Talks about the Steps of the Ladder, Part 238

How Should We Relate to the Various States?

First, we accept the state that comes, observe it, and want to examine it within ourselves, without judging whether it has done us good or bad. We examine it from within the recognition that everything the Creator does, He does for good. We give it a place from the knowledge that it has come to correct us, even if it is so difficult that “a sharp sword rests upon my neck.” We must not despair or drown in self-pity. Everything is a correction.

Naturally, it is not always easy to accept states in such a way. But after we have related to them in this manner once, there will be moments when we feel incapable, filled with resistance and a desire for destruction, and then, upon second thought, we will begin to relate to the state correctly. The resistance will disappear the moment we remember that the state is intended to correct us, and from there we must move on to the third state, “There is none else besides Him.” From within that state, through the sorrow and pain, we will begin to discover “There is none else besides Him,” and will immediately arrive at sweetness, i.e., at the sweetening of the judgments.

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Preparation to the Lesson

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1st part of the Lesson — Lesson on the Topic “Baal HaSulam Memorial” (9.20.2018)

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2nd part of the Lesson — Writings of Baal HaSulam, “Study of the Ten Sefirot,” Vol. 1, Part 2, Chapter 2, Item 6

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Question: How can we achieve such harmony in human society? In other words, can we simply live as though there were no other people? Can we begin living this way?

Answer: This is precisely what Kabbalah proposes. It is when the others do not interfere with you but, on the contrary, help you, and when you feel that being among them gives you a great deal of space!

You are in an enormous crowd, with a million people around you, yet you feel as though you are completely free. No one is pressing against you; there are no disturbing shouts, no intrusive influences, nothing. Everything is calm and good, as though you were in an open field.

Question: Is this what you call “a world without man, yet with man”?

Answer: Yes. We can create such a world, despite the fact that there are so many of us.

The main thing is not to interfere with nature. That is what all of this is about. Do not interfere; do not intrude upon nature. Study it and try to achieve integrality with it. When you achieve such unity with nature, you will see how, in reality, everything is simple and benevolent.
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From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 9/2/26

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Question: Can aggression be directed toward peaceful ends? Everyone understands how it works for non-peaceful ends,  but toward peaceful purposes?

Answer: Peaceful purposes mean against oneself.

Question: So right now, all aggression is directed from within oneself outward? And you say, “This vector needs to be turned toward oneself”?

Answer: Little by little, gradually, turn it somehow toward oneself.

Question: So, it turns out that aggression exists for this very purpose, so that I can gradually turn it toward myself?

Answer: Yes.

Question: So, it turns out that I am attacking this “I” of mine that asserts itself?

Answer: Your “I” is hatred toward others, the desire to rule over others. And if you transform it into the opposite, understanding that it is impossible to remain in such a quality, then you instead acquire the quality of bestowal and love, the spiritual quality.

Question: So aggression toward oneself is good? The bad thing—aggression toward others—turns into aggression toward oneself, and this is good? And this is what it exists for?

Answer: Yes. And then you truly begin to relate to yourself as an enemy.

Question: And this is good?

Answer: And this is good, of course.

Comment: Humanity needs to make such an effort.

My Response: It will make the effort; it has nowhere to go. There will be such suffering that it will wish for this.

Question: There are enemies of humanity all around. Everyone feels that there are only enemies around. And you say, “The enemies are inside you.” This formula is clear to me. But can it actually enter a person’s mind and heart?

Answer: And why couldn’t others?

Question: No, can it enter? Can a person suddenly turn the weapon around that has been aimed and built?

Answer: But you understand, don’t you?

Comment: Yes, I understand.

My Response: Then others will understand too.
[360047]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 8/3/26

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Question: What does “the Torah is barren” mean?

Answer: If the Creator created the Torah as a spice for the desire to receive, but it is not corrected with the help of the Torah, then it produces no results.

Such a state is called “the barrenness of the Torah.” All the results produced by the Torah are first of all correction and afterward fulfillment.

This is precisely what The Book of Zohar states: those who do not wish to engage in the wisdom of Kabbalah make the Torah barren. They simply do not use the Torah as a force that corrects the desire to receive.

The Torah is both fulfillments and holy names that are revealed in the intention for the sake of bestowal. But we are not speaking about that yet, since these are already more advanced degrees. Initially, when you first encounter the true Torah, it acts precisely as a force of correction.

If you do not accept it in this form, then all your engagement around it is not called Torah.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/30/26, Rabash, “What Is ‘He Who Is Without Sons,’ in the Work?”

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Talks about the Steps of the Ladder, Part 237

Why Do New Discernments Give Us a Familiar Feeling?

New discernments are seemingly new, but when we examine the way they are expressed, we see that the words are the same familiar words. In the wisdom of Kabbalah, we learn that all of reality consists of only the original ten Sefirot. There is nothing beyond that. The worlds and the souls are within them. Everything exists in the ten Sefirot. The difference lies in the way these new discernments cause us to feel those ten Sefirot, which is different and deeper. The depth of their perception consists of 125 degrees.

We are still before degree zero of attainment. Also, even before we begin to attain the ten Sefirot, before the barrier, there are steps and discernments. However, in principle, the picture is the same, as we learn in Kabbalah, that all the worlds are built according to the same pattern: five Partzufim and ten Sefirot. That is, everything is the same, and we repeat the same thing. A three- or four-year-old child learning to read the Torah and a Kabbalist such as Rabbi Shimon read the same Torah, but each understands different layers of it.

What does a child reading the Torah say to his or her mother? “Mom, look, Abraham wanted to kill Isaac.” That is how he understood the Torah. A Kabbalist, however, knows the correction that the Torah describes in the case of Abraham and Isaac, a correction entirely above this world, and attains it, sees it through spiritual forces, through an eternal vision. Yet the expression is in the same letters and words.

When we begin to study, we discover that we see new things in the study material each time. Suppose students are sitting in a lesson and reading an article with their Kabbalist teacher. Afterward, one of the students asks the teacher about the meaning of the text. How does the Kabbalist know something beyond what they know? It is because the Kabbalist sees additional depths in the article that are hidden from the students’ eyes. The Kabbalist cannot convey to the student what the Kabbalist feels, but explains what he sees in different words.

For the students, the article is revealed only to a certain depth. For the Kabbalist, it reveals deeper layers, and there are those to whom nothing will be revealed. They will read the article and there will be no response in their hearts because they still have no spiritual vessel. Among the students, such a vessel is already beginning to form. So what is the difference between the student and the Kabbalist? The difference is that when the Kabbalist explains something to the student, he gives him a little illumination from the depth in which he himself resides, bringing it up to the level where the student is. In other words, the Kabbalist adds additional light of his own to the surrounding light that the student awakens during the study.

A group can also add light. In a group, each person understands according to a certain depth, greater than that of a person who does not study the wisdom of Kabbalah. Therefore, when they study together with the intention of sharing everything with each other, all of their surrounding lights unite and act upon everyone. From this, we can understand what a powerful amplifier of spiritual force the group is.

It does not matter that there are differences in knowledge among the people in the group, nor does it matter if there is a Kabbalist among them and everyone else knows less than the Kabbalist. The differences stem from the fact that each person has a unique character and a unique root of the soul. Yet even the Kabbalist benefits from this integration and receives an addition from it. There are things that the Kabbalist will be unable to understand without certain friends in the group, each of whom brings something uniquely their own.

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Question: What kind of marital union can keep a family from falling apart? What are the roles of the woman and the man in such a union?

Answer: There must be proper upbringing. No matter what happens, throughout your life, thousands of different situations and adventures may occur with each of you, but you know that you have a family, and it is your obligation to support them and stand by them. As long as you live, you must take care of them. That is first and foremost. As for feelings, well… What feelings? You cannot build anything on feelings alone.

Comment: You have said more than once that a man looks for his mother in a woman.

My Response: That is true. A man looks for something of his mother in a woman. And if he finds it in her, that ensures his attachment to her.

Question: So, if a woman understands that he is looking for his mother, does that make the union work?

Answer: Yes. That is why it is said in the Torah that our forefathers would bring their brides into, say, their mother’s tent. And the brides would live there. And after the bride had lived with her mother-in-law for a while, the man would marry her.

In other words, she learned from his mother how to take care of him, what to do with him, what he likes and does not like, how his mother cooks, how she does everything, and so on. She watched everything and learned.

Comment: So she learned to be a mother to her husband. That is certainly a paradox.

My Response: How is that a paradox?

Comment: She came there not to learn how to be a wife but to learn how to be his mother.

My Response: You cannot imagine how attached a man becomes to a woman then. If she reminds him of his mother, he will look at her like a child does! He will constantly catch his mother in her.

Question: And he will never want to get divorced?

Answer: Never! How could he get divorced? Leave his mother?

Question: So, you do not abandon your mother?

Answer: That is correct.

Comment: And what about the phrase a wife says: “Go to your mommy! I am not your mother! Let her bake your pies for you!”

My Response: You see what kind of arguments people make! “I am not your mother!” That is the problem.

Comment: And there must be a high percentage of divorces because she does not take on this role of being his mother.

My Response: She must understand that the only way to keep him, to make him hers, is this way! There is no other way. It is written in the Torah, written in the Bible, simply in black and white.

Question: So, maybe you are telling us the secret behind all divorces right now, and we do not need any psychologists?

Answer: This is the secret of clear-cut relationships. Until the end of his life, a man will see his mother in his wife and will never run away from her.

Question: And what is the man’s role in the family, then?

Answer: If he is attached to her, what more is needed?

Question: So, this is her security? Is that what she seeks in him?

Answer: Yes. Nothing else. He will do everything to make her happy. He will give her compliments every day.

Question: And he will earn money and work?

Answer: He will do everything, of course. I know this for sure. This is human nature.

Question: What does a woman need from a man? Is it this sense of security?

Answer: First and foremost, attention. Attention to her, to the children, to the home. So, once you get married, that is it! The bride goes to live with her mother-in-law and learns from her all about her son’s weaknesses. And she learns how to deal with him as a woman. Here and there, she knows how to say or do something that reminds him of his mother. He falls for it immediately, instantly, and forever.

Comment: And he will do everything she wants.

My Response: Yes. He needs this. A man does not give birth; he remains a child, and that is what wins him over.

Question: So he remains a child? All the time? Even when he is 70 or 80 years old?

Answer: It doesn’t matter!

Comment: People will not exactly be outraged, but they will ask: “What about the man? It is all about the woman, the woman.”

My Response: The man must provide everything the woman requires. Nothing more is needed. That is in the material sense. But spiritually, everything is different—the opposite.

In other words, the man’s spiritual development is not the family’s concern. It is not. It is a privilege, a prerogative. I don’t know how to put it. It is solely his personal choice. In this respect, he is the man and the head of the family. But this is regarding spiritual development. As for the material side—the woman.

In spiritual development, the man is in charge; in material development, the woman is in charge.

Question: If the man is in charge of spiritual development, then is the woman’s role to give him the opportunity to work on his soul?

Answer: Yes, of course.

Comment: And then he will also provide her with everything she needs.

My Response: Twice as much!
[359840]
From KabTV’s “News with Dr. Michael Laitman,” 7/16/26

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Question: Does the transition from the Klipa (impurity) to holiness occur through suffering?

Answer: There are two possibilities for moving from the Klipa to holiness. One is through blows, but this is a very slow path. You can remain inside the Klipa, say, as in this world, suffering through several life cycles, until your “measure becomes full,” and you begin to think about the meaning of life, and eventually start searching. As it is written: “What reason does not accomplish, time will.”

But there is also another possibility: let reason do it, not time. What does “reason” mean? It is a force of attraction from the other side, when it is not suffering that pushes you from the Klipa toward holiness, but you begin to search and ask, “Perhaps there is something good in holiness?”

Then you happen upon some group, a few friends, who show you pleasures in other things, in a different way, in a different form. In this way, you neutralize the negative development.

Question: But if I am in the Klipa, then are all my desires also in the Klipa?

Answer: Your desires are in the Klipa, while your reason, let us say, is already in holiness. You need to increase your reason, and strengthen your connection with holiness to such an extent that the image you create in your mind can withstand the pleasures that the Klipa seems to be offering you. And then you will see that it is truly worthwhile.

You must build such images in your mind that they can withstand the attraction of the Klipa. This depends on the individual, on his development.
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From the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 8/28/26, Rabash, “What Is the Work of Man, in the Work that Is Attributed to the Creator?”

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