It is said in the Bible that a woman was created from a man’s rib. The original Hebrew word for “rib” means both rib and shadow.

That is, a woman is created as a reflection of a man, and, for this reason, she must help him and give approval and advice accordingly. As it also is written, “Listen to the woman.”

A woman must be a mother, a housewife, a woman in charge. She must feel that the household is her domain, and the husband is in charge of everything that’s outside the household.

A man should obey his wife fully in matters pertaining to their common household, and she should obey him when it comes to resolving all other matters. This is the way they should support one another so that their partnership would correspond to the Biblical verse that says that she exists as the husband’s shadow.

If there is no shadow, then there is no sun. It’s an allegory that can be developed interestingly from a psychological standpoint. When a man and a woman coexist this way, the sun shines upon them and they develop.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/5/12

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If I study in the integral education group, I shouldn’t be interested in the gender, personality, or the marital situation of the people in the group. What interests me is only their effort to transcend themselves, the extent that we can ascend together.

It’s as if their souls hold hands, souls without bodies, sex, or any family burdens. It’s as if from the 12 people who learn in the group a spirit exits, and all 12 spirits rise together to the next level. That’s the way that they basically want to see themselves.

From the discussions in the focus groups, I see that women understand this more. And men are right in a sense that a quick integration into each other may lead to problems. When people come closer spiritually, it’s good. But afterwards, when they return to the usual corporeal level, this closeness can bring all kinds of unwanted connections. No other connections in the group, except for spiritual connections, are desirable.

Under no circumstances do I want to forbid anything. I simply say to them that for the attainment of equality, the connection, the general mutual spiritual combination, it’s absolutely forbidden for us to cast even a small anchor within our corporeal relations. We need to completely separate from them.

We need to understand that the human who now begins to grow from within us is a Human Being. And next to him our body exists like a puppy or a cat that you must give what it needs. When you give your “animal’’ what it really needs, not more or less, that’s the best and healthiest thing for it. Give it the needed portion and don’t think about it any more. And as far as everything else is concerned, raise it and connect it above—the human within you.

Thus, it’s actually desirable to not know anything about others and to always aspire upwards. We will become familiar with each other to the extent that we clarify our problems in the group, meaning the problems that arise at home, in the family, or with the children. We will begin to see it as the approach for ascending upwards. I open up about it specifically so that the group will help me solve the problem at the corporeal level and rise above it higher to the next, human level. In this case, it’s necessary.

Except for that, in the meantime we need a lot of empirical data that we will use to make conclusions, and life will teach us.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/1/12

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Question: There was a mythological time when human communities were organized close to nature, which means that they were divided into communities of men and communities of women and lived together in harmony. According to literature, there was a joyful atmosphere and many jokes in the women’s community when the women gathered and laughed about things that had to do with the men. Can we use this concept in integral education?

Answer: We can use everything, whatever you want. We shouldn’t suppress any movement in any way. The only thing we should deal with is to raise our connection, the image of the upper One, to a collective movement, to a common feeling, to a general collective attribute of bestowal, to love.

All the rest will be sorted out by itself, and whatever is unnecessary will be deleted, and what is necessary will be intensified and rise. So, there is no need to pay attention to anything except for our spiritual ascent when our collective spirit, the connection, is constantly at the center of our attention.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: According to statistics, 90% of women convey all their secrets to their female friends, and 90% of men convey all their secrets to their wives. Women have the need to share their innermost feelings with a close friend. Is this right? Or does this situation need to be changed?

Answer: We don’t work with these kinds of problems or consider it necessary to involve ourselves in these areas of human communication and psychology because they don’t directly and strictly relate to the integration of society. People communicate with others in whatever way is comfortable for them. At the same time we never impose anything on them because communication on a natural, animal level doesn’t interest us.

What interests us is how much we are able to raise a person above himself towards the integration with others. We need to cultivate the feeling that they begin to experience in a group, the integral feeling that happens mainly between men, and this is what we need to pay attention to. All other questions concerning who shares with whom and what they share in their everyday lives doesn’t interest us.

Naturally men consult with their wives. As a rule a husband has an inner need to share with his wife and receive her approval. He has this need his entire life starting with his mother.

Women don’t have this state. When she is young she has a mother, and later only a female friend who is able to understand or somehow support her; she needs a shoulder to cry on because her husband doesn’t fully understand her.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: What is best to discuss in a group of integral education and what’s best not to discuss?

Answer: Figuratively speaking, we should talk only about love and friendship. We don’t examine our states because they all exist on the animal level.

First we must rise to the “Human” level, create a generalized image of it, our common quality of bestowal and love, our attitude toward one another. We can only hold discussions on the level of this network of correct interrelations between us, and only about things that strengthen our collective state.

Why so? Because, by becoming stronger within this state we begin to generate a certain force that illuminates our current animal state and it begins to change. Only from a higher state can we change our lower state. All of our conflicts will either gradually disappear or they will escalate before disappearing and on the backdrop of this we are developing our connection.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: Let us say that there are forty to fifty people in a group of integral learning. Where should the women be during the studies?

Answer: Figuratively speaking, women need to take men by the hand, bring them to their place, and sit them down. At the same time, they also can participate in this group, but purely externally. Men should not feel or see them.

Women must not be in the way of the men. It is best for them to observe the men though a video camera from another room.

Men sit in a circle. They can hug, be close to one another, and perceive their unity, their proximity, in different ways through whatever words they wish to use. They can cry and admire.

Women, practically, cannot have this kind of state between them, of course, except for certain eccentric individuals who also exist. This is why they need to sit in a separate auditorium, not in a circle, but in rows, in whatever way they wish to arrange their chairs or just randomly scattered around, and have a screen where they can see the men’s group.

This is exactly how they learn. They listen to the same article, feel and understand what the men are doing between them, and they do their inner preparation. Basically, they do not need more than this.

They understand the importance of the objective the men have undertaken and which only they can realize. At the same time, the women change and shape themselves, and this is absolutely enough. In other words, the men carry the importance and the realization of the goals with the absolute support of the women in the background.

Question: In other words, do women not need to take part in the discussion of what they see?

Answer: No, men absolutely do not need it! Women only need to express their support, admiration, and participation. Maybe, they can do some things to help.

Men must feel that they are supported constantly and passionately, that women seriously participate and, at the same time, are very demanding and attentive, like a mother. They demand a result from what is happening. As soon as the men attain any result, women need to show them their admiration and their approval without which they cannot advance.

Question: When women gather in a separate place, can they somehow communicate, talk, and discuss things?

Answer: Of course. First of all, they need to help themselves. Bring cakes, fruit, and sweets. They need to create a nice environment for everyone, but never impose mutual internal work on one another! It must be voluntary.

Naturally, they will feel close in spirit, a sort of a women’s union, but not more than that. Everything is done only around the men.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: As a psychologist, I had an opportunity to communicate with a number of women who have participated in the integral experiment in a direct or an indirect manner. Some of them complained that they spend the majority of their time alone: The husband is busy all day; the children are small and she needs to be fully involved in what they are doing; she has no time to communicate with her girlfriends. They do not understand how to organize their lives. What should they do?

Answer: I think that women will not feel alienated from others if we give them the right kind of preparation, teach them to use a computer, and constantly broadcast, over television or computer, programs of virtual communication, combining education and upbringing, all the news of the society that is being newly created. In addition, women need to connect through Skype or other programs that allow them to interact, see each other, and communicate. They need to have a mutual virtual table.

We understand that women are busy at work and at home, and even when a woman does not work in any society, she has much more work at home than men. The woman is the home. No matter how much we separate from our original nature, this is still her purpose. Maybe these things are unpleasant to hear, but this is part of the foundation of nature, so we need to consider it.

If among all the current obligations of a woman, we will give her an opportunity to participate in the common movement, she will feel like she is a part of a big society, a big movement, and this will be enough. She will maintain it. She will justify her husband’s activities. This is enough for her to properly participate in the community.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: During the work in the integral group, we found a text that was arranged in a special way. It described what a group is and what “we” is, all the levels, etc. It is amazing that around this text there began a creation of some kind of field, to be specific, some kind of shared feeling. What is your opinion of the work with the text?

Answer: I think that this is the most important thing! When a group assembles, a text should always be presented to it.

These texts can be repeated. With time, the group goes through all kinds of states, and each time even the previous text will be grasped differently, in a new way. Since, after all, we all change, and thus the entire group is different each time, and it will discover within its combination, all kinds of aspects of unity, connection, integration, etc.

This is creative work. The people in the group will feel the direction they were brought to and attracted to, yesterday and today. According to the situation of each one of them, they will feel a general, shared desire, an over-all attribute of mutual attraction, bestowal and love, an ascending of the ego which usually separates people, which positions each one in a certain relation to others. And here they must rise above this state in spite of their ego.

Question: During one and a half hours we were able to go through only two paragraphs of the article, because it’s actually possible to hold a one-hour discussion on each word.

Answer: That’s really so. Suddenly one word invites a full variety of sensations! This happens since it is specifically this shared field, which creates an unusual abundance of variation.

Question: What do you think? Is it worthwhile in the beginning to read the entire article and then to divide it into paragraphs and discuss them?

Answer: No. There is no need to load people with this information, since it is sensory, mental, and it will be difficult for people to deal with this bulk.

Whereas, if they listen to one or two sentences in a relaxed manner, then suddenly they begin to see in the text: ‘’How do we implement it? What is it for? Why? For what reason?’’ And even if some phrases that you haven’t read yet, explain previous ones, it’s not important if you get stuck in them, since in this way you will understand the importance more, by getting confused in presenting them.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/4/12

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Question: In the process of integral education, can we organize some joint activities for men and women such as on the holidays, for example?

Answer: I think that a society that aspires toward integration will discover a greater separation between the sexes. We see that nature doesn’t agree with any intermingling.

In nature, there exists a precise subordination, a hierarchy, a separation in accordance with functions and the way that men and women realize themselves. It’s precisely the correct alignment of these two opposites that will create and give birth to a new, harmonious society.
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From a Talk on Integral Education 3/4/12

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Question: What does “Adam” mean? Is it a thought or a visual image?

Answer: Adam stands for two parts, desires and thoughts, since we consist of both heart and mind. It’s important to understand that desires are primary to thoughts and that they direct our mind. Thoughts develop in us in accordance with the quality of our desires.

There is a proverb, “The more one is beaten, the smarter one gets.” This is because our willingness to rid ourselves of affliction promotes our growth. We become more ingenious and smart when we seek how to escape suffering and be fulfilled with something we really want. Therefore, no matter how great or respected our mind is, it still is simply an attendant that serves our desires.

Having agreed to that, we should instigate higher desires within us. Then, our mind will rise to reach them.

Let’s say, in a group of ten, we rise to a degree at which all of us have the same desires that transcend our bodily material wishes. We should leave all sensible desires, as well as earthly matters, at home.

As soon as the group enters a place—a studio, classroom, or so forth, that could be called a lab—that’s it! The door is shut. The external world ceases to exist. Only those who are in the room are important.

It’s as if we were on board a spaceship that is flying to an unknown place for an indefinite time. We lose the sense of time; and earthly problems do not trouble us any longer. Nothing matters! Our goal is to ascertain a structure called Adam (man).

What kind of desire shall we have? It should only be to merge with each other, to become one whole.

Accordingly, we begin realizing that the structure we are trying to define is similar to nature, which, nowadays, manifests itself as an integral, unified, and complete organism. If we understand this fact, we’ll feel much better and more at ease.

We will comprehend nature better and will be able to read it. Then, if we regard nature from the integral point of view that we should form between us, we’ll instinctively perceive and follow its laws. We will realize that it’s essential to re-organize our lives, even at the regular, material, and routine level.

Let’s induce such desires within us. Let’s aspire to rise above ourselves, regardless of our earthly goals and hopes. We must uplift and enhance our integral “something” and bring it beyond all material issues. It’s our duty to completely support each other in this task.
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From a Talk on Integral Upbringing 3/2/12

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