This is so because it is a natural law for any being that anything outside one’s own body is regarded as unreal and empty.

And any movement that a person makes to love another is performed with a reflected light and some reward that will eventually return to him and serve him for his own benefit. Thus, such an act cannot be considered “love of others” because it is judged by its end. It is like rent that pays off only in the end.

However, the act of renting is not considered love of another.

But making any movement only as a result of love for others, without any spark of reflected light or hope for any kind of reward in return is completely impossible by nature (Baal HaSulam, Matan Torah [The Giving of the Torah]).

This means that one should not try to perform supposed “good deeds” toward one another. If we do this without drawing the light that returns to the source, it is still the same egoism and does not bring us any closer to correction.

First of all, we must take care to draw the light, and only then, precisely with its help and power, to act. If I act without the light, then I am guided by my egoism and only entangle myself further, and I veer off the straight path that leads toward correction.

Question: If I want to do something for the benefit of another, what is the difference whether there is light in it or not?

Answer: If you act simply from yourself, it is the result of your egoism. Even though such an action may appear from the outside to be very good and kind (you may be helping everyone and handing out gifts), you must still put in effort and invest energy. This means that you must receive compensation; otherwise, you will not be able to do anything.

By the law of conservation of energy, you must replenish what you have spent. This replenishment of energy is called the reward that you receive for doing good to others.

For example, you gave out candies and in return you received honor from them. Honor is more valuable to you than the candies, which is why you do good deeds, and you receive a nice bonus for which it is worth working. Such is the calculation made within one’s desire to enjoy.

But if you perform a good deed through the power of the Torah, the light, then you do not consider yourself at all, but only how much it contributes to the correction of the world, for this is the Creator’s desire. Therefore you do everything in order to correct the world.

Then you may be allowed to see the benefit from your actions, that is, the pleasure they have brought to the Creator. You will be permitted to see this on the condition that you do not derive any egoistic enjoyment from it, but rather place a screen over this knowledge and hold the intention for the sake of bestowal.
[173235]
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/25/15, Writings of Baal HaSulam, “Matan Torah” [The Giving of the Torah]

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