The help from outside from the friends, group, teacher, and books are the necessary conditions, which you need to view as external forces, belonging to your soul. Everything outside a person is his soul.
If you connect to these forces, ask their help so they pull you out of yourself, out of your ego, you see that in your entire soul, existing around you, there are no closer to you and more important parts than your friends. Only these external forces can pull a person out of his prison cell, from the shackles of his ego.
Now it is clear why the group and love of friends are so important. After all, they are the closest to you, special parts of your soul, given to you by the Creator so that with their help you break out from yourself.
The closer I become to them, the more I draw them towards myself and seek them: I do not do to others what is hateful to me and I love the friends like myself. This way I acquire the vessel of my soul (the property of bestowal), which belongs to me.
According to the perception of reality, everything that a person sees he sees within himself. His eyesight and feelings are divided into internal and external, but this is just his impression. And then, at the end of correction all is connected into one. But for the time being, this division is present in all the elements, and its correct use is a springboard into the spiritual world.
That is why Baal HaSulam writes in “Preface to The Book of Zohar” how thankful we should be to the Creator that He divided our reality into internal and external in such a way that we see the world around us, although it is all inside. It seems external to us, and although it is an illusion, it helps us psychologically treat it as strange, external forces and use it to exit our ego and reach bestowal.
I was given the illusion that all my reality is divided into myself and what is outside me, which is not mine. In this form, I can imagine the ego, in which I exist, and the intention to bestow, in which I do not exist yet, in the example of this imaginary reality divided into an internal and external part. And then I can work with it.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/16/2011, Writings of Rabash