We can understand reality and what happens only from an upper level downward, and there is no way we can understand the current state a person is in. If I am in a certain state, which I cannot digest or perceive, it is because this state is stabilized by the Upper at any given moment. Only by attaining the Upper, can I attain my current self. So a person never attains himself and his state.
I am on a certain level and above me there is the Upper who has totally designed me: my whole inner state and all the external conditions, since it is actually one vessel. He designed me, and I am a result of His actions; I am created by Him. I don’t understand myself, attain myself, or my reality. So I can never make the right decisions regarding this reality. I shouldn’t make any decisions regarding myself since I will surely be wrong. I don’t have the attributes that made or created me since these are the attributes of the Upper.
So when it seems to a person that he makes decisions in this world, it is absolute nonsense since it indicates his lack of understanding. In this state he is like a small child who thinks that he does something by himself and doesn’t know that the parents are watching him from a distance, guarding him from making any mistakes.
This means that I can never know my current state, the current level I am on, but only what is below that level, the levels to which I am like the Creator and they are my created beings. So if I want to attain who and what I am, then I have to attain the Creator. It is only from that state that I will understand and know who I am.
From the 3rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 2/20/14, Talmud Eser Sefirot