Question: After the convention, I feel enormous separation and repulsion, which I never felt before. Can this be a result of my working incorrectly at the convention?
Answer: After the kind of unity and ascent that we felt at the convention, if a person feels separation, repulsion, and confusion, these are correct states. Resistance from our egoistic nature has to mount, and to counterbalance it, we have to fight these states.
If we maintain ourselves in that same point of unity that we attained, then by virtue of egoism which becomes attached to it, this point will start to grow. We received an example, and we must live in that same inspiration. We already contain a state called “unity,” which we attained at the convention in the clearest, most vivid form. I must preserve this state, trying to remain in it at every moment of my life.
True, now I will immediately receive all kinds of disturbances, but they are all intended for me to strengthen myself more in the same point that I attained at the convention. Then this point will grow based on all of these disturbances. They will enter it and will support it with the help of my efforts. And then this point will expand. That is how I grow this point to the size of the first spiritual level. I don’t have any other opportunity to grow in spirituality, but only by virtue of the disturbances, “help against me.”
From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/12/11, Writings of Rabash