When we choose the quality of bestowal, “the ugly beauty” (as it appears to our egoism, a state called Tshuva Mi Iria), then after living with her for a while we start to experience the state of love (the 15th of Av), reception for the sake of bestowal (Tshuva Mi Ahava). We have just completed the Mega Congress where by virtue of our efforts we revealed the “bride,” who is beautiful for attaining the Creator yet ugly to our egoism.
However, just as it often happens in life, now that the “wedding” is over we are revealing problems since egoism is always growing and changing. It is becoming apparent that you married an ugly and quarrelsome woman who is not satisfied with anything you give her. However, in reality she is demanding bestowal; but since you are being influenced by egoism, you are losing inspiration and desire to fulfill your egoism.
You will have to work by “faith above reason” (in bestowal against egoism) in order to understand that in reality it is precisely the selfless desire to bestow that is beautiful, wealthy, and dignified. It possesses all the good qualities, only you don’t see that!
Let’s hope that we will go through this new phase of egoism’s growth and attain correction. Then, instead of seeing the “poor and ugly” Malchut, we will see all of her beauty, which will be revealed in the quality of bestowal. This state is called “the day of love” (the 15th of Av).
From the 1st part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 7/26/10, “15th of Av”
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