With women everything is assessed by the degree to which they desire to be together and support or surround the male part. Women have to put pressure on the men. This is their character. They must only use it truly correctly, without being embarrassed. Women depend on the men’s group and it depends on them. The men’s group will not move forward without women.

The female inclination is primary while the male inclination is secondary. That is how all of nature is built. If it weren’t for women, men would spend their whole lives playing soccer. Yet the female inclination forces them to create a family, to work, to come home, and arrange something. All of this is the female desire, not the male one. A man does not have any of this. He is like a child his whole life.

That is why women have to get organized the right away and put pressure and influence on the men. And the men have to understand this. We are adults and we have to use our nature, both the female and the male, in order to attain the goal. The goal is attained mutually. It is like the birth of a new baby that belongs to both.

Therefore, you should look at this seriously and mutually. It isn’t a coincidence that we were created precisely this way. We look at everything as an accidental occurrence, but in reality we must collect everything inside of us to the maximum and combine it the right way. Then we will acquire a desire in which the Creator will be revealed. Nothing can be done here without the female inclination.

The world consists of 60% women and they are the most stable half in the world. Similarly, the group is absolutely unstable without the female part. A strong women’s group is the guarantee for a stable men’s part. It is more stable. By acting correctly, it softens and cushions all the problems, all of the swaying of our common ship.

Women have to understand this and clearly carry out their function. Men also have to understand this and give women the appropriate opportunities, as well as value them. Without this, they won’t achieve anything. The male part will immediately “go awry” without the female part. The presence of women suppresses all of the glitches.

Even Abraham was told, “Listen to what Sarah will tell you.” The women’s basis in development is initially the most important. The entire desire that we have to correct is the female desire, which is expressed through a woman. Therefore, you should organize yourselves the right way. Wherever there is a strong female part, you are guaranteed great success.
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From the lesson in Moscow on 1/16/11, Writings of Rabash

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Question: If the realization of evil occurs due to the lack of unity, then how does a woman experience this realization if she doesn’t do any practical work in uniting? How exactly should she feel unity?

Answer: This is just like within a family. How can you explain the entire family life in detail and what the relationship between the husband and wife means?

A man and a woman are two images that compose all of humanity, and together they have to create the image of a single soul. This is why the group must consist of male and female parts which have to unite with each other in their work and mutual support.

There should never be any insistence if a husband or a wife does not wish to partake in this. There is no coercion is spirituality, therefore, there shouldn’t be any pressure. But in the group the mutual help from both sides should resemble simple family dynamics.

Without women it’s impossible to advance because they are the carriers of natural desire and, therefore, are closer to nature. Without men it’s also impossible to advance since they’re the conductors of this upper energy that’s passed on to the female part. It means that we depend upon each other in our spiritual development just as we do in our corporeal life.

Our connection in the group should be like a connection in the correct family unit, where we complete each other. We already see families in all parts of the world where the wife, the kids, and the husband are all taking part in this process. We’re organizing virtual schools.

I would like for the women to be a lot more active. I don’t understand why the women’s part of the groups suddenly quiets down, becomes less active, and exists along with the men but slightly beneath them. I don’t understand this.

I have many women helping me with translations and with processing the materials. I have more faith in them then I do in men because women are more devoted to their work and they won’t let you down. For this reason the women’s group should be “heard” more.
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From Lesson 3 in Moscow 1/16/2011

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Question: How can a working woman with children combine preparation for the convention with daily domestic chores?

Answer: I advise her to listen to our programs while doing domestic chores; she can do so by turning on our television channel or Internet site. For a woman, it is easier to accomplish: she can switch on the TV and continue working around the house. This alone puts a person under the influence of the right environment.

In addition, if it is possible, open my blog and read it daily; as much as the time allows, enter the Sviva Tova (Good Environment—the worldwide Internet connection) site and answer the questions. Usually, a woman’s time is more limited than a man’s; but if she finds the time for all of this, then she should try listening to Kabbalistic music.

If a person is eager but can’t find time to do more, then such conditions are arranged for him or her from Above, and it is enough for preparation. And the rest we will do together at the convention.
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From the Introductory Lecture Series Kabbalah for the Nation 10/12/10, “Preparation for the Convention”

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Question: Has there ever been a couple, a husband and wife, in the history of Kabbalah who revealed the Creator specifically in their connection with one another? And have they left any sources behind?

Answer: Couples like this have existed throughout history: Adam and Eve, Abraham and Sarah, Isaac, Jacob, and Esau with their wives, and so on. The female part is always in the picture because without it, there is no contact, no adhesion (Zivug de Hakaa), no connection between the Creator and the creature.

The only purpose of the male part within us is to correct the female part within us. For this reason, from the point of correcting creation, it is the female part that needs correction. The object of correction is woman. The force of correction is man. The Light of correction comes through the man with the purpose of correcting the female part. When the female part is corrected, it births the next state from the male part.
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From Lesson 1 in Moscow 1/14/2011, “Introduction of the Book of Zohar”

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Question: Is it true that in each generation, there is only one authentic Kabbalist?

Answer: Everyone is necessary since each person works in their own area. Humanity is diverse, and each of its parts requires a special language and approach until people have advanced and become able to hear the truth. Therefore, it’s not worth thinking about who is a Kabbalist. We should strive to learn the truth and come closer to it, but if today or tomorrow a truly great one shows up, we will follow him.

As to a specific generation, it is hardly possible for more than one real Kabbalist to emerge. After all, there is only one head. And all others, who are either near or below him, may be in the tens, hundreds, or thousands according to the structure of the pyramid. If not in this generation, then in the next one, I hope that we will see something resembling the Sanhedrin (Assembly of Sages): a great number of Kabbalists who are at a high level of attainment and together guide humanity on the path to the Creator.

Question: Is there a connection between the “36 righteous ones” and Kabbalists?

Answer: There is not. The “36 righteous ones” is a concept. It means that in this world, there are special souls through which abundance comes into this world so as to sustain the existence of this corporeal reality. It is a unique system, not individual people.

Question: Can a woman be a Kabbalist?

Answer: Definitely so. There were women who attained spirituality: our foremothers, followed by prophetesses, and then the people who before the fall of the Second Temple perceived the upper world.

Men and women are not different in this. Today, I know many of our female students who have been working selflessly for many years and advancing thereby. Their perception and desire are greater than those of most of our men. I have no doubts that they can reach a level not lower than that of the men.

Besides, since all of us are moving toward the revelation of the Creator, most likely it will result in both men’s and women’s revelation of Him. Is a woman not part of the creation? It’s just that she has a somewhat different spiritual job than a man does, but “different” doesn’t mean “not spiritual.”

Question: How do I explain to a child what a Kabbalist is?

Answer: A Kabbalist is a person who reveals the Creator according to the law of equivalence of form. He transformed himself in such way that he became somewhat similar to the Creator. Hence, he has a particle from Above which is called a soul, the Creator’s part. In this part, he experiences the spiritual world, upper dimension, eternal life, and identifies himself with it.

So, when the life of his corporeal body expires, he doesn’t feel a loss. He continues to live and feel spiritual existence as he does right now. Such a person is regarded as a Kabbalist because he received a spiritual life.
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From Kabbalah for Beginners “Who is a Kabbalist?” 12/13/2010

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Question: How can we connect the opposites?

Answer: Opposite things can only be connected through resistance which opposes both of them. It is not important what the resistance consists of; it exists and it is the only thing that can connect the two opposite phenomena.

For example, two people, a husband and wife, do not get along with each other. They turn to a specialist, a psychologist, and he connects them. How? He does not agree with either of them; he is in the middle.

Such a judge must be within us: I do not connect two opposite things without a third one because the direct connection between them is impossible. And if I try to do this, then I get a short circuit, causing destruction.

This is also related to the connection between husband and wife. Due to the growth of the egoistic desire, they feel themselves to be opposite to one another, and between two opposites there has to be a higher connector.

Zeir Anpin and Malchut (ZON) of the world of Atzilut connect only under the condition that they ascend into the Partzuf Aba ve Ima. Before this, there is no connection between them since it only forms due to the ascent, the attainment of the Creator.

In the future, family will only exist due to the higher spiritual goal, and for the sake of attaining it, spouses will support each other.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/10/10, Talmud Eser Serifot

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Question: An absolute majority of psychologists and psychiatrists state that sexual orientation is not something a person chooses, nor can it be adjusted. All attempts to alter sexual orientation have been unsuccessful.

Does a gay person have to re-define his or her sexual inclination in accordance with Kabbalah’s requirements? Does he have a choice?

Answer: Kabbalah doesn’t ask a person to make any changes on the material level. If the intention of a person is “to love his neighbor,” that is, to correct his egoism, then all his worldly actions will be right.
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Question: What is true love and is it really possible?

Answer: By design, we are so unique and complex that we cannot truly love a spouse, our parents and children, people around us, humanity, or the Creator unless it is all tied into a single whole!

We are developing in such fashion that our nature won’t let us love only one particular individual. A person thinks that he loves his children, wife, and maybe some other people, but in the end, he isn’t succeeding with any of them. He sees that something constantly breaks, crushes, and he runs into walls, with all of his desire to love. But why is it so?

The wisdom of Kabbalah reveals this secret to us by saying that love can be only absolutely perfect and general. If you don’t love all, you won’t be allowed to feel love for any individual. This means that you must love everything there is: the Creator, humanity, the world, those who are close and dear, and those who are distant, all as one whole. This is the only way to achieve love. Otherwise, it is impossible. I am sorry I have to tell you this, but it’s true.

Besides, we think that love is something very exalted, something heavenly. In truth, love is a beast; it is something very simple: the act of unification of “flesh with flesh.” But if we wish to raise this beast that lives among us and is called “love,” then we have to feed it with something called “mutual concessions.”

I yield to you, thereby feeding our love, and it gets “thicker.” Then you yield to me, and our love grows. Since we are all egoists, concessions are the only action that can help us cultivate love.

We have to learn to concede! There are only two principles to love: the first one is to build love on concessions, and the second is that love can be only all-inclusive, and then each individual love will also come true.
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From Talk with Arkadi Duchin 12/22/10

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Question: Is it necessary for every one of us to concede in order to achieve peace in the world?

Answer: The question is: What are we willing to sacrifice? We must sacrifice our egoism, hate, and resentment. Concession is like overcoming an obstacle. Only in this case, I overcome my inner qualities, my nature, and yield to my connection with someone else.

Rabash repeatedly said that love is not an animate sensation that arises in us naturally, under the pressure of hormones. Spiritual love is something that we create ourselves since it is doesn’t exist a priori. It is built on the basis of concessions.

A person overcomes himself, receives the attributes of the Creator, and while doing so, he starts realizing who he is going to connect with. This is how love for someone is born within him.

In the degree that a person loves the Creator, he loves the friend since only with the friend’s help can he realize his love for the Creator. It is similar to how love is built on mutual compromise in the family. One shouldn’t get married because he or she “fell in love,” which is not love but deception that will not last.

Yet if two people understand that they should form a union for the sake of an exalted goal, they will concede to each other. This will be part of their spiritual work since they will be tied by the goal, and then they will build love between them.

This will be authentic love that will lead them to love for the Creator. After all, it is the Creator who will obligate them to yield to each other and establish mutual connection of love.
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From the 4th part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 12/20/10, “Peace in the World”

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Question: At the recent Convention, there was a strong presence of the female part of the Kli. They were asking numerous questions, and what I heard and felt in them was that the male half doesn’t exert enough effort, and the women wish to receive the Light that Reforms themselves.

I am speaking about all the women: those who are married and whose husbands study Kabbalah, those who are not married yet, or those whose husbands are not studying Kabbalah. True, the Light comes from the Creator, not a male or female. And it doesn’t matter who you are, male or female, except the realization.

Won’t it be so that many women (and men since everyone has a female part, which is the only one I can work with) use it as a guide to action? It would divide us, would it not? Why then do we need to be married, men and women? Or are your answers only for women whose husbands are not studying Kabbalah yet?

Answer: A person gets married not to receive the Light from his wife, but in order to place himself in the setting most beneficial for spiritual advancement. This is what Kabbalists advise, and a man who ignores it deprives himself of an opportunity to advance. He thinks that he can logically justify or debunk what a higher spiritual degree is telling him.

A Kabbalists’ recommendation is “Segula,” a magic potion that needs to be taken. Men are obligated to marry; women are not. And spiritual work remains spiritual work for both. There is a World Kli, its male and female parts, each of which must be working for the sake of our unification and aspiration to the Creator.
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