A Person Riding A Donkey
Question: I understand what you say in my mind, but in my heart I feel that I am completely not ready to cancel myself in order to unite with others. How can I desire this?
Answer: We will never desire to advance to higher spiritual states. And it’s good that we realize this ourselves! A person understands that he does not desire true spirituality on any condition, as opposed to some kind of fairy-tale world he invented where he will fly with angels and do anything he wants, where he will receive total power and see all the worlds from one end to the other.
If we begin to understand the meaning of real spiritual reality, which is above any egoistic benefit, we can only imagine, then obviously we do not want it. We have to understand that all the changes in us are made only by the upper Light that reforms. It has to elevate us and give us new qualities. Only by way of realizing these qualities, by understanding, feeling, and controlling them, will we be able to look at the world through them. That is how I will gradually become a new person.
I will begin to feel that above the animate body with which I identify myself today, a certain equivalence with the Upper One becomes built inside me —a new form or Kli called “the human” in me, meaning “one who is similar to the Creator.” ("Adam," "man," comes from the word "Domeh," "similar"). This person will be riding on top of my “donkey” ("donkey," "Hamor," comes from the word "Homer," "matter"), on top of my previous desires. Thus, a person who has straddled a donkey understands and feels the Creator. But the donkey doesn’t!
This formation of the human in us takes place by virtue of the Light that reforms. It’s not that we desire this on our own, of course not! Our donkey (meaning we today) does not want the human to come! After all, the human will begin to rule over the donkey.
Meanwhile, the donkey wants to receive what it wants. That is why, naturally, today we do not desire the true spiritual state. The more we advance, the more we gradually begin to understand that the spiritual world is completely not what we expected and we no longer want it.
Further advancement is possible only by virtue of the influence of the group, which will imbue us with the importance of spiritual attainment. Only to this degree will we be able to advance, but we will not find the forces to do this in ourselves.
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/16/11, Writings of Rabash
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