Answer: People have various ways of studying Kabbalah. Those who want to take notes should do so. Those who don’t, should not do it. This kind of knowledge must be recorded on hearts on the desires.
Each one approaches their desires differently. I went through a very difficult path: science, graphs, vectors, tables, and so on, and it is a long way to go, but for me there is no other way to learn. That’s how I am built.
I remember that my childhood teachers complained to my father that I was solving chemical problems by applying mathematical methods. I simply couldn’t remember how various substances reacted to each other. So, I solved the problems by calculating the number of electrons they have on their external orbit. I simply was unable to see these problems from a different angle. Today, it is called “physical chemistry” or “chemical physics.”
When I studied Kabbalah without a pencil or a pen or additional tools, and if I couldn’t organize everything in a table or a dictionary, it simply did not exist for me.
However, Kabbalah has nothing to do with all of this. A person must open his mouth, heart, ears, and eyes so that this knowledge enters inside him.
Question: What kind of preparation do we need for that? After all, to “open our mouths,” we must be ready for that.
Answer: There are people who perceive the world only so. But the problem is in them; they are very shallow and that’s why their penetration into the material they study is very superficial. “Ah-ah-ah!” That is all they say.
When you resist and turn on your brain, your “Ah!” goes through your mind, which is always full of tremendous opposition. I would compare it with induction resistance when the electric flow circulates through a torus and accumulates momentum. You unmistakably feel how it works, how your internal contours change. It shapes you!
The remodeling that we receive is very difficult since we must breakdown our previous form to a shapeless mass. We must crash our “flesh” and make it an amorphous mass even though it is assembled so accurately and our internal organs work so well, notwithstanding that they work egoistically. Then, we should reshape this formless mass anew. This process must be accompanied by the awareness that it is we who should do this work on ourselves. Our apprehension that it is much better for us if we do it ourselves should become so strong that we even begin asking for it.
Yet, the pain does not vanish. However, we neutralize it by the higher purpose. It is as if we perform surgery on ourselves. I don’t want to scare anyone off, but it is exactly how it should be that way in our awareness.
It is not an easy thing to deal with. It takes time. When one begins associating oneself with the Creator and begins to regard one’s egoism as “a help against him,” then one can rejoice because his egoism undergoes numerous tsunamis and hurricanes that smooth it out—beat, knead, mince, and make ashes out of it. Ashes cannot be resurrected into anything but the initial state.
If the pain persists, it means that we haven’t merged with the Creator yet. It is an indication of one’s integration with the Creator! When everything is ground down and turns into ashes, as it is written, “For dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thy return,” then, Adam will emerge, that is, a Man that is built in a completely new internal structure. This is what we must go through.
From KabTV’s “Secrets of the Eternal Book,” 4/28/13