Question: Part of the connection workshops that we have done were dedicated to clarification of the difference between the sexes. First the women talked about how they see the men and how they see themselves.
Then the men expressed how they see themselves and how they see the women. This picture was compared, and it was surprising to see how different we are.
After that both the men and the women seemingly gathered all of their characteristics into a few “baskets,” and began to think about how to fulfill these qualities of the other sex: What do they want and what could they give to each other? Is it worthwhile to use an exercise like this as a game in family circles with adolescents?
Answer: This is very difficult, because here it is necessary to gradually become detached from yourself, to begin to think with the head of another person, to live in his desires, to enter into him. It follows that the abilities are mine and the desires are his, as if I live with my body but with his desires, in that we complete them and he completes mine. Here we go out to another level of cooperation, to absolute bestowal.
This is integration with each other. This is really true love: not physical, not platonic, not sexual, but precisely true integration with each other. It is doubtful that this exercise is appropriate for the family because in it the gender differences are blurred and appear differently. If we arrange this game for a circle of adolescents, then this must only be in a very advanced group.
To begin with, I would insert a discussion among the adolescents in the form of a courthouse, where a person would look at himself from the side, discussing the others not from his point of view but from the side of the other, as an arbitrator. That is how they would learn to be flexible, to discuss not only themselves but also others. This is what you need to teach them.
From KabTV’s “Conversations with Michael Laitman” 12/11/13