Question: In the past, a man and a woman were connected through a shared home and the upbringing of their children. Today what is the measure of their mutual responsibility within the family?
Answer: Today, men and women are completely independent of each other. They are prepared to be married only on condition that they will reach a higher purpose for the sake of which it is appropriate for them to change; and in this way, through mutual help and completion, they reach this level. The family can exist for the sake of this. And for the sake of something else, they cannot.
We are seeing an absolute disintegration of the family; its decline is tremendous. We already see people who don’t want to take the burden of a family upon themselves. People don’t want anything. And if the need for this is awakened, then a person invites what he requires for a home, or he constructs a temporary partnership for a number of weeks or months and leaves after that. Therefore, stable relationships can exist only for the sake of attaining a higher goal. If this goal is important, then it is important to show it from an egoistic aspect so people will aspire to marriage. And if the goal is not important, then they won’t.
Question: What is the degree of my responsibility as a man with regard to my wife, so she will feel that I am truly supporting and helping her to reach the next level?
Answer: It is up to you to understand each other because you will not reach the desired state without the other. The higher goal justifies and obligates you to bear mutual responsibility, and nothing more than this. Why are you living together at all? Why do we need to think about someone or something? Why do we need a family, a wife? This is a serious burden.
It is up to each spouse to feel the importance of the partner, to respect and value the other because they share the desire to attain the higher goal, and this is enough! This is the most correct method of connection, independent of beauty and age. We are mutually faithful to attaining the goal, and this goal is obligatory.
So we create completely different relationships, conversations, different activities, everything is completely different. First try to build a home, a family, while mutually relying on the only thing that obligates you, attaining the next level of existence, the new level or dimension. The family that we are talking about now is an elevator to the next level.
There is nothing better for strengthening the family than a husband, a wife, and between them there is nothing other than the shared, higher power that they discover and create, the shared higher existence, and besides this—nothing. As it is said, (Genesis 2:24) “A man shall leave his father and his mother and adhere to his wife.”
From Kab TV’s “Through Time” 9/21/13