True egoism develops within us when we wish to unite. It begins after the “usual” egoism. We naturally hate others, are eager to take advantage of them, and want to rise above them. This doesn’t exist on the animate level since it characterizes only the speaking level: We need to feel superior to others at least in some way.
But when a person still wants to become one with the others above his egoism, he discovers resentment of an unprecedented magnitude. It turns out that a force that opposes unification is instilled in his nature, and hence, even while willing to unite, a person cannot accomplish it. His desire to receive cares and thinks about itself, while hating and rejecting another.
Despite all my effort to bond with the others, I detect this force, that very egoism which we define as purposeful. It is not merely hurting the others, but the property which resists oneness. Only this kind of egoism leads me to transformation. I feel that it is exactly what I need to reform. It is a kind of supplement to the final, fourth stage of the development of desire.
From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/18/2011 on The Principles of Global Education