There is an easy solution: Start disseminating. While engaged in dissemination, you forget about yourself. Even people who are not connected with each other, begin to establish contact. The more knowledge about unity you generate in the world, the further you advance. Forget about everything that happens to you personally, except for basic needs. Turn everything else outward—this will prevent friction and discord between you.
This is just as spouses devote themselves to the problem of their sick child, forgetting about themselves. Their attention shifts outward, and that is where they concentrate all their efforts. This common problem unites them. Thus, begin to take care of your “sick child,” the world.
This will cool the passion between you. It is pointless to fix your relationship directly. Switch outward fully, really immerse yourselves in the practical work, and then you will suddenly see how to organize things inside. Taking care of the group‘s internal matters will work only if it is necessary for the work with the outside world. Only then you organize everyone and everything. Let only the need for external dissemination define who we are and what we do. Then, we really will work to bestow.
Take the example of Bina. Its upper half is aimed at bestowal to the Creator; its lower half is aimed at bestowal to the world, and it itself is the middle third of Tifferet, merely the decision to divide itself into two parts. Thus, this is how everyone and each group should perceive themselves.
From the 7th lesson at the Toronto Convention 9/18/11