Question: Why is it easier to endure personal misfortunes when you have friends?

Answer: When I am connected with friends, my personal problem is shared among us. If there is truly a strong bond between us and they support me by sharing my sorrow, then it is distributed among all of us.

This is precisely the meaning of visiting the sick. We tend to think that people visit the sick just to check on them, to talk with them, to bring them apples and oranges, but there is a much deeper meaning. Such a visit can actually ease the illness because we share the suffering of the friend and give him our strength.

We are all connected in one system regardless of the fact that each of us exists in a separate body. If we are connected, then all our systems connect: intellectual, emotional, and many others that we do not yet know about.

As a result, we create a shared system of connections between people, and in truth it is much greater than we imagine. Illness is a kind of malfunction in my personal system that makes me feel ill. But when my friends who are connected with me come to visit with the intention of deepening the connection, they enter my damaged system and take part in it.

If two friends come to visit me, then my malfunction is divided among the three of us. It does not yet divide evenly, but it should if we are strongly, properly, and correctly connected. We will clearly feel how we take on the other’s pain, and give the sick person our own joy and happiness in return.

Question: So if someone tells me about their problem, does it make it easier?

Answer: If there is no connection between you, this has practically no effect. Yet we know that hearing good or bad news can influence a person strongly, either lift their mood or depress them.

But if this is my friend, then we are connected as if we exist within one body. Therefore when he comes to visit me during an illness, the defect in my system is transmitted to him, and it becomes easier for me.

It is precisely because we are separated by bodies, but able to connect on a sensory level, that a friend can help heal my illness, as if taking part of it into himself. He takes a portion of the imbalance from my system and equalizes it within his own.

He eases my suffering simply by performing a good and correct action, and takes this unbalanced part onto himself with love. And besides that, his healthy system can absorb this fragment of another’s illness precisely because it is not inherently his. He takes part of the illness, isolates it within himself, and heals it within his own subsystem.

Question: Does this happen unconsciously?

Answer: Usually it happens unconsciously, but there are people on a higher level who can see how it occurs.
[155820]
From KabTV’s “New Life 242 – Happiness And Social Ties,” 10/17/13

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