How can we imagine the upper state in which the Creator reveals to you that He loves all those that hate you and hates all those that love you, including yourself? It seems that it brings you no good and that there is nothing worse than that. Before you are Pharaoh, Bilam, Balak, Amalek and Hitler all in one and you know how to overcome this because this also comes to you from the Creator, although indirectly.
The more we advance towards love, the greater the obstacles we come across. You overcome them and the “angel of death” becomes the “holy angel” in your eyes.
Question: I don’t understand this state. After all, the Creator is still perceived as good and benevolent. Do I see it together with the suffering of others and my own suffering in the past?
Answer: You see all the suffering that is in reality. This is a horrible picture: monstrous suffering, not one gram of pleasure, not a day of rest, only pain and suffering for thousands of light years. The suffering is everywhere. There is total emptiness in the desire to receive, not here and there, not from time to time, but one hundred percent suffering.
This state is called the illumination of the Shechina, and above it, you reveal the good and the benevolent. Otherwise, how would it be possible to discover Him? If the Creator just brings you goodness, then you discover Him in egoistic vessels. But if you discover Him in the full depth of the black abyss that is in front of you, then He is discovered in your vessels of bestowal that are aimed at bestowal.
Furthermore, you will see that He is good only towards those who are as bad as He is, and bad towards those that are good, in contrast to Him. This is how it will seem to you.
Our work is only in rising above the vessels of reception. If you see that the Creator’s actions do not match bestowal, it appears to you intentionally as an obstacle on the way, above which you have to rise.
Question: And what do I discover after this ascent?
Answer: The desire to receive, the general vessel of Malchut of Ein Sof, in a totally empty form: darkness, despair, worry, and fear, the dreadful trials of Job, and you fill it with the Light of Hassadim and with love.
Question: That means that after having corrected myself I feel good, no matter how much darkness is revealed to me. And now I look at the past and what do I see? Have I suffered or not?
Answer: This is already the next level, which you have to determine. In Gmar Tikkun (End of Correction) you don’t see that you’ve suffered of course.
Question: And what is the suffering that I feel now?
Answer: Now you are not the same person who will attain Gmar Tikkun. Eventually you will not recognize yourself in your present state. The feelings that were left behind are not you.
Question: So what am I now?
Answer: Something virtual.
Question: So what do we need all the present states for?
Answer: You feel them in order to prepare yourself, when you do everything that is in your power. It says: “I have exerted and I found.” You are getting ready until you find, until you rise above the Machsom (barrier), until then, the real “you” doesn’t exist.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/30/12, “Introduction to the Study of the Ten Sefirot”