From Rabash’s Article “The Difference Between Alms and Gifts”: When one applies lots of exertion for a long period of time but doesn’t achieve any result, one starts to sense pain and suffering because he contributed a lot of energy but doesn’t see any advancement in his work.
Then, contemplations come to him one by one. One despairs and then strengthens, then falls and rises again and again. This process continues until a real desire that stems out of his exertion at the time of ascents and descents shapes in him. With each rise and fall, one accumulates and feels pain because he has not merged with the Creator yet. When the vessel of one’s effort becomes completely full, then it is called a spiritual desire and the Creator fills it since now one has reached a true desire.
If after several years of work you suddenly understand that you have regressed, this is intentional so that you feel the pain of not merging with the Creator. So, you need to realize that with each round of ascents and descents, you are getting closer to creating a true vessel. It is impossible to obtain the perfect fulfillment before obtaining a perfect desire.
We see that each passing year brings us a better understanding of Rabash’s words. He explains everything very accurately and his words penetrate deep into our souls.
Many years of rises and falls of every possible kind pass by until one starts experiencing a real necessity to acquire the properties of bestowal. It happens as a result of the Light’s work on us in response to the exertions we apply. Besides, “That which is not accomplished by the mind will be accomplished in time.” Because of our activities such as our studies, dissemination, mutual support, and congresses, we become integrated into each other. It means that everybody goes through changes, although some of you go through them faster than others.
Some of you confuse yourselves by observing other methodologies and allowing alien influences and surroundings to impact you. Here, I don’t mean the typical environment we all live in, but rather your attempts to find alternative spiritual practices. So each of you advances in your own way, but since everybody is included in the others and contributes oneself into everybody else, there are rises and falls that serve as a good sign of the internal work you do.
As a result, one starts sensing that bestowal is not “foreign” to him anymore. It is no longer flavorless, tasteless, or odorless; it is not empty words about giving, pleasing the Creator, or loving our neighbors, which previously were lifeless slogans. All of a sudden, one begins feeling the taste of them; this means that spiritual vessels begin to shape in him. We start feeling real life in these words, a taste: bitter or sweet, ascent or descent.
Bitterness and sweetness are felt in the heart, and higher or lower are evaluated according to reason. This is how we assess these concepts, and suddenly they start triggering internal responses in us. When one hears words about love or hatred in relation to spiritual work, to bestowal and receiving, one reacts to them in one’s heart and mind. Thus, he starts differentiating between these two qualities internally.
However, it is not sufficient. One should continue working until a true desire for the Creator, the perfect property of bestowal, appears. Nothing is incomplete in spirituality. The smallest spiritual vessel, which is revealed in a person, the desire to merge with the Creator, the property of bestowal that completely fills him, is in fact the entire person.
One senses that he is completely defined by spiritual genes (Reshimot) that unfold in him. At the next level, he will discover that his previous Reshimo constituted only one gram of his subsequent Reshimot, which in their turn already weigh a million tons. So far, he is as an infant who received a sweet piece of candy, is completely absorbed by it, and thus feels the entire world as sweet.
Those who advance eventually clarify their relationships to one another at the spiritual levels they reach; thus, we understand that everything is continuously accumulated and accrued. So we need to make our share of efforts and desire to achieve the perfect property of bestowal. We have to strive to become completely filled by this property in our minds and hearts, hence entirely altering our present attitude to the world by pushing aside our old outlook.
We have to lose our current attitude and evaluate everything through the Creator’s eyes, the eyes of bestowal. We still don’t know what that is, but gradually we enhance our readiness for it; this happens as a result of the Light that Reforms. When it occurs, we reach the full capacity of the desire that was completed for us by the Creator.
We are totally unable to complete this work on our own. We can reach up to 99% of the desire to bestow with the help of the Creator, but we will never attain 100%; it is beyond our power. This is why it is said that the Creator will finish this work for me, will fill our measure, and then we will receive the perfect fulfillment for a perfect desire. This is how a person is born on his first spiritual step.
We see that we are approaching this step. We have gone through many changes and continue to have a better understanding of Rabash’s words; we see that he clarifies every single step on our way. Eventually, we’ll appreciate the level of his meticulous precision. However, it is obvious that he had to clothe this knowledge in such garments so as to attract us and not repel us. So, he avoided speaking openly of what the outcome of this program could be in the very beginning of our studies. Each time he reveals it a little more, to the degree that is beneficial for the students. This is the way Kabbalists write their books.
Rabash’s articles show that he took good care of us and unveiled a new methodology of correction for us. Since we didn’t understand his writings before and started to comprehend them only today, we can now state that we really follow his path with the help of the Creator.
From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 1/25/13
The Bitter Sweetness Of Bestowal