a mother bringing up her child mean?

Answer: It means that a mother visits the same educational institution her child does where there is a class for the children and a class for their mothers. There the mothers learn how to raise their kids, how to be connected together, and how to strengthen the family. This is how the upbringing and the education of mothers and children is done.

The fathers also should have mandatory training for one or two hours while at work about how to bring up a child and how to behave properly in the family. Then everyone at home will understand one another.

We are constantly developing so this type of education is vital! Animals don’t need this type of education but even among animals the mother is constantly by her young and doesn’t let anyone else take care of them until they grow up.

Comment: This means that we have to build increasingly stronger family connections because it is like a small cell in a large body.

Answer: It is vital that we change the world for the sake of the children so that they will grow up to be good parents. This is our role.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 6/11/16

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In the News (gazeta.ru): “The vast majority of animals raise their chicks, puppies, kittens, lambs, etc. to a certain age (height and weight of mature individuals, as a rule), and then immediately loses all family feeling. For a cat, her one-year-old kitten – is just another cat or a cat.

“Only people who have learned to consider the degree of kinship, have invented names for them, and have introduced numerous rules and prohibitions concerning not only marriage, but in general the relationship between people based on their blood relations and, therefore, between the older and younger.

“Now, the foundation of the social structure begins to waver.

“The expansion of children’s rights, giving humanity a great warning against the disgusting abuse of children, at the same time leads to overt unilateral commitments. It turns out that the child has considerably more rights and a parent – has many more responsibilities. …

“Children, at least in the ‘golden billion’ countries, have long ceased to be a guarantee of a secure old age for their parents.

“Some people naturally raise the question: Why do we need children? Why have them? If it takes you almost a quarter of a century to raise them, and then they leave? …

“So why? Who needs children?..

“Very rich and very poor children solve the problem on its own. The very rich do not need care and support in old age, they have great-grandchildren grandchildren who may provide moral support; it is also possible to buy, hire, a loving people… .

“Very poor generally live within the traditional framework of mutual obligations in the family, with greater cohesion and branched multigenerational families – almost communities.

“But the middle-class need children as a source of … love, both spiritual and physical at the same time. The first smile, first steps, first word “mama,” the child beaming adoringly, the first class, the first notebook – for it one can give everything!

“But parents pay dearly for the few years of enjoyment of parental love, unconditional love. financially, with time, and, most importantly, emotionally with the subsequent disappointment, resentment, loneliness. …

“It is possible that in the course of all the cultural fractures another quite interesting cultural shift will occur. Parents will perceive their grown children about the same as a cat does – as grown kittens.”

Answer: In the future a person’s attention will be focused on attaining the upper state where relations are not determined by earthly connections but by the connections between individual souls and the one general soul.
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New Life #371 – An Approach to Life: The Feminine In A Connected World, Part 2
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Tal Mandelbaum ben Moshe

What is there in a married woman that is not in one who is single? Why are more and more women entering the labor market today? When will we reach a stage in which women will be capable of making their peace with men?

Summary

By giving birth, a woman creates life, she is also reborn, acquiring additional emotion and intelligence.

A man can see what is ahead; a woman develops and gives birth to them.

A woman who becomes a mother understands life and the world better than a woman who doesn’t go through this.

In serious fateful decisions, it is worthwhile to rely on women with a family more than on those who are single. Certainly today in the business market there are other examples, but we are talking about a new, balanced life.

Today the world is working against mutual connection; the world of tomorrow will work in the direction of reciprocity.

Who would be a better prime minister, someone with a family or someone who is single? It would be someone with a family. Women are less corruptible than men, for a man sees money and corruption as a game; after all, he is a child….

Perfected development will only be through the right integration of feminine power and masculine power.
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From KabTV’s “New Life #371 – An Approach to Life: The Feminine In A Connected World, Part 2,” 5/15/14

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New Life #370 – An Approach to Life: Femininity In An Integral World, Part 1
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Tal Mandelbaum ben Moshe

How can society raise the importance of women correctly and what is the special role a woman has in an integral world, and how can she fulfill herself in combination with her family life?

Summary

We in are living in a time of great uncertainty. The family is breaking up and the labor market is about to undergo a great change:

Good relations between people are going to become essential and the female force has a great responsibility in this respect.

In this era of communication, even a housewife who is at home with a baby or two can be connected.

The labor market will change because of technology. People will be required to engage in creating interpersonal connections.
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From KabTV’s “New Life #370 – An Approach to Life: Femininity In An Integral World, Part 1,” 5/15/14

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In the News (nrg.co.il): Summary: According to Professor Yaira Amit, faculty member of Bible Studies at Tel Aviv University, non-religious Jews in Israel don’t know and don’t understand the Bible and its significance as the book Jewish culture is based on and its role in preserving the national Jewish identity. Most Israeli student don’t know the content and the major stories of the Bible and can hardly read the names of its heroes or quote the world famous words of the Jewish prophets. The reason for their ignorance and their indifference regarding the Bible is that it has been systematically pushed out of the national educational system. Non-religious schools have cut the hours for Bible studies to two hours a week.

Answer: Most students feel that Bible studies are not interesting, irrelevant, have nothing to do with us, and are related to religion which they regard as hateful.

I suggest learning more of the inner meaning of the Bible because it is about the structure of our world, its correction, the revelation of the upper world, and the goal and meaning of life. According to this method, the youth will not study dry history but information that is relevant to the whole world.
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Comment: Recently results were published of a 50 year study of children and parents. The research includes stories from 160,000 children. It became clear that children who were beaten by their parents had mental health problems. They became aggressors and their mental abilities were well below average. The article emphasizes that today in our world, 80% of parents in one way or another discipline their children with corporal punishment.

Answer: First and foremost it is necessary to educate the parents, since the best method is to provide an example! Any proper upbringing is done only through the example of the older relative to the younger. The wisdom of Kabbalah speaks about this.

The study examines the question of parents and children, but in fact, the most important thing is to educate the parents. And this must begin from birth.

Parents must know that they have to be an example for their child and must create such an atmosphere for him that will shape him. They need to study human nature, the psychology of boys, girls, men and women, the psychology of the family and society. It is a huge system of knowledge that many of us are lacking!

Parenting is an entire science. Who among us has received knowledge, education, and information about women? No one. We look at her as an object only for fulfilling our pleasures. And this is terrible!

For many years, even while studying the wisdom of Kabbalah, I felt how many completely natural wild, ancient, and animal impulses and attitudes were within me in toward others, which wouldn’t have existed if the environment around me had been created  by a Kabbalistic upbringing. So every parent should receive an appropriate education, and then a person will be created that doesn’t operate only according to animal instincts.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 4/28/16

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New Life #361 – Musicians And Inspiration
Dr. Michael Laitman in conversation with Oren Levi and Nitzah Mazoz

Summary

Music is part of our life and it is a powerful expression of our feelings. How can we be part of its effect on us; what characterizes musicians and what is their contribution to society?

Music is a special composition that expresses harmony and the connections between opposites. A listener with minimal experience in life can be impressed by the composition.

Composers have an inner hearing. They feel their internal world through sounds. There are different styles of music and of composers. Sometimes composers seclude themselves in order to hear themselves, but nonetheless, a composer is actually the outcome of society as a whole.

The difference between a mediocre and a brilliant composer is the extent to which he can feel the sorrow and hope of society as a whole. This has nothing to do with his spiritual level. A genius composer can also be a savage.

A composer has to try to learn the secret of life in order to reach the highest level of composition.
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From KabTV’s “New Life #361 – Musicians And Inspiration,” 7/21/14

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Question: The “Islamic State” terrorist organization has developed an application for kids for Android smart phones. This software enables children to learn the Arabic alphabet, but in a special way. The letter “Dal,” for example, corresponds to the word “Dbaba (tank),” “Saad” corresponds to “Sruch (missile),” “Meim” to “Midfa (cannon),” and so on. What can such a method lead to?

Answer: It will turn the children into soldiers. Any tyranny wants to recruit children to its army, so it is all very clear.

Of course, I feel sorry for these children. I doubt whether they will grow up to be normal members of society because their mental condition is affected by such methods.

Children need affection. They need to learn to cooperate, to sing and dance together, they need care, and they need to play. This approach should continue until the age of nine, and from the age of nine until 13, they gradually need to learn about life, but the study shouldn’t be based on hatred since it may harm a child’s psychology.

Education cannot be based on hatred because it is against the main law of nature that is aimed only at unity and love. We see how it is revealed more and more in the world today between all of the parts of creation. By wanting to separate and to divide nations and states, we go against nature, and therefore first and foremost, we suffer from this.

Question: How will this be echoed back?

Answer: It is already echoing.

There are two billion, if not more, supporters of Islam today all over the world. What happens to them? Are they happy? Do they have a normal state? Do they have a well-established system of mutual help? Everything is distorted, corrupted, and destroyed because today’s Islam is not the original Islam but rather a movement that demands sacrifices. And this is what they are prepared for.
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From KabTV’s “News with Michael Laitman” 5/11/16

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